"I love you god knows I do but I can't do this. I can't. I put up with the phone calls, the text messages, social media, random chicks, not coming home, and everything else. Let alone a baby you conceived by some random chick. I'd be a fool to marry...
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Chapter 46: I Need This April
Stop, where am I, Shock, I can't cry Pop, I need some space No, this isn't me Oh, please let me breathe I'll be back sooner than you know I need this space just like you need air I need this time, time to clear up my mind Wait, did you hear that? Sh Hear my heart beat? Sh I need this feeling, whoa yeah, I really need this [I Need This: Chris Brown]
Relaxed, fresh out the tub and shower April dried off, and made her way to the bed skipping putting on lotion for the night or putting on any sleepwear. She was tired and hungry but food had to wait sleep was calling her name. As soon as she lay in bed and buried herself up under the covers and her head hit the pillow it was supposed to be lights out or so she thought. Her mind was filled with nothing but Dave as she tossed and turned as her stomach growled. It was at that very moment that she knew the sandman wouldn't be visiting her tonight.
April got out of bed, put lotion on, and slipped into a long black silk nightie with the matching silk robe. She made sure it was secure and headed out the bedroom and downstairs to the kitchen. Shit she was woke she mind as well feed herself. April grabbed a bowl of fresh fruit that she had cut up earlier, put some in a smaller bowl, and once she was done she headed back outside the house and took a seat on the outside daybed. That had become her favorite spot.
April sat up snacking on her fruit as she listened to the water crash back and forth against itself. The sky lit up with millions of stars and the lights outside her place made it feel relaxing yet romantic. Oh how she wished she was laid up in someone's arms sharing this perfect moment with them. But as soon as the thought popped up in her head she quickly dismissed it. She felt like she needed to talk to someone. You know someone who would listen to everything she had to say and take away the constant and nagging reminder that she and Dave were no longer together. She wanted to talk to someone who would make her laugh and distract her.
April knew just who to call and was happy she had grabbed her phone at the last minute. Just as she was about to hit his contact to FaceTime him she sighed and shook her head. April didn't want to get into the habit of running to Chris whenever she was seeking happiness, laughter, or even a clear head no matter how significant their friendship was. She didn't want to depend on him in that way even though she knew she could call him for anything and he would always be there. That was one of the ways he had eased his way into her life the first time around. Placing her phone down April looked up at the night sky and took a deep breath low key mad at the world but she was going to be alright. She was going to make it. Shit took time but she was eventually going to get there. One day her heart would repair itself and be completely healed and that was something she couldn't wait for.
"What's on ya mind shawty doo wop" her uncle NyReek said as he lay down beside her swiping a piece of fruit along the way.
April looked at him and gave him a small smile. He was head of her security team and wanted to be there for her during this trip since she was traveling alone. "You mean who" she chuckled.
