wolfstar oneshots 💕 (Finished)

144. Grief

Ok enough fluff im making yall cry again
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After Sirius' funeral, Harry lingered around the cemetery. He couldn't bear to stand in front for the whole ceremony.

Remus' eyes followed him as Harry slipped between the shoulders of some order members. Ron was going to catch up to him but Arthur held him back. "Let him gather his thoughts."

Hermione rubbed her arms sadly. She hated watching her best friend so distraught. But she stood next to Ron anyways.

Harry walked through some stones before settling on a rusty old bench. The willow tree above it shook, catching on a gentle breeze.

From a distance, he watched as some order members quickly go. Fearing they'd draw attention to themselves. The flaming haired family threw concerned looks at him.

"I'll take him back to his family Arthur. You should go home." Remus said to him.

They shared a look and Molly gave his arm a squeeze. Ron shuffled away after muttering a "Bye professor."

Harry didn't have to look, he felt the man standing by the bench.

"Need some company ?"

Harry nodded. "Please."

Remus sat at the far end of the seat. His face unreadable. Harry doesn't want to talk about Sirius. Especially to Remus, who's been through a lot. But he brings him up at the end.

"Do-do you think Sirius hates me ? For falling for a trap ?"

Remus wanted to smile, he copies James' guilty face so closely.

"It was a trap Harry. You didn't know. But you were brave enough to act on it. Sirius was proud of that, yknow?"

A pair of green eyes widened. "He was ?"

Remus nodded, offering a small smile. "He said you were a fighter. Well, sometimes aloof but it's the intention that matters."

Those emerald eyes suddenly grew glassy. "I wish he was here to say it himself. Why did he leave when I just got to have a Godfather ?"

Remus turned to face the village under the hill they were sitting on. "I wonder that too. Just when I've got my best friend back.. he leaves."

He sighed and stood back up. Cracking his bones a bit before softly nudging Harry with his foot.

"C'mon let's have a walk."

Harry came behind him. "This isn't how I imagined I'd be with you professor."

Remus let himself chuckle. "Ahh yes, in another life you might've known me as uncle Moony instead of Professor Lupin. Life is... comedic."

Harry sighed. "At least I still have you.. You're last person I know as family."

They reached the front gates and walked through the village. Leaves crunching underneath their shoes, it filled up the empty conversation.

"I miss him.. Remus."

The werewolf looked to his side. "I know Harry..I feel that way too."

They stopped to look at the new broom. Remus stared at their reflection on the glass. A decade ago it was his reflection and 3 other boys.

"At least you're civil, looking at it through the glass. Your father and Sirius would've licked the wood and flown on it until the shop keeper cried."

Harry cracked into a smile. "I guess I pick up after them."

Remus nodded. "Indeed."

Harry kicked some rocks as they passed them. His mind still full of grief and missing Sirius. Remus could tell from one look at his face. He recognizes it, from his own mirror.

"Ykno, I've read somewhere that grief is really just love that has no place to go. It's all the words, the actions and the future we want to show this person but can't because they're not here anymore."

They stopped in front of Honeydukes for eye candy. Harry sighed. "So, what'd you reckon I do ?"

Remus remembered all those times he closed his eyes at night, hoping in the morning he'll be back in his Hogwarts dorm. Those lonely werewolf filled nights where he hugs himself and wishes the moon gave him his friends back. Gave him Sirius back.

"Well, you can continue showing that love but to other things." Remus said, looking down at their shoes.

"My best friends passed away so the only way I can show my love for them is by teaching their son, guarding him from afar. I guess Sirius thought the same too."

He looked up to find the same green eyes from all those years ago. They were teary and his cheeks had a flush to them. "But Harry, the most important thing, you have to direct that love back to you. Like the dementors, joy is a universal healer."

Harry sniffed a bit. "Can I go home with you ?"

Remus nodded, messing up his hair. "Of course, you can."

They reached Grimmauld Place as the sun sets. Harry spends his time walking through the halls his Godfather grew up in. He imagines what his days would look like.

Remus was preparing their dinner when he hears the press of keys.

He dropped the onion he was holding and pressed his palm to his mouth. The tears gathered in his eyes. 

When he heard it, his mind asked for Sirius excitedly. He had to remember, he isn't here anymore. That he can't get distracged, he had to be stronger for Harry.

He'll direct his love from the man he loved to his core to the boy who lived despite of everything.

Remus gathers his thoughts and went to the piano room. He saw the fluffy black hair and his heart clenched.

"Can you play Remus ?" He asked, voice croaking from the tears.

"Sirius taught me." He said. "Do you know Queen ?"

That night, Remus squeezed on the little bench by the piano. This time with the person whose future he gets to help.

He sat back as he watched Harry pick up the chords he just showed him. He thinks to himself.

"Oh Sirius, you'd be so happy to hear me say this, Queen is better than any other band.

Maybe because it reminds me of you the most."