『 ʙᴇɴᴇᴀᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ sᴜʀғᴀᴄᴇ ⋙ sᴏᴘᴇ 』✔︎

𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕖𝕥𝕪 𝕥𝕨𝕠

[i double updated yesterday so make sure you've read 90 & 91 before continuing, thank u!!]

❤︎

"I can't go to the dance competition."

Hoseok replayed those words in his head on the walk home, unintentionally blurring out every single world or phrase that Taehyung was blabbering on about endlessly.

Right when those first couple of words hit Hoseok's ears, soon followed by Yoongi's explanation as to why, there was this wave of sadness that washed over him that he just wished would go away. That only added on to the guilt he felt, since he was more than understanding towards the reasoning of why Yoongi wouldn't be able to make it, especially since Hoseok himself valued family more than anything.

Those words of comfort Hoseok said to Yoongi were completely honest as well, coming straight from the heart and every inch of his entire body fully agreed with it too. In fact, it only made him feel even worse since Yoongi looked extremely devastated about the matter, which only made Hoseok heart snap in two at the sight of his usual bright eyes full of color morph into grey ones of melancholy.

And he really did try to throw away that teeny tiny bit of disappointment he felt that Yoongi said he wasn't able to go, since it only made Hoseok think of himself as nothing but a selfish snob who only cared about himself.

He hated it.

But regardless of how many times he tried to swallow it up whole or store it deep deep within the corners of his own mind into the land of the forgotten, it always managed to seek back through no matter what.

To anyone else who wasn't Hoseok, they would simply brush it off as a natural feeling to feel sad about something as casual as this.

But that wasn't like him, who always overthought every single thing in his whole entire life, from every conversation to double questioning himself before doing something as simple as asking someone for a pen during class.

It always came back to bite him in the back, even if the interaction happened days, weeks, months, or even years ago. His mind would always lead his conscious back to remembering cringey or questionable conversations, making him want to rip his hair out and hop into a rocket ship far far away from Earth.

So just the simple fact that Hoseok was distraught over something so tiny, picking at every or any possible flaw within or outside of his body, then there was no doubt that it would haunt him for the next couple of days leading up until the dance competition arrived.

Because in his mind, whether it be something as minor as forgetting to say 'thank you' to someone or insulting one of his friends as a joke, it always stuck by him days on end with nothing but guilt building up inside him.

Just the mere possibility of him being selfish drove him ballistic, hating every inch of himself for being upset over something Yoongi didn't have any control over.

In the middle of talking on and on about how apples and peanut butter go great together, Taehyung halted in the middle of the sidewalk when he realized that Hoseok hadn't even been listening to a word he was saying.

"Hoseok."

Hoseok froze, realizing that Taehyung was standing a few feet behind him on the pavement, arms crossed sternly as he sent his friend a menacing glare that filled Hoseok up with immediate worry that he had done something wrong.

Not to mention how Taehyung actually referred to him by his real name, and not by 'Hobi' or 'Seokie' like he usually did.

That was never a good sign.