🌟She's Special🌟

Pay Attention

"Open this door right now," I said once again. Bella opened the door quietly and we stood for a moment. She looked me into the eyes and then turned to her desk. A bright purple box was sitting there.
"Bella, what's that?"
"It's nothing." She rushed to put it away and I grabbed her arm.
"What is this box for?"
"It's personal, stop." Tears started to come out of her eyes and I realized I may have pushed a bit too hard.
"You guys just really hate me sometimes. I know, I'm annoying aren't I?" She pushed the box under her bed and sat on the floor.
"Bella, we don't hate you. That isn't true, and you know that."
"You barely pay attention to me these days."
"Bella, that's not true."
"YES, IT IS!" She yelled.
"Bella! Cut it out!" I know fighting fire with fire wasn't the best thing. But it seemed like I had to hell for her to listen.
"You know better than to go around saying things like that and having those thoughts in your head."
"I'm only having them because they're true. You don't even pay attention to me sometimes. You didn't even ask me what I wanted to be for Halloween. I heard you asking Leia, and you didn't care to ask or help me." Oh no, I completely forgot!
"Bella, I'm sorry."
"No, you're not. You're sorry you got caught."
"Bella,"
"I don't need your help for Halloween. I can help myself."
"Bella, this is not the way to solve the problem."
"Yes, it is."
*************
The Next Day (Bella's Perspective)
Mom is just getting me so angry right now! I took out my thought box and started to write again.

I wish she would just stop being so annoying! She just won't stop bothering me. I'm absolutely not going to school today because I hate everything right now. I don't want to go to school angry, it'll make everything worse.

"Bella Danielle, I hope you're up and getting dressed for school." Mom said.
"I'm not going."
"Says who?! You're going to make everyone in this house late with your foolishness. Let's go young lady."
"I'm tired of you controlling me." And when I said that, Mom bust open the door and came inside.
"Bella, why is your room like this? This is not how a girl's room should be kept. You shouldn't be having your clothes on the floor, you have a hamper for a reason. Young lady, you're causing me to get very upset with you, go shower now."
"No, I'm not going to school. I need a break from all of you. You guys just make me upset, when you're not ignoring me you're telling me off. I don't get it. Just leave me the heck alone." I cried.
"I get that you're angry but you're not going to speak to me like that. And you know what, I'm not going to fight you like a six-year-old, stay home, but if you do, don't expect to sit here and do nothing. You will be making up the work you missed, and doing chores all day. Pick your poison young lady." She then walked over to my dresser and picked up my phone.
"And also, this is mine until further notice." When Mom left I just continued to cry while putting on my uniform. I went downstairs and grabbed a bar from the cabinet. Ignoring the food that was made for me.
"Bella, I made you eggs and toast."
"I don't want it," I said quietly. Elliot stopped zipping up Lei's coat and walked up to me.
"What's wrong? I know you're angry, but what's wrong?" He opened his arms and gave me a hug.
"I know it seems awkward but, you can talk to me too Bella. I've raised five kids before you. There isn't anything you can tell me that I haven't heard before my love."
"El, Bailey's Mom is here. Bye El!"
"Bye honey."
"Bella, I hope you're not sad anymore! Bye!" After Leia left Mom came into the kitchen.
"Bella, you're not going to make me late."
"Bye Elliot." I went outside with Mom to the car. Holding in all of the tears that wanted to come out of my mouth, I went into the car and sat quietly.
"Bella, you've stopped talking to me lately. Why is that?" Mom asked. I looked at her through the mirror and didn't answer.
"Bella, babe. Not talking to me isn't helping. You said that I haven't been paying enough attention and I'm trying to give you that attention."
"I don't want to talk to you right now. I'm very upset with you."
"Why are you upset with me sweetheart?" I sighed and looked out the window.
"Bella?!"
********
Home (Olivia's Perspective)
I felt extremely bad about this morning with Bella. I didn't know that all she wanted from me was attention. I made the situation ten times worse by trying to talk to her in the car. What was I doing? I was going to make my daughter hate me. She probably already does. It was 7 pm and Bella wasn't home yet. She's being dropped off by a friend of mines while I watch Leia.
"Mommy, now we're all done with the homework."
"That's great! Now, you can relax and watch some tv since you're all ready for bed."
"Okay, I'll go watch in the basement." She went downstairs calmly in her cute little pair of onesies and I looked at the television right in front of me. I didn't know what to do so I wrote Bella a letter and left it in her bedroom. I wanted to give her the choice of speaking to me. She didn't have to, or she could wait it out. Whatever she pleases. As long as she knew that I did recognize her feelings and that my intention was not to ignore her.
"Mom, I'm going to go study for my test."
"Alright, good luck honey."
"Thanks. Love you."
"Love you more." He waved and went upstairs and to his room. Noah is such an incredibly sweet kid. He's really growing up. I cherish every day with him. I refuse to count the days until I send him to college. I will miss him so much. I heard Ryan barking playfully and Bella speaking to him kindly.
"You were there waiting for me. Weren't you? What a good boy!"
"Woof!" Bella carried up and then walked over to me. We just stared at each other quietly as Ryan barked. I finally broke the silence a minute later.
"Are you hungry? I made dinner." She nodded and put Ryan down. She ate quietly and looked up at the tv in the kitchen.
"Bella, your eyes are swollen. Have you been crying all day?"
"No." She said, clearly lying.
"You know, the last person you want to lie to is a cop." I sat on the chair and looked Bella in the eyes.
"Be honest with me."
"I was crying." She said quietly.
"Was it about this morning?"
"Yeah."
"So then tell me buttercup. I won't judge."
"I-I was talking to my teacher."
"Your teacher? Why?"
"Because he saw me crying."
"He?"
"Yeah. And, he was trying to ask me what was wrong because I looked sad. So during lunch, I was in his room."
"Was it just the both of you?"
"Yeah. I didn't really tell him much. I missed class."
"Why did you miss class?"
"The counselors weren't there but they referred me to the AP. So I was talking to her. That's it." Bella rush's upstairs for her room and I look down at her unfinished plate of food. This lying has got to stop. What is going on?
"Ryan, sweetheart!"
"Woof!"
"Do you know what's wrong with Bella sweet boy?"
"Woof!"
"I don't either. I know she's upset with me but what else is it?" He went upstairs and I just relished in my loneliness for a moment.
"Mommy. I'm ready for bed!"
"Okay, let's read a book!"
"Yes please!"
**************
My Room (Bella's Perspective)
I read Mom's letter and I forgave her. I honestly did. But, I still had the AP on my back saying she was concerned with me. I don't want anyone worrying. It's just a one-day thing. Right? I'll talk to Mom about it when she's ready. Just not right now. I'm not ready.