Magic Mirror

Prioritizing Myself Now 🇮🇩

Hi! I'm Maggie and I am from Indonesia 🇮🇩 and THIS IS MY STORY.

A few years ago I was at my worst. I reached rock bottom and I thought I could never ever get out. I am not a person who usually opens up because if I do try to open up and be truthful about my feelings and emotions people will either leave me or respond in a way that it doesn't matter how I feel all that matters is how they feel.

This really took a toll on me because I started to put other before me. As clique at it spuds it was true. I always thought that no one loves me and they were there just so they had company, not to have someone to love and care about.

And the results of that- I started to become more reserved and "fake" in a way that I wouldn't let myself truly love my friend or that person because I would be scared that if I open myself up they would shut me down and not love the person I really am. This got so bad that I had attempted to take my own life. I had the letters ready to put beside me that was addressed to my family and friends.

Telling them why I did this and what they did to me but never knew because I would hide my emotions. But the thing is that. No one would expect that I would do this because I was always happy and smiling, but the people with the biggest smile are hiding the most painful stories.

Not until I found BTS and I truly felt love and appreciation because of them. Not only love for myself but love as a whole. BTS was the best thing that ever happened to me. If I was sad I would watch bon voyage or in the soop and instantly be happy. Just seeing them make me happy.

Seeing them happy make me happy. BTS made me feel as though I was enough. And the thing is that I know I'm going to have to let go of them. And I'm not sure what I will do because they are my source of happiness and love. But I will find a way to make myself happy for them.

For BTS. My Magic shop will never be closed. Not for BTS. Not for my euphorias.

It's weird I'm telling you this because I'm still a very reserved person when speaking about me but for BTS never.