SwanQueen One Shots - Book Two

Random Texts Part Tree

A/N: Bringing this back because I'm feeling lazy 😂😂 None of these belong to me, I found them and thought they were funny so I decided to share!

Robin: So you're gay?

Regina: Bi, Robin

Robin: No! Don't go, it's none of my business!

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Zelena: Why would I fuck a demon? Simple, the status. Imagine, you and your friends arriving at the gates of hell, everyone crying, scared to death and you just walk into the arms of your sugar demon. Legendary.

Snow: Where's my bible, I need to-

Ruby: No wait, she has a point

- - -

Regina: Emma, not that I don't appreciate your efforts, but where exactly did the money from this come from?

Emma: I did a thing

Regina: A thing?

Emma: Best not to talk about the thing

Regina: We'll talk about the thing later

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Ruby: It must be so nice to be rich instead of like...Having to develop a personality

Regina: Shut up.

Ruby: Buy my silence

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Killian: We're playing Scrabble. It's a nightmare

Regina: Scrabble? Scrabble's great!

Emma: Not when you're playing with Rumple. He uses words like sesquipedalian and I put dog

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Belle: Did you not have a happy childhood?

Zelena: My favourite toy was a knife, you finish the puzzle.

- - -

Snow: So let me get this straight. When you're talking about "Gina" are you referring to Regina the person or her...Um..."Gina"?

Emma: ....Depends

Regina: Nothing straight about it though

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Regina: Is something burning?

Emma: Just my love for you

Regina: Emma, the toaster is on fire

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Emma: How do you ask what a glass of water is doing?

Regina: A glass of water is an inanimate object and therefore incapable of having a thought process or understanding basic English.

Emma: Water you doing?

- - -

Regina: I’ve been dropping hints that I like her for a year now

Emma: Wow, she sounds stupid

Regina: Nah, she’s just dense

Emma: You need to be more obvious. Just say “Hey, I love you!”

Regina: That’ll work?

Emma: Yeah

Regina: Hey, I love you

Emma: Yeah, just like that!

- - -

Regina: What are you drinking?

Emma: Vodka.

Regina: Straight?

Emma: No gay.

Regina: NOT YOU THE VODKA.

- - -

A/N: Well that was that 😂😂 Hope you guys enjoyed these. I just finished writing my Fear The Walking Dead Fic if any of you would like to check that out, also I'm going to be writing a Wynonna Earp x OUAT fic so if you'd like to check that out when it's up that'd be great!