Steal His Girl

41

The sky was gray with clouds that hid the sun. The cold wind blew in my face, and right through my coat. I hate the winter.

I hope it ends soon because I don't know how much of this weather I can take. It's so cold and windy on some days and warm and sunny on others. I swear February is so bipolar.

I have to say though, it matches my mood today. Dark and cloudy are legit my emotions right now. Don't test me hoe because I will cut you.

The things I think about in the morning. It's actually so funny.

Anyways, walking into school I rubbed my numb hands together from the cold. If I didn't get into a heated area quick, I'd lose my fingers. No joke they might actually fall off.

Oh look.. there's my thumb.

I'm only kidding but do you get what I mean? I'm going to die of extreme cold! Yes I just had to be that extra.

As soon as I stepped through the doors, I felt the heat all around me and I wasn't as cold anymore. I'm saved!

I walked up the stairs passing crowds and crowds of freshman and upperclassmen. Constant jumbled chatter filled my ears as they slowly but surely made their way to the second floor. I was just in the middle of it all trying to oh so desperately get to my locker.

I just need to get today over with. Today's the day I've been dreading. Facing Josh.

It's okay though because, we ever have to talk to each other ever again after this. I'll simply break up with him and it'll all be over.

It's just the best thing right now. I don't feel good around him anymore, if I even ever did. Something just seemed off when we first met but the attraction I felt towards him had clouded my judgement.

I put in my locker combination pulling the lock up. I took my bag off about to kneel down, getting ready to grab my things. "Ash.. can we talk?"

I immediately froze when I heard Josh's voice. I thought I was ready to face him, to finally talk to him face to face. Now that he's here right in front of me, well.. behind me, I don't know what to say.

Fear is taking over once again.

I slowly got up taking a deep breath before turning around. "Yeah, there's something we need to talk about." I gulped.

My eyes widened when I saw the black and blue marks all over his face. He had a pretty nasty looking black eye along with a bruised lip and nose. Josh had a few stitches on his forehead and jaw.

Andrew really went all out. When he said he'd teach him a lesson. He really meant it that's for sure.

"I know that's why I came all the way up here."

I crossed my arms looking down at my feet. I was unable to look him in the eye so I didn't.

"Josh..." I started.

"No let me explain." He interrupted quickly. "I didn't mean to hit you, it was an accident."

How was that an accident? I don't understand.

"I just got so angry and I just, I couldn't control my temper, and I'm just so sorry."

"I think we need to break up." I spit out. I finally found the courage to look up into his bitter blue eyes. That same anger flamed.

"What? Ashley, no!" He yelled anxiously. "I-I love you so much!"

"I just.."

"Ashley you can't do this! I don't think I'll ever be able to move on from this.." panic rose in his body as he nervously ran both hands down his face. "Please.."

"Josh you hurt me!" I screamed. "I can't do this anymore."

"I-I'll never do it again, I don't know what came over me but I can't let you go." He begged. Seeing him like this made me feel bad about breaking up with him but I don't know why.

"You've made me happier ever since my mom died.. I was so broken, but- but then I met you!" Josh stammered. I've never seen him cry before.

His face turned red, when a single tear drop rolled down his face. He covered his face with his hands, trying to hide his sadness. Seeing him break down like this tore me apart.

I know he had hit me but he was hurting inside. He needed someone right now. His mom had died about a year ago and he's going through it alone.

His brother wasn't doing too well, his dad started drinking and Josh is all alone. I can't add on to the list of pain, can I?

No, that's just cruel. I'd hate it if I had to go through something like that alone.

" You remind me so much of my mom." He confessed reaching for my hand. I didn't pull away but I didn't hold his hand. " I need you in my life. Your the only one for me."

Then why was he with Tasha?

"I-"

"Stay with me." His grip tightened and I didn't know what to do. I feel so bad for him. Maybe I'll just wait it out. "Please?"

Say no. Say no. Say no.

"F-fine." I blurted out. My freaking mouth has a mind of its own. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!

All you had to say is no! You don't even like him ashley!

In that moment he had put a lot of pressure on me to say yes. He can't just tell me things about his dead mother. He guilted me into staying and I couldn't say no.

I'm not heartless.

I guess I'm stuck in this relationship.

He went in for a hug and I just stood there unable to move as the nauseous feeling came back worse than ever. Tears welled up in my eyes and couldn't help but feel like crap.

Im so screwed.

•••

Sorry.