More Espresso Less Depresso

Us

It's 4am and I'm currently in my bed alone crying. Not the small weeps, the crying were you have to cover your mouth with your hand and scream into the pillow. The cry that consumes your body and all you can feel is cold the only warmth you feel is the tears steaming down your cheeks into the palm of your hands. The cry were your stomach turns and feels like you've been punched repeatedly in the stomach. All the built up pain just comes out and consumes you completely while you cry. I do deep heavy breathes squeezing my eyes shut hoping that no one would hear me. I hear a small knocking on the door and ignore it but the knocks get loud I wipe my eyes and breathe trying to collect myself "Go away." the person doesn't go away they continue knocking. I throw myself around in my bed as if I was a toddler, I calm down "I'm sleeping go away." the person stops for a second and then starts knocking with both hands. I get up wiping my eyes looking into the mirror, I make sure it was completely dark and open the door. I see a sleepy Five with messy hair and a tired face.

 I cover my face with the door for a second "What? It's like 4am." his face softens and he reaches for the door, I take a step back. He walks up to me and holds my face with his nice, soft, delicate hands and strokes it with his thumb. "What's wrong?" I shake my head and he sadly moves his hand away from my face. "Nothing, I'm fine just an allergic reaction." we look at each other and I feel a tear run down my cheek and I pretend it didn't happen. He wipes my tear away not ignoring it, "No you aren't so now tell my why you're crying at 4am?" I shrug walking to my bed and sitting down patting the spot next to me. He walks over sitting down starring at me.  "We broke up." he smiles a bit but then goes back to being serious "When." I shrug thinking "Remember when I came home like 3 months ago and I threw a toilet plunger and cleaner at you?" he laughs nodding 'yes' "That's the day after we had broke up." he strokes my hair thinking "Okay, but why didn't you tell me sooner?" I shrug looking away at the dresser. "I was ashamed of it for some odd reason and plus I didn't want to bother you." 

he pulls my chin lightly so I'll stare at him, we hold eye contact  "You could never bother me. Why'd you two break up?" I bit my lip trying not to cry as I felt the tears prickle at my eyes and look away wiping them. "He, uh, yeah he cheated on my." I look back at him to see him wide eyed looking at the dresser. "With who?" I look at the dresser as well "Lila my bestfriend. Well, not my bestfriend anymore but at the time yeah." I awkwardly look between him and the dresser. "I'm sorry." he whispers out rubbing his neck, I laugh a bit "The worse part is, she got pregnant and they are getting married soon." my voice cracks and I look away putting my head on my shoulder. He grabs me pulling me into a hug, rubbing my head nicely. I always had a crush on Five ever since we met but I knew that I didn't deserve him and he deserves better than me, plus he's never dated anyone before so why would he go for me. "I don't even know why I thought I could finally deserve love. I don't deserve to have love, or a soulmate." I nuzzle deeper into his chest but he pulls my away to look me in the eyes. 

He places his hands on my cheeks, "You deserve flowers on your doorsteps and coffee in the morning, you deserve notes left on your dashboard and ice cream sundaes at 3 a.m. You deserve honesty every day and to be kissed every hour. You deserve to be reminded how beautiful you are and if you let me I'll show you love every day, I promise." we stare at each other and I could tell he was slightly nervous and flustered. I nod 'yes' quickly causing him to laugh laying down in my bed, "For now, let's cuddle, let's sleep in and then have breakfast maybe lunch. Let's just be us and live like that." I laugh a bit slowly crawling into the bed "Since when did the Five Hargreeves become such a softy, poety person?" I place my head on his chest and hear his heart beating. "You just bring out that side of me." soon enough we fell asleep in each others arms.