🌟She's Special🌟

Thinking Big

December 20th (Bella's Perspective)
I was off from school finally, and I was in my living room in front of the fireplace reading Leia a story.
"Bella, read it again!"
"Again?!"
"I'm just joking Bella! Lucy, can we have more hot chocolate?"
"Not so soon!" She giggled and sat on my lap.
"Can you do my hair pink now?"
"Okay, but Mommy said you can only do a little bit."
"Lucy, I'm gonna have pink hair!"
"Pink hair?!"
"Mom said I could only do a streak."
"That reminds me, Bella Olivia said she wants to speak to you later."
"About what?"
"I'm not sure. Did you do something?"
"Not that I remember."
"I want pink hair, Bella!"
"Okay, alright!"
************
Shopping (Leia's Perspective)
"Are we getting presents today?"
"No, we're shopping for Elliot today."
"What are we getting him?" Mommy shrugged as we walked through the store.
"Tell me, Mommy!"
"I don't know, let's see."
"I think Elliot likes tools."
"Tools?"
"Yeah, he likes to fix things."
"I'm not sure baby girl." Mommy smiled at me and put me to sit in the cart.
"Shopping for boys is really hard."
"Tell me about it."
"Elliot said he loves you, Mommy. All the time."
"That's true."
"He loves us too!"
"That's very Right."
"So why can't we be his Christmas present?"
"What a spectacular idea."
"But how Mommy?"
"Let's see. Let's all work together to make Elliot something really special." Mommy got some clothes and put them in the cart as well.
"You're being really quiet. Are you okay?"
"Yeah."
"Hungry?"
"No."
"Tired?"
"No."
"I just don't feel like speaking. I'm not sad or angry."
"Alright, sweet pea."
"Bella said you used to call her sweet pea."
"That's right."
"Why don't you call her that anymore?"
"Because I don't know if she wants to be called that."
"She likes it when you call her that."
"Really?" I nodded and Mom did too.
"Interesting." We went back to the car and put the stuff in there. Mommy started driving back home and I was thinking of a lot of things in my head.
"What are you getting Elliot?"
"Let's see."
"Whenever you say that you're thinking of something. I don't trust you, young lady."
"Young lady?!"
"Old lady?!"
"Doesn't make it better Lei!" I giggled loudly as my Mom made a turn on the highway. Mom pulled up to our house and I got out.
"Okay, princess! Let's go inside and have some lunch."
"What's for lunch?"
"Some salad with some chicken."
"Rice!"
"You want rice too? Which kind?"
"Mexican, but how about the lettuce sandwich!"
"If that's what you want sweetheart."
"And the hot sauce! I love hot sauce!" I walked into the kitchen and saw my sister Bella licking a popsicle.
"I wanna lick."
"Here, have it."
"Hey Bells."
"Hi."
"Can we talk after lunch?"
"Sure."
"Want to help?"
"No." She went upstairs and Mommy let out a big puff of air.
"I'll help you!"
"Thanks, babe!"
************
Upstairs (Olivia's Perspective)
"Why didn't you come down for lunch?"
"I didn't know you called." Bella continued typing her essay and I watched her as she did so.
"What's wrong, Mom?" She ate the plate of food and I shook my head.
"Nothings wrong with me love. Just checking in on you."
"Why?"
"Because Fin told me something the other day. Are you okay?" My approach with Bella these days is that I don't want to pressure her into speaking to me, but rather encourage it through asking questions. And if I realize she's uncomfortable, I'll back off. It works, I think it does at least.
"Yeah."
"Heat of the moment type of thing?" Bella is more likely to talk to me if I give her that privacy, and I could tell she wasn't very comfortable.
"Yeah."
"Alright, I'm going downstairs. Do you want dessert?"
"Sure."
"Come down when you're ready. I love you."
"Love you too."
"Elliot and Noah Mommy!"
"Hey, Mom!"
"How was the trip guys?"
"Awesome! What's for lunch?" He picked up Leia as she told him all about what we cooked.
"You helped?! That's great!"
"I am great!"
"Where's Bella?"
"Upstairs resting?"
"Is she in a mood?"
"She isn't. She's tired though. But, how about we go and play a board game? Wouldn't that be nice?"
"Elliot gets to choose this time, he never chooses because we do!"
"How kind."
"How about, sorry!"
"Alright, sorry it is. Leia, come sit on my lap. You can watch us play if you want."
"Yeah, I wanna watch." She stroked my hair as we started off the game and I gave her a kiss.
"I like your hair best Mommy."
"And I like yours best."
*************
Dessert By The Fire (Bella's Perspective)
"Wanna play?"
"No thanks."
"You're so boring sometimes Bella."
"You're rather annoying sometimes Noah. Just shut up and leave me alone."
"Someone's on their period."
"How could I be on something, I haven't gotten yet? You're such an idiot."
"How was I supposed to know?"
"From your girlfriend."
"What?!" Leia said as she came into the living room.
"Leia, she's joking."
"Am not!"
"I'm going to tell Mommy!"
"Leia, if you don't say anything I'll give you a dollar."
"Two dollars."
"Okay, two." Elliot and Mom come down the stairs and looked at us.
"You guys okay?"
"No. You have some liars in this room." I put my bowl in the sink and went into the basement to be alone. I could hear them talking about me upstairs. To be honest with you, I wasn't angry about it.
"What is talking about?"
"I don't know."
"Mhm. Let's go with that. Leia, what happened while we were gone?"
"Bella and Noah talked."
"About what?"
"I don't know.."
"You don't know or you don't understand?"
"I just heard period."
"That's it?" Dang Leia is lying! I knew she loved Noah more than me.
"That's weird. Okay, I'm going to talk to Bella then." I heard the footsteps and Mom sat down right next to me.
"I heard you guys."
"I figured that. What's wrong?"
"Noah is annoying me. And you guys think I have anger issues."
"That's not true. I don't think that."
"But Fin told you."
"Because he worries. Not because he thinks that. Not in the slightest. Don't be upset darling."
"I'm not. I'm just saying how I feel." I said calmly.
"Just because I'm speaking doesn't mean I'm tired, moody, or some other emotion. This is just how I speak. I'm not angry."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. You can't be blamed."
"Bella.."
"Yeah?"
"Can you tell me about what you told Fin?"
"I barely told him anything honestly speaking. I don't think there's much to talk about."
"Your eyes are watering. What's the issue?" Mom gave me a hug and I didn't cry, I just returned the favor. Something about crying. I don't see the sense in it sometimes. Crying for what? Why cry over something stupid. I go to therapy every week. I let out my emotions there for the most part. I don't cry much anymore. Rather, my eyes just water. I'm prepared to cry, and then I bite my tongue, release, and my vision is no longer foggy. Every emotion leaves  my body.
"I'm not crying. Nothing to cry about. It's just a temporary emotion. I was just angry about something that happened at school, but I realized that it isn't the way to go about it. Thanks for the hug though." I think it makes Mom said when I self-soothe sometimes. No matter how many times she's told me that I need to be more independent, I know she loves babying me. I know she thinks I grow up on her a bit too fast. She wrote it in her journal once. The same one that she's kept since she's adopted me.