Matters | JENSOO

Wanting more

Warm skin engulfed her dry palm as Jennie's tiny hand fit perfectly into her grip. Jisoo suddenly forgot how to breathe.

She found that Jennie's soft skin tickled; not only where it made contact, but it tickled all over her body, on every inch of her aroused skin. Jisoo felt a familiar surge of that peculiar tug in her chest, close to her warmed heart.

It was too familiar; the sensation that came like a flood only whenever Jennie was around. But the contact intensified the sensation by millions; and it was suffocating her.

Strangely, she was too intoxicated by the sensation to the point she wanted more. Oh Lord, does she need more...

She tried to take a deep breath, but every inhale was a series of staggered attempts. Gently, she squeezed Jennie's hand; a sudden burst of butterflies danced wildly inside her stomach. She grasped it tighter, how could she found both her strength and weakness in Jennie's delicate hand?

"Jennie... Forgive me," she finally managed to say, still looking down to where she locked her hand with hers, "Stay with me for a while."

Still avoiding her gaze, she briefly tugged Jennie closer to her; her heart was racing as she waited for her to accept her invitation.

"I'm dying to spend time with you... Please... Tonight..."

Jennie still didn't move, it worried her.

Will she leave?

"You can pour out your rage on me. Talk about anyone you want. Fight me for the rest of the night. I don't care, Lord do I care? I apologize for what I did. Just... Jennie please..."

She squeezed her hand again, trying to ignore the overwhelming sensation that came with it.

It's soft.

I want more.

"Jennie..." she whispered her name and finally she built up the courage to look at her in the eye.

She was relieved when she found no disappointment nor anger in her eyes; in fact, she found vulnerability. Where has the hostility gone? It was too weak, our heart are too weak for each other.

Is that a longing I read on her face, or does this feeling belong to me?

"Please don't leave me." She tried to reach out to her heart, "Spend the night with me. Please."

With her small steps, Jennie floated back to where she sat a moment ago. Her eyes were still fixed on Jisoo's, raking over every parts of her face; from her pleading eyes, to her messy hair, her jawline, her rosy cheeks down to her lips. It stayed there.

Her heart-shaped lips.

She wonders how it tastes like.

Everything about Jisoo was pleasing to her eyes.

She never thought she would be this easy; she never was this easy. It only took the other girl a hand that holding and lips that begging; and she fell for it. Completely. Her heart was throbbing hard inside her chest; she was wondering if it would go malfunction if it kept racing at this pace.

She was itching to touch her like Soojoo touched her. She was willing to give Jisoo not only her hand, but everything else she'd ask for; because her own heart ask for more. It had been asking for more for too long. Can't Jisoo tell?

She said Soojoo doesn't make her feel; do I make her feel? Is that why she was so careful not to touch me?

Because it feels like my heart is already exploding just by a gentle squeeze of her hand on mine. How can I handle more?

Still, she wanted more.

"I'll stay."

So she stayed. After all, this tension she had inside of her was initiated by her deprivation of Jisoo's attention. Now that she was here, begging her to stay; all those fucking money she had spent, all those miles she had traveled, all the patience she had stretched out while waiting for the night to come and all the gestures from Soojoo she had granted access to her heart to make her envy; it was all worth it. Don't we have a whole night to ourselves and Jisoo all for myself?

She felt Jisoo's eyes on her; the most intense one she ever gave. Her gaze fell on her lips for a while and it seemed like the girl was lost there. Jisoo let her eyes explored all the curves of Jennie's lips. After a while she looked up to the sky; searching for something that wasn't there.

"There's no star tonight." She said. Their hearts were connected through their inseparable hands.

But Jennie sees stars.

"Don't you feel cold?"

She feels warm.

"I was wonder -"

Jennie tugged their hands a little bit to get her attention.

Stop.
Look at me instead.
I'm a bit jealous of the starless sky tonight.

Jisoo looked back at her; to her feline eyes; and Jisoo couldn't help it, she flicked her eyes to Jennie's lips again.

She wants more.

But friends shouldn't kiss each other...
Should they?

"Did I tell you that you looked good this morning?"

"You did..."

"And you look good tonight..."

"Do I?" Jennie now found her way to interlock her fingers with Jisoo's. She brought their intertwined hands to her lap, swiping slowly on her thigh, where the back of Jisoo's palm finally rest on it. Now it was her turn to squeeze her hand. Lightly and gently. Her thumb stroke on Jisoo's skin. Jisoo felt it burning: her hand, her whole skin, her whole heart.

"You do," Jisoo's found it hard to breathe, "You're beautiful... as you always are..."

"Am I?" Jennie came as breathless as her.

Jisoo shifted closer, she swore she could hear her own throbbing heart. It was too loud in this plain night.

She was slowly leaning in towards Jennie, the girl then tugged their hands a little closer, swiping it higher across her thigh to encourage her.

More.

When she felt Jisoo's heavy breath on her face, she let out an audible sigh; as heavy as the older girl's. Her head became light, she arched her back a little bit towards Jisoo.

Closer.

She felt Jisoo's other hand now on her cheek. She instinctively rubbed her cheek gently on her hand; while feeling Jisoo's heavy breath stroking the skin of her nose, her mouth, her lips. The whiff of the older girl's desire permeated the air surrounding them. It was warm and wet. Their lips were only a whisper apart.

"Jisoo..." she whispered impatiently and closed her eyes.

***