I'm Miracle (Islamic Story)

Chapter 67

Chapter 67

"It is not your fault. It doesn't matter how many times I say this, since you will never believe until you understand. That's why you're here. Sometimes, bad people think they have control over our lives. They make us believe they have control. But.. In the end, it is us who have control. It is you who has control. You survived there. You made it out of there, on your own, under your own control. You had control of the whole situation. Yes, they made you believe that it was all your fault and that they had the power over your life, but that's not true. You will learn it. You will experience it here and you will learn in the end, that it has never been your fault and that you won" Robin, my therapist, said. I was at a farm where they had horses for people like me. For people who believe they have no control and are powerless. Robin was trying to change that thought. I didn't understand why I was here, but I liked taking care of the horses. In the beginning, I didn't know what I had seen, I hadn't seen a horse before. I hid behind Iyaz and kept shaking till he calmed me. Since then, I come here every two days to do the same routine again. My horse, Fredo, was the hightlight of my week.

"You coming here, smiling at Fredo, taking care of him, feeding him, walking him- everything means you have control. Control is not necessarily a bad thing. Look, you have control over Fredo, but you use that in a good way. Control is not your enemy, control is your tool" she said when she saw me being a bit uneasy when Fredo moved away from me.

"Did you have fun?" Iyaz asked me when he was picking me up. He was with the bodyguard and a police officer. They were following us everywhere since he was still out. I didn't really understand what they meant by that but I knew my mind didn't want to understand. I nodded, smiling at Iyaz who was leaning against his car. I went in and he drove us off.

"You know, I'm starting to get jealous of Fredo. You are spending way too much time with him" he said, smirking. He always said the same thing, over and over again.

"Well if only you were as nice as him" I joked back, making him raise his eyebrows with wide eyes.

"Do you want to eat out?" he asked me. I shook my head. I liked eating with his family. They spread this warmth off that I felt like I needed to breathe in. Plus, his mum was an amazing cook and the food always tasted so familiar.

"After dinner, I want to talk to you about something, okay?" he asked me and I nodded. He became a little tense after that but I shrugged ito ff. When we arrived home, Tuana opened the back door. Her faces fell and she rolled her eyes.

"Oh, isn't it my favorite brother" she said while moving aside. Iyaz just laughed and shook his head.

"You only have one, smartkid" he replied while taking his shoes off. I did the same and looked at Tuana. She smiled at me.

"Mum made fish today, my favorite dish" she said, making me and Iyaz groan. We didn't like that food and even though I didn't say anything about it, Iyaz spoke for me.

"You don't even like fish! You just do this because you are jealous of the awesome me" Iyaz said and they started bickering again. I walked over to the kitchen, seeing his mother chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the plates right away and put them on the table. She turned towards me and smiled.

"I have four daughters yet you are the one who thinks of helping me. Thank you" she said, making me feel a bit uneasy so I just smiled. I helped her some more before everyone seated for dinner. I looked at Iyaz, already disliking the smell of fish. I actually had to laugh when I looked at him. He had the biggest scowl on his face.

"This is so good, thanks mum, I knew I was your favorite child" Tuana said, sticking her tongue out at Iyaz. His mother just smiled before she left to the kitchen counter and came back.

"But because I love these two even more, I made them pizza since they don't like fish" she said while putting some slices of pizza on my and Iyaz's plate. The frown on Tuana's face was indescribable. Her mouth was wide open and her eyes spit fire.

"Looks like you bit your own leg. Enjoy the fish you oh so like" Iyaz said while taking a huge bite of his pizza. His family all started laughing except for Tuana. If I didn't know they were just joking around, I would've felt bad for her.

I sat down next to Fatima. The whole family was seated in the living room watching TV. I stood up when I realized his mother was in the kitchen and went to bring the tea. I had two cups of tea in my hand when I went back. The noise of the TV was what made me stop.

"An 8-year-old Syrian boy was assaulted and murdered by the 18-year-old Afghan boy his family knew too well. The 18-year-old was supposedly friends with the 8-year-old and they had been together all the time. The little boy even visited his house a few times. After searching on the security cameras, the police identified the murderer and arrested him. He admitted that he killed the little boy and threw him away in a trash can. Further investigation will be hold. The whole incident became known when the parents of the little boy went on the Turkish crime solving programme. His whole town was searching for him for three days, with sadly, finding a lifeless body in the end. His family was shattered by the news. Here are the images of that. We wish that no-" I jumped from the sound of glass shattering. I looked down, realizing that I was the one who dropped them. My vision started to get blurry and I felt my hands shake. Anxiety started creeping into my body, wanting nothing more than to turn me off. I saw a woman and man crying, falling to the ground. A lot of people. A lot of people were crying. I looked over at Iyaz. He had his eyes closed. His mother was sat next to him and his father next to the other. They were both holding his hands. I looked at the TV again, suddenly feeling so helpless. I felt like everything I had built with Robin fell down. I felt this loneliness fall over me, making me hug my arms from the cold. Where was my security, my family?..

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This chapter was supposed to be up by now, but I had lost my inspiration and watched a few documentaries. The news part in this chapter is true and happened last week in Turkey. I binge-watched some episodes today that's why its so late. I have been crying and thinking of this story the whole time. There is this crime investigating tv programme in Turkey that has found lost people (dead or alive) and has solved a lot of murders. This one was one of them. An 8-year-old pure joy, raped and killed by a dude that was 'loved' in the town. Sick pedophile- I have been swearing at him the whole day. Funny thing is if he did this in Afghanistan, he would've had death penalty. Wish it was the same in Turkey. The cries of the family of the little boy is still ringing in my eats. I pray for him and his family.