Eleanor Snape- Book 5, Part 2

The Suicide Ward

Healer Phillips tooks me down the hall and into a room I had neer been in before. It was unbearibly white. He handed me a white hospital gown, and asked me to put it on. I was still in my cold, wet pajamas. I shook my head no, and he suggested another pair of pajamas from my room is I wasn't going to wear the gown. This time I shook my head yes, and he turned to a counter behind him, wrote something down on a piece of paper, and used his wand to send it down the hall. A few minutes later the pajamas flew in and he closed the door. He directed me to the bathroom and asked me to change. I complied, taking off my damp pants and boxers and my blood stained shirt. I put the fresh change of clothes on, and he rejoined Healer Phillips. He handed me Melvin, and asked me to sit on an examination table at he other end of the room. Unlike before, Melvin was bringing me comfort again.

"Will you unbotton the first couple buttons, please? I need to get a good look at your neck." He asked. I just looked at him blankly. I didn't really want to do that because it would reveal part of my chest. He looked at the shirt. "May I unbotton it for you?"

"Uh...huh..." I slowly shook my head. The cut on my neck was begining to hurt. He reached over and quicklly undid the buttons before pulling the collar over my shoulder, revealing bare skin. I flinched for a moment. It reminded me of right before the battle, when Vincent was taking care of me after he was forced to hurt me. Every morning he would come in and check on the giant bruise that blossomed over my collar bone, the exact same way Healer Phillips had just done. 

Blood from teh cut had dripped onto the shirt, and was now crusty with dry blood. As was my skin. 

"I need to clean this, okay?"

"Okay..." I looked down and squeezed Melvin tighter. He waved his wand and cloth came out of a cabinate. He wet it with his wand and began wiping away the blood on my shoulder. The water he used was warm and easily washed the blood.

"This may sting a little." He warned before moving to my neck. I flinched. It did hurt, but not too badly. He rubbed it and then grabbed a small vial from a drawer, along with some cotton bandages. He took the cork out of the vial and put the liquid on a new rag. "This will hurt, too. But just at first."

"Hm." I let out a small moan before I began crying again. It wasn't really because it hurt badly, becaus I had had much worse. It was because after being physically and emtionally drained, not to mention broken, it was just too much for me to handle. Basically, I was sick and tired or being sick and tired.

"Is it causing too much pain? It's almost over." He began putting the bandages on.

"No." I moved ot shake my head, but he gently grabbed it and held it still. "I just..."

"You just what? You need to hold your head still until I finish, please."

"Sorry." I weakily said.

"I'm almost finished." He assured.

I stayed quiet with the exception of my sniffing, until he finished with teh bandages. "I need ot ask you some questions now, if that's okay. Are you well enough to answer me?" 

"Do we have to do it here?" The room was a sterile kind of bright, and it was begining to make my head hurt. The exaimination table was cold and uncomfortable and everything was way too white.

"Well... Are you uncomfortable here?"

"Yes." I bit my lip as I began to tear up again. 

"Well... It's hospital policy that I keep you here over night to watch over, but I suppose if you will be more comfortable having your examination somewhere else, that can be arranged, as long as you come back here for tonight. Would you like to go back to my office for now? Would you be more comfortable there?" 

"Yeah... but why do I have to come back here?"

"Because it's hospital policy. I told you that."

"But... where exactly am I?"

"Well..." He hesitated. That made my heart skip a beat. Why didn't he want to tell me? 

"You... you have to tell me where... I am..."

"You're in the Suicide Ward, Mrs. Malfoy."

"I... what...?"

"You just tried to kill yourself. It's Hospital Policy that you are put on Suicide Watch for atleast twenty-four hours, or more if you show signs of another episode."

"I....I just..." I didn't know how to respond, so instead I began crying again. 

"It's okay. That's why I am re-evaluating you. I know it's upsetting to you, but you want help, yes?"

"Uh-huh..." I sniffed. I did. An hour ago I wanted to die, but now I wnated to live more than ever... Except depression and axiety was still choking me and sitting on my chest. I covered my face.

"Come on, we are going to talk about it, okay? It'll make you feel better."

"Oh... okay..." I mumbled, trying to wipe tears out of my eyes. I wasn't really sure talking about what had just happened would help, but if he said it would, it would, right? He said he would help me.

"Good, then let's go." He offered a warm smile, then lead me out the door. As I walked into the hallway, a gasp sounded from the left .I looked over, and saw Ivy. She was covering his mouth, and her eyes were wide. We locked eye for a couple moments, making my anxiety shoot up. I felt ashamaed. Dirty. Terrible. 

I had to tear away. I closed my eyes, tight.

Ignore her. I should just ignore her.

"Mrs. Malfoy?" Healer Phillips questioned. I shook my head no and kept my eyes closed for a couple more minutes before reopening them. Ignoreing Healer Phillips, I looked back down the hallway. To my relief, Ivy was gone.