Skyrim Dovah One Shots

Maybe pranks aren't the best thing Alduin x Reader x Paarthurnax

indoraptorpurpura 

Y/n Pov,

"Brother, do you really think that we can trust the Dovahkiin? I know she is perilous," Alduin inquired as he stood behind Paarthurnax.

"Yes Alduin, Y/n can be trusted, I promise," Paarthurnax spoke as he opened the door to my home.

I could hear Alduin and Paarthurnax speaking to each other as they into my home. I walk downstairs and see Alduin investigating the room around the front of my house. Paarthurnax pulled Alduin by the collar to his armor and pulled him closer to him.

"Y/n..." Alduin huffed as he crossed his arms.

"Al, how nice of it to see you."

"It's Alduin, not Al... You know this," Alduin whined before Paarthurnax backhanded him in the back of his head.

"Paarthurnax! How great it is to see you," I cheered as I turned to Paarthurnax and went over to hug him.

"What? Why does he get a warm welcome but all I get is hey Al?!?!"

"Well he didn't try to destroy the world last I checked," I chuckled as I was enjoying Alduin's little rouse.

Alduin only acts like a child and he crosses his arms and makes a pouty expression. Paarthurnax just smiles as he takes a seat at the table. I follow Paarthurnax's action and take a seat at the table then Alduin takes a seat but far away from Paarthurnax and me. My housecarl walks in with a plate full of goat legs, wine, and a few bowls of soup.

"Thanks Lydia, you can go off now."

"Yes my Thane," Lydia said as he began to head for the door.

"So Alduin... How has your life been since you haven't been destroying the world?" I ask as I take a bite out of the goat leg.

"Mmmhhmmm... Ah excuse me... I meant to say was that I despise it. All the love of the world is just blinding. Too bright and stuff." Alduin responded as he was clearing his throat.

"Ya I agree the world is too bright. All those bright flowers that bloom every spring. Love really is meaningless. Why waste all that effort just to die some day?" I said as I pretended to agree with Alduin.

"Oh make fun of the man who thinks for himself." Alduin sarcastically muttered as he crossed his arms.

I just chuckle to myself as I watch the scene play out before me. Paarthurnax only looked slightly embarrassed by his brother's behavior. I look at Paarthurnax who was just playing with his fork as he watched his brother. Alduin was still sitting in his chair having his little tantrum because we were picking on him.

Later that night,

"Dovahkiin!" Alduin shouted as he woke up in the middle of the lake.

"Oh my Talos," I manage to make before I tip over from me laughing at Alduin.

"Ya... ya laugh it up Dovahkiin!" Alduin shouted as he tried his best not to fall into the water.

This only made me laugh harder. I didn't care that it was the middle of the night. It took Alduin over an hour to finally reach land with him only falling in twice. When Alduin reached the shore line I was near in tears because I was laughing too hard. I couldn't look Alduin in the face because it only made me laugh harder. I would occasionally see Paarthurnax who was standing in my library tower looking around and watching me. I was snapped back to reality when I felt a hard slap I the back of my head from an old friend of mine Ahzira.

"Get it together you fool," Ahzira said before walking away.

"Thanks Ahzira!" Alduin shouted as he watch the short Khajiit walk away and disappear into the woods.

The next day,

"So Y/n how was your night planning your next prank?" Alduin muttered in his usual sarcastic tone.

"Oh tons of fun, the next one might involve a pie in your face. But who knows maybe a saber cat cub." I respond as I have my nose deep into a book of pranks.

"As if I would fall for a simple pie in the face trick." Alduin scoffed as he walked away from me planning the next plan of attack.

Two hours later,

"Dovahkiin! How in the world did you make a trap to where only I could trigger it?!" Alduin shouted from the trophy room.

"Paarthurnax doesn't quite have the same walking style as you. His mass isn't like yours?"

"Did you just call me fat?" Alduin inquired in a sarcastic hurt tone.

"Now why would I call the World Destroyer fat? I cackle as Alduin gave his usual 'you just insulted my great ancestors' face.

Part burn and walks into the room and when he looks at Alduin he casually walks out as if he didn't see anything.