Chenford - more depth

Chapter 104

Tim's pov
I don't know what to do, I have to go back and talk to her. I need to know she's okay, why did I break my promise.
I promised I would never leave her again no matter how much she tries to push me away. She wasn't herself, I mean I don't blame her, but I need to be there for her.
I have to go talk to her.
I take a deep breath in before I lift my head up off the steering wheel. I turn to open the car door but I hear the front door open and then shut.
I look in the rear view mirror, I notice Lucy walking out of the door. Shes wearing her black trainers, black leggings and a tight black top, house keys in her hand as she locks the door. She spins around looking at the van for a second before she walks towards her car.
I jumped out of the van walking straight towards her.
"Lucy" I shout and she just ignores me and carries on walking. "baby?"
Her eyes look so lost, that sparkle isn't there. She's trying to process something, I can see it. It's the same look she had back when she did them UC cases, on the way home from the court, on so many occasions. But this was different.

Lucy's pov
I lock the front door,  I turn around notice that Tim's van is still there.
Why is he still here? I told him to go, he said he would go. I can't..
I look around and then glance back at his van, I see him in the driver's seat, his cheeks are flustered. I hear the van door open and I just turn towards my car.
I keep walking straight ahead.
"Lucy?" He shouts.
Keep walking, I can't do this. I need to go prove myself and I can't lie to Tim if he asks if I'm okay.
"Baby?"
I unlock the car door, and I grab the door handle to open the car.

"Oww" I feel Tim grabbing my arm back towards him, turning myself to look at him in the face. The cuts on my wrist stings as he keeps his grip onto my arm, my face scrunching up. "Let go" I say softly looking up at him.
"Lucy hey.."
"Tim let go of me" I say softly.
"Where are you going?"
"No where...please Tim let go you're hurting me"
He lets go of my arm and I sigh deeply. "Thank you"
"Hurting you? Lucy?"
"Nothing.. my arms just sore from erm working out that's all, I thought you was going to go see Angela or something?" I ask him confused as I look down at the floor, I can't look at him. I can't look at him when he is looking at me as if I'm fragile.
"I called Angela and then I decided it was wrong for me to have left you so I was going to come and talk to you."
"No Tim. I asked you for space, why can't you respect that?"
"Because Luce..I care about you and I know that you aren't okay. I shouldn't have left you. I should have made your parents leave way before they did. I promised I wouldn't leave you no matter how much you pushed me away and I did. I left. I'm sorry. Look can we go back inside and talk please?"
"Tim I get it...you want to keep the promise and you have. But you have to give me space too...look I need to go." I say as I get into the driver's seat, he grips on to the car door stopping me from shutting the door.

He crouches down and looks at me, I keep looking forward as I put the keys in the ignition.  I feel his eyes glaring at me. My hearts racing, I can feel my eyes filling up, almost watering.
I swallow deeply, biting my lip.
"Why don't you want me around you?" He asks.
"What?" I splutter out, still remaining looking forward. I know if I look at him I'll break down and I can't do that. I need to go, I need to go prove myself. I need to go do this.
"Why don't you want me around you Luce? Have I done something?" He asks nervously.

Tim's pov
She knows I've got the test, she must do. Why else wouldn't she want me around her, it would make sense because I couldnt even ground her.
Why did I keep that test, it was stupid. Ive caused her so much pain with it, let alone the fact I'm failing to get her pregnant.
I want to be there for her. I know that we need to talk.
I don't understand where she is going, it doesn't make sense. She said she was going to have a bath and go to bed. Which admittedly doesn't make sense when she had a shower easier before her parents came, I forced her to because she was stressing about everything.
And now for her to be going out..
What did happen with her mum in the bathroom?
"Why don't you want me around Luce? Have I done something?" I ask her nervously.
I can feel my heart racing, she won't even look at me.

Lucy's pov
"You haven't done anything..I just want some space. Can you please let go of the car, I need to go" I say softly.
"Have some space at home Luce where it's safe, I'll sleep in the spare room if that's what you want. It's getting late..please? I don't understand where you need to go? You said you wanted to go to bed?"
"I..I just need to go do something's, I'll be home soon."
"Luce go get in the house please?"
"Tim. Please. I'll be home soon, I promise." I say desperately.
"What if you don't come back?" He says nervously, the second he says it I immediately turn and look at him. His eyes are red, his cheeks flushed. I feel a tear roll down my face.

I almost hear my heart shatter, the realisation that my parents are the main cause of another issue that me and Tim are having. The fact because of everything that I found out about my parents, the website, and the threats they made, caused me to run away. I was doing it to protect him, because I loved him more than I have ever loved anyone. The one I feel the safest with. But I infact hurt him to the point where me leaving right now scares him. He thinks I won't come back home.

"Tim..i..I'm sorry... I promise you that I will come home." I say as I lift my pinky up towards him. He lifts his pinky up too, we link pinkys as we kiss our hand. I moved my hand away back to the steering wheel. "hey and besides a wise man said don't think about the what ifs" I half giggle.
"I know baby, I just can't go through you running away like that again"
"I know, and I am sorry."
He leans forward and kisses me gently on the lips and then pulls away. "come inside Luce"
"Tim I really do have to go do this. I'll be home soon and we can watch top chef or whatever you want yeah?"
"Okay babe.." he sighs. "You'll be safe?"
"I always am" I smile at him.
"I love you babe, and I'll see you soon yeah?"
"You will Tim, love you" I smile at him as I turn the engine on, he leans forward and kisses me on the cheek, and then he shuts the car door.
Breathe.
I start driving off the drive, I see Tim stood at the top of the driveway waving as I drive down the street.