Matters | JENSOO

The Corridor

After the class was over, Jisoo asked Lisa and Taehyung to go first. Lisa understood what she meant and she dragged Taehyung away with her.

"Jennie can I talk with you for a second?" Jisoo called Jennie in the corridor. Her heart was beating so fast, felt like it was going to jump out of her chest.

She looked to Rosé, who was with Jennie, "Hi Rosé." she said apologetically to her. Rosé didn't answer. Her stare was so intimidating, Jisoo felt like running away. But she stayed unmoving, waiting for Jennie's answer.

"Rosie, you go ahead. I'll join you soon." Jennie finally said.

Rosé hesitantly left them. She gave Jisoo a final warning look, Jisoo felt her already sunk heart now sank even deeper. She's scavenging for little courage that still left inside her.

"Hi, Jennie, It's Jisoo." she said nervously when it was only the two of them. She couldn't understand herself. She felt nervous and sad, but being with Jennie and talking to her like this somehow made her feel electrified.

"I have no time to talk bullshit with you." Jennie's voice was flat and cold.

"Right. I.. I just want to say I'm sorry that I-" she didn't know what she did, so she said, "that I made you cry."

A sudden blush appeared on Jennie's cheeks. So Lisa had told her about that night. She was embarrassed that Jisoo knew that she cried because of her, that she had the power to do that to her; but on the other hand, she wanted Jisoo to know that she was hurt. She wanted her to make it right even though she didn't know how and why that even mattered to her.

Jennie stayed silent. She wasn't sure what to answer.

"I am pretty sure I offended you somehow.. but," Jisoo took a deep breath, "can you please tell me what I did to you? Did I do something inappropriate to you? I really am sorry.." There was a hint of fear and guilt in her voice. Her heart beat even faster now, Jisoo didn't know how she hadn't passed out yet.

Jennie still hadn't said anything. She took a quick glance at Jisoo. Jisoo looked stressed out, her eyes were pleading and Jennie could see how this meant a lot to Jisoo. But she couldn't bring herself to talk to her.

"Jennie.." Jisoo called her. Her voice was hoarse. Jennie felt a lump in her throat. It still felt the same to her whenever Jisoo called her by her name, she tried to brush the thoughts away from her head.

"Why does that even matter?" Jennie cleared her throat, trying her best to sound unbothered.

There was confusion in Jisoo's eyes, "It doesn't matter?"

"It doesn't." Jennie said coldly.

"So we're still friends?" Jisoo's voice was week. She was full of hope.

Jennie still felt the hurt from Jisoo's words that night. Felt like it was stabbing her over and over.

"We never were." She said, finding it hard to see Jisoo right in the eyes.

"I don't want you." Jennie threw Jisoo's own words back at her, will it hurt Jisoo the way it hurt her?

Jisoo's ears were ringing, she suddenly felt like she's pushed into the water where she couldn't see anything, she couldn't breathe. Her heart which was beating too fast, now felt like it stopped beating the second she heard Jennie said that. She couldn't move for a while. She couldn't bring herself to look at Jennie so she looked down.

It took a while, finally she gave Jennie a weak smile and with her soft voice she said,

"Sure. I understand. I shouldn't.. I am sorry to bother you. And taking your time. It's.. I thought I was.. a friend."

All Jisoo could feel was the ache in her heart.

Jisoo was like an open book to Jennie right now. She could see the pain on Jisoo's face. The words did hurt Jisoo the way it hurt her. Suddenly she wanted to take back her words, but it was too late. Jisoo had walked away from her. Her small steps were taking her away from Jennie, leaving her alone in her regret.

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