Kabhi Toh Nazar Milao Part 3

Shayad

"Main ab bhi keh raha hun ki agar ghoomne jaana hai toh aur bohot si jagah hain... Nainital hi kyon... Naina, wahan kuch khaas hai bhi nahi dekhne ko." Sameer tried to change Naina's decision even as he handed her the tickets.

"Hum Nainital hi jayenge... uss jagah mein kya achha hai yehi toh dhoondna hai humein." She studied the tickets, happy to see the date of two days later.

"Sirf un bhayanak yaadon ke alava wahan kuch nahi hai... aur na kabhi hoga." His face had a hateful, dejected look.

Naina held his hand as he turned to leave, "Pata hai, Sameer, agar kisi jagah hum sirf ek baar jaayein aur wahan hamare saath kuch bura ho jaaye toh humein uss jagah se hi nafrat ho jaati hai... yeh baat samajh aati hai, kyonki aisa hona swabhavik hai."

He gave her a puzzled look, wondering why she was insisting on going to Nainital when she was validating his hatred for the place.

"Lekin agar hamari buri yaadein uss jagah se judi ho jahan humne apni zindagi ka ek lamba arsa guzara hai toh uss jagah ko dosh dena theek nahi hota." Her soft voice did not soothe him like other times.

"Tumhe pata nahi hai, Naina... jab bhi unn sadkon se guzarta tha, mujhe iss baat ka ahsaas hota tha ki main sabse kitna door hota jaa raha hun... mujhe nafrat hoti thi hostel ka gate dekh ke kyonki uss jagah ne mujhe unse door kiya tha jinke paas rehna chahta tha main." His voice quivered at the end.

She made him sit on the couch, sitting next to him.

"Nainital ne tumhe nahi bulaya tha... hostel tumhe khud lekar nahi gaya tha." She looked into his eyes as she stated what he always knew but hid under the criticism for the place.

His eyes filled up with pain... had his mom not left him there, the mention of that place would not have evoked such bitterness in him.

"Nahi Sameer, kisi ko dosh mat do... waqt ki aur haalat ki majboori hoti hai jo humein buri yaadein deti hai... unn yaadon ke liye hum wahan jaana nahi chod sakte jahan humne unn palon ko jiya hai... main jaanti hun tumhe sab purani baatein yaad ayengi wahan jaake... lekin jab ussi jagah hum saath honge toh hamare khoobsurat pal uss bure waqt ko dhak denge... uske baad tum jab bhi yaad karoge toh hum dono ka khyal hi ayega wahan ke naam se." Her words clouded his eyes again.

A wave of agony flashed in her eyes, "Mere bachpan ke saare din toh yahin Ahmedabad mein beete hain... jo bhi hua, jo taiji, tauji aur papa ne..." she gulped, holding back the lump that formed in her throat, "Woh saari yaadein toh issi jagah ki hain na... chachaji ke ghar ki hain... hamare school ki hain... toh kya humein yeh jagah bhi chod deni chahiye?"

It jolted him out of the deep crevasses he was drifting into... she was right. She had seen much worse days, here in this city, in the very house that felt like home to him... and even to her. And, after observing Rakesh in two years in school, he had no doubt that his behaviour must have been more repugnant when a much younger and vulnerable Naina was facing him.

The anger in depth of his eyes gave her an inkling of what was going on in his mind.

"Lekin ab main jab bhi uss ghar ko yaad karti hun toh tum dikhte ho... kabhi balcony se upar aate hue, kabhi darwaze ke paas khade hue, kabhi chupke se kamre mein mujhe apni baahon mein lete hue... aur kabhi sehra baandh ke ghodi pe aate hue." The bliss she felt gave more radiance to her face.

A smile tugged the corner of his lips.

"Aur school ke naam par toh tumhara woh mujhse pehli baar takrana, nahi, takrate takrate bach jaana... aisa lagta hai meri zindagi ussi pal mein shuru hui thi... saari yaadein tumse hi judi hain, Sameer... chahe school mein hum baat nahi karte the par tumhe dekhne se hi mera dil khushi se jhoom jaata tha... sachhi Sameer, har jagah se juda tumhara koi khyal mann ko gher leta tha... gate se bike pe aate hue tumhare baalon ka udna, parking mein baith ke doston se baatein karna, ground mein kabhi basketball kabhi cricket aur kabhi kho kho khelna, jhuk ke nal se paani peena, corridor mein idhar udhar dekhte hue tez kadmon se chalna, Munna Pandit ke liye meri class mein aana aur desk pe ulte baithna..." Her eyes glittered at each memory.