Shoto Todoroki Oneshots

Fun At The Funeral

TRIGGER WARNING: none

THEMES: comedy, the Todorokis are little shits

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"We are gathered here today to honour the life of the great man Enji Todoroki, also known as Endeavour. He was an incredible hero with a passion for helping people, and the people of the lives he affected will truly miss him. But nevertheless, today we are here to celebrate the man and his achievements, and to be present with his wonderful family who are currently in mourning."

"Ha! Did you hear that!"

"He called us wonderful?! Wow, he's a better father already!"

"I know! But are we really in mourning? I mean, we did bet over who got to pull his plug!"

"Hahaha!"

The assembly of people present at Endeavour's funeral turned with wide, shocked eyes to the members of the Todoroki family. They were sitting in the front row of the hall and all had tears rolling down their faces, not from mourning, but from humour. The one leading the funeral also looked stunned at the reactions of Enji's children before shakily continuing; he had to raise his voice to be heard over all the snickering.

"To begin, let us sing a song of joy and peace as we wish for Enji's peaceful rest in the world beyond ours-"

"It won't be very joyous!"

"Or peaceful!"

"That man's going straight to hell!"

"Yeah, he's probably screaming at us from down there right now!"

"Hahaha!"

"Let's all stand as we sing." the leader continued and the crowd shakily stood up, all heavily confused at the children's behaviour. Some put it down to grief and denial, whilst some saw them as incredibly rude children who were being disrespectful to their father. 

But did the Todoroki siblings care? Hell no!

They manage to get through the first song, and then the speeches of some heroes such as Hawks, and then a few more songs and words before Enji's coffin was carried out of the hall and into the hearse to head to the cemetery. All four siblings alongside Hawks and Midnight carried the coffin, and when they passed the crowd everyone bowed their heads in respect. 

"I can't believe we're carrying dad's coffin!"

"I know right, he should be grateful that we even showed up!"

"The old man just wants to punish us until the last possible moment!"

"Oh well, at least we're the ones who will lower him into the grave!"

"Yeah, we can all let him down one last time!"

"Hahaha!"

Once they arrived at the cemetery, the assembly circled the grave and read the inscription:

Enji Todoroki

Endeavour

A great hero and loving father

 He will be sorely m̶i̶s̶s̶e̶d̶  pissed

Some members of the crowd actually ended up crying at how terrible the funeral was going, whilst the Todoroki siblings smirked at the headstone with splatters of red on their black clothes and hands; it was visible on the prints on the coffin. At long last, when the coffin was resting in the hole in the ground, there was a final call for anyone to say a few words.

"I'd like to if I may."

Shoto Todoroki walked to stand beside the coffin, wiping awake fake tears as he chucked a dandelion onto the coffin. That's right, he threw a weed atop his father's coffin. He then clasped his hands and took in a deep breath; the assembly subconsciously taking one too:

"I only have three words... fuck you dad!"

Then he made the biggest middle finger gestures at the headstone repeatedly before returning to his solemn state and whispering blankly:

"You will be sorely pissed."

Well this set the Todoroki siblings off again, and Fuyumi had to stop Natsuo from falling into the grave. Dabi, who was allowed to attend the funeral as an exception, was visibly shaking with mad glee in his eyes- alongside pride at how awesome Sho had become- in order to not rip off any staples. 

A few people actually left in the afternoon, just before the afterparty, as the whole funeral was very strange indeed. Did the children of Enji not miss their father? Grieve him? And it was lucky that those people left before the afterparty, because the first song that came on would have made them scream.

"I'd like to thank everyone for attending the old man's funeral today." Natsuo said before flashing a huge smile. "But now all the boring stuff is over we can dance and drink!"

"And our dearest little brother made the playlist for this evening's party, with help of our eldest sibling."

"I hope you like it." Shoto stated before pressing play, Dabi smirking as the beat commenced.

'Another one bites the dust
Another one bites the dust
And another one gone and another one gone
Another one bites the dust
Hey I'm gonna get you too
Another one bites the dust...'

It was safe to say that several more people left the afterparty. Everyone else found it to be a funny joke and began to talk and dance with each other, making the most of the free food and drink. And, since the Todoroki siblings were now in possession of all Endeavour's credit cards, they didn't hesitate to go all out. 

Shoto headed over to one corner of the room, where his classmates were sitting around big circular tables and talking happily. When they saw him they stood up and cheered, and Todoroki actually laughed, accepting a drink from Momo.

"You've really outdone yourself Todobro!" Kirishima complimented.

"Thankyou. This is the most fun I've had in a while."

"I can't believe you graffitied on your father's grave Todoroki!" Iida exclaimed.

"Well is he going to be missed? Hell no. Will he be pissed off? Incredibly so." Shoto explained before smirking. "Do you like the music?"

"Hell yeah!" 

"What flavour is the cake? Midoriya asked, gesturing to the giant cake at the centre of the buffet table.

"Oh, it's chocolate flavoured."

"The whole thing?!"

"Yes. Father hated chocolate. So we had to have the whole thing made of the stuff."

"This is incredible Icyhot. Who knew you could be so funny?"

"Naturally."

Shoto then walked over to some of the heroes and talked with them, most of them having enjoyed the funeral too, though they were adults and couldn't condone the behaviour. But to see the Todoroki siblings all happy and together? They could make some exceptions.

"Hey kid, want me to do some DJing with your songs?" Mic asked as he refilled his glass of punch.

"Sure, that sounds like a good idea."

The hero grinned before heading up onto the stage and looking through the song list. He laughed so loudly at the songs, and had a blast DJing with them. The Todorokis went around the crowd and laughed and joked whilst accepting some condolences. Dabi stuck mostly in the corner but he ended up heading out early with Hawks, saying a quick goodbye to his youngest brother with the promise to see each other again soon.

Now that Endeavour was gone, they had a whole house for them to hang out in together. They could be their own small family again. And heck, maybe, just maybe, he could see his mother again.

Shoto spent the night dancing with his siblings and classmates, having a really fun time and feeling so damn happy. Sure, there was some part of his that would mourn his father, those small happy memories from when he was an infant, but he mostly felt free. Free to live his life how he wanted, to do what he wanted to do, say and act how he wanted to, and be with who he wanted to. This freedom was so new and daunting, but he could definitely say he was looking forwards to it.

So long Endeavour...