BTS Sickfics (request closed for now!)

Namjoon (RM) ~ Upset

It was a beautiful morning, the sky was blue and the sun was rising slowly. The band was in the Soop, making their time to relax. Namjoon was up early, first reading in a couple chapters in his book, waiting for one of the other boys to start making breakfast because everyone knows that he is not born to be in the kitchen.

Not if we want good food or a save environment, to say the least RM just couldn't cook and was really clumsy. So when Jin started to make breakfast Namjoon noticed that weird enough he just didn't feel like talking. He didn't mind talking at all, he loves talking to and with his brothers but today he just had a feeling. Not really sure what to feel, like you know something is wrong but you just can't put a finger on it.

"Morning." Jin says to Namjoon who looks up from his book.
"Morning." He answer trying to be just as normal as normal ignoring his weird feeling.

Maybe he was just hungry, everyone knows that if you are hungry your never been yourself. With that Namjoon waited for food. But as more members came in and even with the food that he was eating, Namjoon wasn't in the mood.

He wasn't in the mood to talk, to speak or even listen. He felt guilty he never felt this way before, he loved every member, they felt like brothers and he couldn't imagine a life without them.

"Thanks Hyung." Namjoon says bringing his plate to the kitchen, but leaving it just a little to far on the edge making it fall just as he turns around.
"RM!" The boys all laughed, he felt embarrassment just like every time that he breaks something. But he doesn't smile today. Cleaning the little pieces, even cutting himself because he is picking everything up with his bare hands.
"Joonie-Hyung, you can clean your hand I will clean this for you." Jungkook says, smiling softly.
Namjoon nods, leaving the kitchen, leaving everyone.

"Did we do something wrong?" Jimin ask the remaining boys.
"Not that I know of, why?" Hoseok asks.
"it's nothing." Jimin says, but the boys know what he means.

Meanwhile Namjoon is in his room, sitting in the chair by the closed window. He didn't open the curtains this morning so it is still dark. He puts his head in his hand.

"What is wrong with me." He softly says. Was he a bad leader? Was he a bad hyung? Why where these thoughts even entering his mind.

He couldn't sit up anymore so he just lays on the ground staring at the ceiling. Not saying anything, not doing anything, not even sleeping. His breathing was soft, he just didn't feel like himself, it felt so weird.

A knock on the door made him look up.
"Namjoon are you ok?" Jimin says rushing in towards Namjoon who was still laying on the floor. /
"I am fine, can you just leave me alone." Namjoon react bluntly, making Jimin step back.
"Sorry." With that Jimin leaves the room with tears in his eyes. Not a minute later Jin comes walking in.
"Joon that wasn't necessary, even you have to give them respect." Jin says looking mad at Namjoon, but worried as he saw him laing on the ground.

Namjoon just doesn't react now, making sure not to say something he is going to regret.
"Kim Namjoon at least give me some respect." Jin says starting to get annoyed.
"Just leave me." Namjoon says this time angry.
"What is wrong with you!" The voice of Yoongi come between the two.
"Nothing, you know. I will leave." Namjoon says standing up from the ground walking out of his room leaving the two older man in his room.

Why he was angry he couldn't place it, he didn't want to be like that in his room just know but he just couldn't help himself. He was starting to get angry at himself, he walk toward his bike and without thinking he started to ride.

Fast, if he wasn't wearing a helmet the wind would totally mess up his hair. His eyes started to tear form the wind, but also form all the emotions.

After riding for maybe more than 20 minutes he stops, looking around, for a moment he didn't know where he was. But he didn't care he would find his way back. He saw a river, he walk towards it and sat down. Listing to the water and the animals around him, finally starting to calm down. He lays down looking at the blue sky above him and then he screamed. At the top of his lungs he screamed, even harder as he stand up again and was a the edge of the water.

He felt better, he screamed and screamed for minutes not caring about the rest of the world for a whole moment. Just letting everything out, then he lays sits down a started to throw little stones in the river.

Breathing in the fresh air, the calmness and the peace.
"I am the worst brother." He than says. "Oh how I messed it up this morning."
He starts talking to himself, noticing he had left his phone is his room, so he didn't know what time it was or if he was lost how he could go home.

For now he didn't matter going home, he needed this, this place he needed a little time for himself, he needed the bike ride and more he needed to calm down alone. The time went by fast, it was starting to cool down and the sun was setting. Namjoon pick up his bike and started the ride back home. He missed a few right turns making him taking a longer round. After hours and hours being away form the dorm he came home.

"RM"
"Namjoon"
"Joonie!" all different voices where calling him now.
"what the heck did you think! You can't just disappear for hours!" Jin says angry.
"You had us worried sick! You didn't come home for lunch or diner and you didn't even have your phone with you!" Yoongi went on.
Not saying anything he looked around.

"I am sorry, I just wasn't feeling myself today. I shouldn't have treated you the way I have and I am sorry." Namjoon says looking at Jimin and then at Jin and Yoongi.

"Just don't ever do that to us again!" Jin says.

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