BTS Sickfics (request closed for now!)

Namjoon (RM) ~ Tired and sad

As most people have a 9 to 5 job, of course idols have a 24 for 7 one. It never ends, even when they are on a vacation, time of or just taking time for themselves they always will be kind of working.

It was hard.. Namjoon was sitting outside with a book in his hands but his eyes where not reading the lines. His eyes where just unfocused staring at the surrounding in front him, not really looking just starting.

His though where every where and nowhere at the same time. He was tired but didn't get a good sleep for a few days now. It was starting to warm him out, it was not like he didn't want to sleep, no. He really wanted to sleep but everytime he closed his eyes there where things he was thinking about. Him as a leader, was he really that bad? Twitter was saying it, so maybe it was true. Why was he even in the band, only because he can speak English? Was it true that he was not a good as the others, boring, ugly,...

"Namjoon hyung." Namjoon looks up to see the maknea standing in the doorframe looking at him.
"Yoongi Hyung has made some food, you wanna join us?" Jungkook ask looking at his leader. Namjoon nods his head before standing up, slowly making his way to the other members.

Sitting down he couldn't hide how tired he was, it was getting the best of him now.
"Did you even sleep last night?" Hoseok ask Namjoon as he takes a bite of the food while he shakes his head.
"Are you ok? You getting sick?" Jin ask looking at the younger man.
"No no, I am doing Fine, just a lot on my mind." Namjoon says.
"You wanna paint after eating?" Jungkook says. "We have still 2 hour before wee have to go to practice today."
For a moment Namjoon though about it, maybe he needed to paint, get his mind to rest.
"Sounds good." He says looking at his plate in front of him. The boys talk like normal and time passes by, Jungkook and Namjoon left the table after eating and went to Jungkooks room to paint. It was the room with the best light.

"How do you start with the background of the picture ou want in the front?" Jungkook ask looking at Namjoon.
"I always start with the background." He answers as he start to paint with a grey colour.

Namjoon was painting like his life was deepening on it, he loved the feeling, he felt free, getting it all out.

Jungkook was just looking at his hyung, normally he would paint but he was just noticing the different way of painting.

"I am going to get something to drink, you want some?" Namjoon looks up.
"No thank you, I take something before we go to the studio in half a hour." Namjoon says as he looks back at his painting.

Jungkooks walks out and was looking for Suga.
"Hyung?" He ask as he was standing by his bedroom door. Yoongi looks up.
"Is something wrong?" Yoongi ask, it may be hard to believe even though every member of the group is caring for each other, Yoongi is the who is the most caring for everyone. His stone look is just a way to keep other people out, but the one he loves in.

"I am worried." Jungkook says.
"That is not something you need to do."
"It's Namjoon hyung."
"I know, he seems pretty tired."
"Something is wrong."
"Let me talk to him after practice."

Jungkook nods as he and the other members, including Namjoon where getting ready for practice.

"I wouldn't mind it practice is more often this late on the day." Taehyung says as they take place in the car.
"Me either, I love the time." Jimin says, Hoseok just nods.

Practice went by quiet, they only needed to do a few songs for dancing and also a few thing need to be recorded. As Taehyung and Jimin where in the studio recording, Namjoon was sitting on the couch, he was so tired on the moment. His eye lids where getting heavy as he slowly started to fall asleep.

But nothing last forever, it felt like he only slept for 30 minutes but he just closed his eyes for not more than 5.
"You feeling ok?" Yoongi was now sitting next to him looking worried at the leader.
"I am fine." Namjoon says smiling soft.
"You seem tired."
"Ok, maybe I haven't been sleeping a lot."
"A lot? It seems like you haven't slept for days." Yoongi says, Taehyung and Jimin come out of the studio, Jimin is walking out of the studio to the bathroom as Jin and Jungkook get in the studio.
Taehyung is taking his seat next to Namjoon as he rest his head on his leader shoulder.
"It's seems like I can't catch any." Namjoon says soft to Yoongi, Taehyung just closes his eyes not wanting to disturb the conversation.
"Is something on your mind?"
"To much."
"Taehyung should be you example to sleep." Yoongi smiles as he noticed that Taehyung has indeed fallen asleep on Namjoon, that being said Taehyung is now hugging Namjoon arm.
"Yeah yeah I should." Namjoon smiles as he looks at the sleeping young man.
"You wanna talk about the things on your mind?"
"I am a good leader?"

Yoongi eyes grow big, this was not something he expected to hear. If Yoongi was honest he couldn't even think about somebody else being the leader.
"You are amazing. Nobody would be better than you." Yoongi says, the words where true but Yoongi knew that Namjoon wasn't taking it.
"I don't know why you even ask me, if I am being honest with you I couldn't think of someone better than you. you are a amazing person, sweet, caring and always there for us. You are an example for the world and you always put yourself last. I don't even know any leader on earth who does that."

"Something I just wonder if I deserve to be in BTS." Namjoon says. "Was I even in BTS if I wasn't the leader."

"No." Yoongi says, making Namjoon look up it shock. "Joonie, if you weren't our leader there wouldn't be a BTS."

"We need you." A soft voice says as the grip on Namjoon arm becomes stronger. Taehyung is now holding Namjoon even closer to him, he is still asleep, but he is hearing and interacting with the conversation.
"He is true, I don't even know how you the though came into your mind. But please shake them off, You make us BTS just like any of us makes BTS. We always have those haters who think that some people are not meant to be in this group. But without anyone of us BTS isn't BTS."

Namjoon looks up, as tears slowly escapes his eyes, he lays his head on Yoongi small shoulder as he cries soft. Finally letting it out, and slowly falling asleep.