Second oneshot book

Loved~Stylenny (South Park.)

Heya. I've been struggling a little tonight and I erm.................... wanted to do something to get my mind off everything.
Warnings: Cursing and a bit self hating. Also kinda mentions cheating? Also, Ky's non binary here, as well as Stan. Although that isn't shown that strongly.
Ages: 21.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Stan's POV.

I really think it should have been fair, I should have just stayed out of the way. But I just... I wanted to feel like somebody cared, for ones in my life. Sure, some people would pull names and say 'he/she/they care/cares about you' but I don't think that's the way I see things.

It's becoming despair really, my need to escape whatever situation I'm in. I'll drink, I'll try to get high, anything, just anything to feel loved for a small moment. By anybody.

And I think that's what lead me into my best friends house with no actual memory of how I got there, just looking around for one of the two people.

I go into the kitchen, the last room I have actually checked.

"Hey, Stan?" Kyle asks.

They're sat on the counter, doing coin tricks with his hand and a beer bottle's piece. It doesn't look sharp, I'd assume Ky tried to do something about how it is. Honestly, might be soft class now that I think about it, kinda looks like it. It's shining a small rainbow due to the light.

"Hey," I answer.

There are so many questions. Why am I here? Where's Kenny? They are together after all. What the fuck was my visit for? Why did I wake up here, my house isn't far away?

"Want breakfast?" Kyle asks.

I shake my head and just sit at the table. Kyle sits across from me. What the heck is it with that look? It's awkward really, it's long and painful.

"Are you uncomfortable?" They ask, surprised.

"Well you're staring at me, dude," I say.

They laugh and go back to the staring.

"I honestly-," they start.

They take a deep fucking breath.

"I don't know what the hell this is," they continue.

I look at them.

"I just-I genuinely think this is not good for me. You're not good for me, I'm not good for you. At least at the moment," they say.

I roll my eyes.

"Because if I have to be completely honest, I don't know what I'm feeling for you," they say.

I keep my eyes anywhere but them. Aren't they dating Kenny or have I missed the break up, being too caught up.

"Neither of us does," Ky says.

"Who is 'us'?" I ask.

Kyle sighs.

"Kenny and I. We genuinely have nothing, no problems, no complications, nothing. Not until you step in like you own the place!" Kyle says.

Oh fuck no.

"Ky-is this about what I think this is about?" I ask.

"Look, I know you were drunk but I-," Kyle says.

They aren't listening to me.

"I honestly don't know what to say. I felt so bad. I had to tell him as soon as I saw him, he was smiling through it and just...... said that he wasn't sure how to tell me either, what had happened between you two. We really don't know what to do here. I'm completely new to this shit," Ky says.

That's when a small part comes back to me, admittedly, very small. Pretty much the only thing I can remember is screaming, not that it was a terrified scream.

Did I, by being such a selfish whore, ruin my best friends relationship?

"You didn't break up. Did you?" I ask.

Kyle sighs and keeps their eyes on their hands.

"Right now, no," Kyle says.

"Right now?" I ask.

"We didn't expect for this to happen... we never discussed this shit! What would happen if we both cheated with the same damn person? We never expected that, I'm not sure what I feel for anybody right now, I'm not in the condition to make a decision on our relationship," Kyle says.

I could be so fucking selfish. I'm in a spot where that is very fucking possible. I'm not going to, it's just honestly terrifying.

"You're smart and you have a good sense of these things, a good sense of justice," I say.

I smile at them.

"Try to find the best option, I know you can," I say.

They rise their head.

"What do you think?" Kyle asks.

"I just told you-," I start.

"No. About us, about the situation we have. Even if you wouldn't want it, you're apart of this discussion now," Kyle says.

"I'm just..... I'm scared people, you, Kenny, anyone, will leave me like they've done so damn many times. I'm just... I don't want to act on how I feel because I feel like I would end up making you both unhappy with my feelings in the stupid mix," I say.

"Your opinion matters a lot, Stan. It's not a stupid mess, you're really valid," Kenny says.

WHERE THE FUCK DID HE COME FROM?

"I... I've had feelings for both of you for a while now actually. It's.... weird. I liked you both when you got together, it felt like a fucking knife through the heart to see you both together. That's kinda the time I started to fall, I started to think there was no way in Hell someone could love me. I'm ugly, annoying, terrible, manipulative and clearly cause problems wherever I go. And I have the tendency to let it all out after a drink or two, so, that's clearly why some cheating happened. I'm a fucking mess," I say.

"Stan.... if you told us, we would have taken you in immediately," Kenny says.

"Taken me in? What?" I ask.

"I would like to propose a poly relationship," Kenny says.

"That's genius!" Kyle says.

They take my hand as Kenny takes the other one.

"Do you want to try with us? Two idiots that couldn't fucking understand your feelings soon enough?" Kyle asks.

"Obviously," i say.

Kyle looks really relieved.

"We don't have to break up, nor do you have to leave feeling worse... thank god," Kyle says.