the book of fluff (that usually isn't)

roses

so i know i did a bachelor one a while back but i wanted to do another with a different plot oops

also i know this isn't entirely accurate i had to alter it a bit to fit the plot

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trigger warning: mentions of a panic attack

It was late at night. Mitch was still awake, his mind too loud to even consider the possibility of sleeping. You see, he was a contestant on the hit show, The Bachelor. He had fallen in love with the bachelor, Scott Hoying, and he was one of the final three. The next day was the final rose ceremony between now and the big proposal. He knew that if he didn't get a rose, he would be heartbroken.

The little sleep Mitch got that night was riddled with nightmares. The next morning, they were all given the day off to relax before the rose ceremony that night. To Mitch, it was just a day for his anxiety to swirl out of control. He just barely managed to keep from having a panic attack.

At a quarter to seven, Mitch dressed in the nicest clothes he had. He took a moment to panic, not knowing whether he should wear a dress or a suit. Eventually, he settled on a dress, though he regretted it almost immediately after making his way downstairs. The other two men were wearing suits, and he felt insecure, his arms wrapping around his stomach almost immediately.

Chris came into the room and offered all of them a small smile. "Good evening. Scott will be with you shortly." Mitch felt his heart began to race and his breathing speed up, and he dug his nails into his stomach to keep himself from having a panic attack.

When Scott walked in, Mitch's breath was taken away, just like the first time he laid eyes on him. His heart rate sped up again, but this time, it was because the love of his life had entered the room. He wanted more than anything to collapse in Scott's arms, but he told himself that he could go home. Scott probably didn't feel the same way about Mitch as Mitch felt about Scott.

"These past few weeks have been... amazing." Scott's voice was soft, and Mitch swore it was shaking ever so slightly. "All three of you are amazing. I-... This has got to be the hardest decision I've made on this show. Whatever happens, just know that you are beautiful and worth it and you deserve love just as much as everyone else." Silence fell as Scott closed his eyes and tried to collect himself, swallowing hard. Mitch's heart was beating so loudly he was terrified everyone could hear it.

"Kyle," Scott said softly, making eye contact with said person. Kyle smiled relievedly and made his way down to Scott. "Will you accept this rose?" Scott asked quieter, and Kyle didn't hesitate before he nodded. "Yes. Of course." Scott smiled and pinned the rose onto Kyle's jacket, and Mitch noticed his hands were trembling. Mitch himself felt like he was going to collapse.

There was silence for a long time. Scott was staring at the rose, his breathing shaking. "Clay." Mitch felt his heart shatter as Clay smiled and walked to him, and he kept his gaze determinedly on the ground, knowing he'd cry if he so much as looked at the man he'd fallen for so quickly and so, so hard.

Chris stepped in, offering the lone boy a sympathetic smile. "Mitch, I'll let you say your goodbyes." Mitch flinched at the sound of his name, and he flinched again when he felt Scott's arms around him. "Mitchy," Scott breathed, and it took everything Mitch had to not break down in tears. "I'm so sorry. I... I don't know what to say." No matter how hard Mitch tried to fight it, tears began slipping out of his eyes, and he buried his face in Scott's shoulder to muffle the soft sobs escaping his lips. Scott closed his eyes against the tears leaking out of his own eyes and buried his face in Mitch's neck, holding onto him so tightly he was afraid he wouldn't be able to let go.

Mitch couldn't bring himself to pull away for a long time. He wanted to ask what was wrong with him, how he'd messed up, but he didn't want to embarrass himself further. Scott had managed to control himself, but Mitch still had silent tears streaming down his cheeks as the blond led him to the car. They shared one last goodbye kiss before Mitch crawled into the car and he started the journey home.

The ride was silent. Mitch knew he was supposed to be talking, but he felt like as soon as he opened his mouth he'd start sobbing again. He buried his face in his hands and pathetically tried to wipe away his tears. Every breath he took hurt, like he was being stabbed repeatedly right in the heart. He yelled at himself for wearing the dress.

+++

A few days passed. Mitch didn't leave his lonely apartment in Los Angeles, choosing to stay in his room and cry. He wondered if Scott had chosen Kyle or Clay. In a way, he supposed this was for the best. He knew Scott deserved better than him.

Meanwhile, it was time for Scott to propose to either Kyle or Clay. He'd spent the days meeting their families and going on one last one-on-one date with each of them, though Mitch's absence was like a hole in his heart. He tried to ignore it, focus on the remaining men, but it was no use. Mitch was constantly on his mind.

Scott approached the two men, the velvet box clutched tightly in his hand. They were both fidgeting nervously as he stated at them and swallowed hard. "I- I can't do this," he whispered shakily, stepping away from them. "I'm so sorry. I made a mistake. I need- I need Mitch."

Stunned, Kyle and Clay watched as Scott hurried off and grabbed Chris. "I made a mistake," he rushed out. "Please. Mitch is the one I love. I want to marry Mitch."

+++

The next day, Mitch was woken up by a knock at his door. He sniffled and reluctantly emerged from his cocoon of pillows and blankets, briefly glancing in the mirror to fix his hair and make himself look somewhat presentable before he went to open the door.

His heart shattered all over again when he saw Scott standing there, the sight of him bringing back the memory of the night that seemed so long ago. He wrapped his arms around himself, suddenly feeling very self-conscious in his t-shirt and sweatpants. He wished he'd at least brushed his teeth before he'd gone to open the door.

Scott's heart ached at the sight of Mitch, and the fact that he knew he was the cause of his state hurt even more. "Mitchy, I made a mistake," he whispered, gripping the velvet box tightly. Mitch looked up at him quickly, though he was trying to stamp out the hope growing in his chest. "I don't know what I was thinking," Scott continued softly. "You-... I could never be with Kyle or Clay. They're amazing guys, but... but they're not right for me. I fell in love with you. I love you, Mitch. So, so much."

Tears filled Mitch's eyes at his words, but they were happy tears. "Wh-What? Is this some kind of joke?"

"No. No, I swear it isn't. I am in love with you." Scott sighed shakily and sunk down to own knee, opening the velvet box to reveal the glittering ring inside. "I made a mistake before. You are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. You are the one I want to wake up next to for the rest of my life. You are the one that I want to laugh with, cry with, raise a family with... I want to see those beautiful brown eyes that I fell in love with from now to forever. Mitchy, will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me?"

Mitch sobbed loudly and frantically nodded, his heart racing in his chest. Scott smiled relievedly, tears in his own eyes, and straightened to slide the ring into his finger. As soon as he was standing on both feet, Mitch attacked him in a hug, crying into his neck. "I love you too... I love you too..." he sobbed, clutching onto him almost desperately. Scott held him as tightly as he dared, almost fearing he'd break the small boy in his arms. Mitch sniffled and pulled away just enough to kiss him passionately. "I wish I'd have known you were coming. I would've changed into something more appropriate," he mumbled against his lips, and Scott smiled into the kiss at those words. "You look perfect," he mumbled back, slipping his hand up Mitch's shirt to rest in between his shoulder blades.

Mitch was the one to pull away. He stared up at Scott as though he'd never seen him before, smiling through his tears. "I love you." Scott smiled himself and bent to kiss them away. "I love you more, Mitchy."