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All week Josh has been getting extremely clingy towards me. When we first started dating a couple months ago this never used to happen. I'd never even see him in person unless we met up at the rink.

He'd give me my space and trust me when it came to guys, but ever since last Monday he's been showing up all over the place. It's really starting to piss me off that he can't leave me alone for five minutes.

When I'm at my locker, he's right there behind me. At every turn, he's right there. After school, he wants to walk with me. He's been face timing and texting me nonstop. Making sure that he knows about everything that I'm doing.

It's like he thinks I'm constantly around Andrew about to do something I'm not supposed to do. Oh please, sweetie that's you with Tasha. If I were to "cheat" on you, I would've done it already.

At first I felt bad for him but this is just getting ridiculous. Honestly he needs to back up a couple feet because I feel so suffocated. I should've just gotten rid of him but I was just a petty little wimp.

I've tried multiple times to break up with him when he occasionally lashed out on me but, he either got angry or started telling me about his dead mother and how he couldn't live without me.

Looking back on it now that's total BS! I need to just get it over with. While everyone is busy silently praying for a boyfriend on Valentine's Day(tomorrow), I'm desperately trying to find a way to get rid of mine.

My Valentine's Day plans still stand however. I'm not buying anyone but myself chocolates. Even if I'm still stuck with this horrible freshman, I'm staying in. I'm not going anywhere.

Josh wanted to take me out tomorrow but I gladly refused. I'm going to spend my day in my pajamas with loads of chocolate. Sounds good to me.

Honestly I need to build up the courage to end this unhealthy relationship. I hate being around him. I hate when he talks to me or tries to hug me or kiss me. I'm just so afraid that he'll hit me or get angry if I resist.

I absolutely hate when he calls me everyday after school. Don't get me wrong I'm pretty big on face time, but he ruins it. This kid calls me just to rant about hockey and to check up on me.

When he calls it's not for an hour or so, it's for three or more freaking hours that I don't have! I try to say no and he blows up on me. Automatically assumes I'm with Andrew and accuses me of cheating.

What is the matter with him? Is he that low?

I'm not looking forward to seeing my watch dog today. Sometimes if I'm not in school he'll ironically stop by my house.

Like, I thought he had no ride, how is he getting places?

I can see that he's afraid to lose me, but nothing's changed, except for the fact that he's grown angrier and more obsessive. I'm afraid that any day now he'll do something to me and it terrifies the crap out of me.

Why am I so stupid? Why didn't I stand up for myself?

   Why the heck did I ever believe this was my fault?

                                      •••

     I got into my baggy Victoria secret pink sweat pants and a Hollister t-shirt wrapping myself in a blanket. It's now Valentine's Day and we both know what that means. Netflix and chocolate!

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