"I love you god knows I do but I can't do this. I can't. I put up with the phone calls, the text messages, social media, random chicks, not coming home, and everything else. Let alone a baby you conceived by some random chick. I'd be a fool to marry...
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Chapter 4: I'll Hold You Down {Chris} I had some problems back home (so I heated up) I ain't with that bullshit at all (then I laid it down) Maybe it's that Virginia in me (nigga say something) Have a young nigga go so hard Oh but through it all you stuck with me Through it all you never ducked off like a coward when he hit me Get me? Girl I swear to God you the real one and you know it And I don't hurt anyone of ya'll for the real one and you know it And I hold it down [Hold You Down: DJ Khaled ft. Various Artist]
Breakfast was eaten in silence. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of them eating as their utensils scraped along their plates. Chris didn't mind the silence and didn't want to hear Kae's voice after she called his heart out of her name especially when she didn't know shit about her. Bet your wondering why he called the one that got away his heart when all he did was break her down and fuck her over time and time again. Well it's simple. She's the only one who has ever had and still has his heart wholeheartedly and since she's been gone there's been a void there but he couldn't complain. He brought it on himself. She did no wrong. Wait a minute he lied she did. She enabled him even if she didn't know it. She gave him way too many chances to walk over her instead of putting her feet down from jump. What did Chris do? He continued to walk right over her. She made it too easy but it was Chris who didn't know that she was desperately fighting to win his love back. Something that she never lost but he never cared to show her that he was still down for her and in love with her.
His baby girl Royalty was the straw that broke the camel's back. He had a whole baby on her. His blood running through her veins while April's blood was nowhere in the formula or DNA sequence. She tried to stick around and act like the whole ordeal didn't fuck her up but it did. It crushed her. He knew it did especially after they had their pregnancy scare. April wanted a baby so bad and at the time he didn't so while she was excited he just couldn't fathom it nor did he think they needed a baby at the moment but when his daughter's mother popped up pregnant and he heard his baby's heart beating like a little warrior he was already in love with her. Mind you he didn't even know if baby girl was even his until he had actually taken a DNA test. To this day he still didn't know what happened with April's pregnancy scare. He didn't know if she was pregnant, miscarried, or if it was a false alarm. At the time he didn't want to hear shit about it so he left the subject alone and ignored it and her leaving her to deal with whatever the outcome was by herself. So he knew once his baby girl came into the picture it killed his heart no matter how strong she tried to be.
Throughout it all that girl held him down through all of his wrongdoings. Well that woman. When the world put a target on his back she was there along for the ride holding shit down even when people were calling her all types of names for staying with a nigga like Chris; A nigga that did nothing but disrespect her and dog her out. He fucked up and now he could finally admit it. He let the best thing in his life besides his daughter walk away without a fight. He honestly didn't want to fight for her because he knew she needed someone who could truly love her and treat her better than he had ever. They say if you love someone you should let them go and that's what he did. He wanted better for her. She deserved better. Would he like to shoot his shot again? He damn sure would but he wouldn't unless he absolutely had his shit together and right now he didn't. Chris didn't like being alone and although Kae was around and he enjoyed her company they both knew what it was at the end of the day. He couldn't fully commit to her when his heart belonged to someone else. Before you comment she knows this already. Besides she's just looking for publicity so it's a win, win for the both of them until shit goes left. According to Chris he's out before it even goes that way. But what happens if it's too late.
