Road To Victory

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I didn't realize I was going to rehab as soon as I was. San said the end of the month, not two days after the engaged couple came home. But I guess I don't deserve much coddling when it comes to something as serious as this. Honestly I've felt fine; I haven't had any desire to undo any of the progress I've made.

I personally don't believe I even need to go to rehab anymore, but I'd rather not argue with San and Wooyoung. I wouldn't be as okay as I am if it weren't for them and their help.

"How long are you sticking me in here for?" I asked lightheartedly. I figured it would be anywhere around two weeks to a month.

"It's a 90 day program." Wooyoung said, keeping his eyes on the road.

"What?" I exclaimed, not knowing this until now.

"Hyunjin, most serious recovery programs are this long." He explained. "You need it."

"I need a month, not 90 fucking days."

"Is some extra time really gonna ruin your life?"

"Yes!"

"How?" He was already fed up with my outburst. But this very important piece of information definitely would've been nice to know.

"I'll miss Felix's birthday." I whined. That was my main concern overall. I had a whole thing planned and now it's in the toilet.

"You can have visitors."

I gave him the deadliest side eye I could, in absolute disbelief that he's being like this.

"This," I dramatically looked him up and down as he drove, "this is annoying. You are annoying me."

"Oh really?" He smiled, suddenly so amused. "The person who is doing everything in their power to help you is annoying." He nodded. "Noted." I crossed my arms and began to pout. "You are so damn lucky to have me so how about you try being a little less annoying. How about that? Sound good?"

"Stop being a dick." I muttered under my breath.

"Stop doing drugs."

"I've been clean since May!"

We passed the entrance sign so I knew we were here. It was actually a lot nicer than what I was picturing. When I was living in New York, Jungkook exposed me to American Horror Story so I just assumed it was going to look like the Asylum. This looks more like a fancy vacation resort. Even still, I don't have to be here for 90 days.

Wooyoung parked the car and grabbed my bag for me, then threw it at my chest. He should be grateful I didn't take the steering wheel and try to turn the damn car around.

"Let's go." He sighed, already impatient with me.

"Stop walking so fast, my bag is heavy."

"It's not, you're just lazy."

"Carry it for me." I whined.

"Who on earth do you think you're speaking to?" He was serious, but I started to laugh. "Yeah, you better be joking."

I couldn't believe how nice this place was. Then again, Wooyoung most likely wasn't going to settle for anything less than top quality. When he checked me in, a woman was kind enough to show us to my room.

"This shit is nicer than what I have now." I teased.

"I'm grateful that it's 90 days so I can have enough time to forget about your ungrateful little comment just now." I dropped my bag on the bed and started to nod in approval as I looked around. Not bad, not bad at all. "Hyunjin, please take this seriously."

"Don't call me Hyunjin, it makes me feel like I'm in trouble."

"Your little remarks all the way here are telling me you aren't serious about this." He shook his head, seeming disappointed in me.

"I am, oh my god." I scoffed. "You expect me to be all sunshine and rainbows when you drop the 90 day bullshit bomb on me?"

"I can't keep sugarcoating things to make you feel comfortable."

I crossed my arms and scoffed, looking away from him with a sassy pout on my face. "I see what's happening here."

"And that is?"

"You're going to miss me so you're purposely being mean." I turned my head slightly and winked, then back to my pouting position.

"I can't stand you." He sighed, throwing his arms around me. "I liked this place the most, it should help you. It's not just for addiction, there's therapy here too. You need someone to talk to, I know you do. You're safe here, I promise." He said quietly, petting the back of my head comfortingly. "If you think you're okay now, hopefully you'll be even better when this is over. I know you're upset about missing Felix's birthday, but he'll come visit. Plus, you have a lifetime of birthdays ahead of you. Do this for him. Do this for me too. And yourself." I nodded, resting my head on his shoulder.

"Will you be able to visit?"

He sighed, not seeming so sure. "I'll try my best, but I can't make any promises. But just count down the days. October 11th is when it's all over and hopefully you don't need to come back here."

"What if I hate it?"

"You'll get used to it."

"Do you like seeing me suffer?" I asked dramatically, placing the back of my hand to my forehead as I stared off into the distance.

"I like seeing you completely healthy." He turned my body around and started to tie my hair back for me. "Felix did a good job, although I never would've guessed you wanted plain brown."

"He wanted to surprise me. Originally he wanted pink."

"I can do pink for you since you know...I'm your actual hairdresser. Can't believe you cheated on me there." His playful mumbling made me smile. "But I've been begging San to go pink ever since he dyed that blonde hair back to black. I cried."

"Did you actually?" I laughed, turning back around.

"Oh yeah." He nodded. "I cried then didn't talk to him for a day. I was hoping he'd give up and dye it back to blonde, but it's been black for years now. What a loser." He smiled playfully, knowing he'll love anything his fiancé does.

"How did he react when you went back to the black and blonde look after all these years?"

Wooyoung started to laugh. "Couldn't get out of bed the next day." His cheeks were turning red from embarrassment.

I started to think about how Felix and I haven't had sex since we reconnected. I hope he hasn't been anticipating it or anything. In the beginning, I definitely would've been able to. But now I don't even let him see my naked body. He understands of course, but I still feel bad. I feel like sex is supposed to be such a huge part of a relationship, but I start having trouble breathing if I even think about it. Maybe I definitely do need to be here for 90 days...

"Take care of Felix for me, okay?" I was much more serious, suddenly deep in thought.

"He doesn't need to be taken care of." Wooyoung smiled. "He's all grown up, I told you that."

"I know." I sighed, already missing him. "I just feel the need to protect him."

"Then make sure you get through this so you can get home and be the only person that protects and takes care of him." I nodded, agreeing with Wooyoung completely. "I love you, Jinnie, you'll be okay."

"I love you too." We gave each other another tight hug, rocking back and forth. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too. Now be good. I don't want to get any calls from this very nice place that my best friend is acting like an idiot."

"I know." I smiled. "I'll behave."

"You better." He pointed at me with big authoritative eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, relax." I waved, dismissing his attempt to intimidate me. "I'll see you soon."

"See you soon, Jinnie."

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