"I love you god knows I do but I can't do this. I can't. I put up with the phone calls, the text messages, social media, random chicks, not coming home, and everything else. Let alone a baby you conceived by some random chick. I'd be a fool to marry...
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Chapter 79: Bring Me to Life April
How can you see into my eyes like open doors? Leading you down into my core, where I've become so numb Without a soul, my spirit's sleeping somewhere cold Until you find it there and lead it back home(Wake me up) Wake me up inside (I can't wake up) Wake me up inside (save me) Call my name and save me from the dark [Bring Me to Life: By Evanescene]
Entering the bedroom Dave placed Charlie in her bassinet making sure to tuck her in while April went straight to the bathroom to start the shower. Dave gave April a few minutes to herself before he joined her. You know letting her get a little me time. She looked to be in deep thought and he wondered what was on her mind.
"Mind if I pick ya brain" Dave asked bringing her out of her thoughts. She had been standing there starring at nothing in particular just going with the motions as if she was on autopilot. For whatever reason he didn't like the way she had spaced out.
April moved out of the way letting him get some shower time. "I'm just thinking bout everything that's been going on and how things are different now" she replied.
"What bout what's going on and what's different" he questioned as he showered.
"This time last year I was single as fuck. You and I were no more, I was in a bad head space, and just didn't feel like me anymore. I had finally talked to Chris so we were mending our friendship and I was getting to know Royalty all over again. I might make it look easy but getting close to Chris again was hard but I knew I needed to let go and move on for my own sanity" she started pretty much from the beginning of when things started to shift for her.
"My relationship with Trey was hanging on by a thread. I was in a dark place still stunting like everything was ok but luckily I started going to therapy because I was going to snap and not any regular snap either. I had so much built up anger, hurt, and pain and before I started getting help all I did was place band aid after band aid over all of my scars. I was a walking wound. I honestly felt like if I didn't snap on someone then I'd do some shit to myself" April admitted and leaned against the shower wall thinking about how everything would've changed if she would've jumped off the ledge. She didn't stop there though she continued to speak her mind.
"That's one of the main reasons why I didn't fuck Millie up the day I left you. That's why I picked up my gun to just get it over with because if I would've fought her and put my hands on her then it would've been bad. She literally would've gotten her ass killed for all of my built up frustrations and everything that I had been through and was going through. I was at my limit that day"
Dave immediately turned around and gave her his full attention. He knew she had been through some shit but he didn't know that she thought about harming herself. This was the first time he had ever heard her say anything like that. He didn't want to think that she would do the extreme. April didn't look the type to harm herself but he also knew that it was always the people you least expect. He didn't even give a fuck what she said about Millie he just wanted to know what was on her mind so he could make sure that whatever it was, was over and gone. This was something he damn sure wouldn't let her try to face on her own.
