Cover- 8/10 It was a simple cover, not too impressive though. It was catchy, and quite honestly, it basically portrayed the story. I've honestly never been a big fan of face claim covers but I literally loved the color combinations used in it.
Title- 8/10 'Alexia's Story', is a good title, sums the whole story up in 2 words, but it CAN be a bit more creative, tell me if you disagree, cause your story is way higher than your title. Think about it, will you :)
Blurb/description- 8/10 I liked the blurb, but then again, I like everything that is simple. The blurb kinda hooked me, But when I read the story, I couldn't find any connection between the story and the blurb. Like, I don't honestly get why you used that 'blood stained her hands' line, cause it gives a negative aspect for a story you seem to put in the teen fiction genre because the literal meaning of this phrase technically means that your protagonist has committed a crime. Please change that. Rest of it? It's perfect!
Creativity/Originality- 8/10 I like your story's idea. The amusing thing was that instead of the 'bad-boy' thingy, you made your female protagonist the 'Queen Bee' as everyone calls it. This can be seen only in some stories nowadays. I also like the fact that you did not make it the basic cliche normal love stories are, so, you don't need intelligence to decipher what I'm saying right now! Your story's creativity and originality are top-notch!
Plot/flow- 16/20 Yeah, this is something where this story is lacking a bit. The main reason for this is that in some chapters, you show too many different pov's even if you have given a disclaimer. That you know kind of weakens the smoothness of the story's flow. You can try writing in the 3rd person's view if you wanna show diverse thoughts. The rest of your flow was smooth as butter, no kidding. Coming to your plot, it's a nice plot, with a girl who goes to a new school and all that, but many things are a bit confusing here. Many questions arise as to who came from where, how are they here, who are they to the protagonist. There isn't much clarity sometimes. One more thing that doesn't fit right to ME is that Alexia's sisters are just 13, and...I don't know maybe I'm being a bit orthodox, but I can't see how their dad allowed them to go to a party...The things they don't match up to their age. If they were 15, then that would've been different. Anyway, that's MY thought, please don't be offended. That's all I have to say, although there were many impressive parts as well!
Character development- 8/10 I don't have much to say about the character development, cause it was up to the mark. You've shown everything almost clearly, and at every stage, there was something new popping up about some characters, which piqued interest as well. Just, the names were very confusing, being the reason I deducted a mark, and the reason I deducted another mark, lemme tell you. You see, you've made Alexia the 'not-likable yet likable' character, or so was the impression on ME, and while you were trying to portray that, Alexia's greys overpowered her bright sides. 'Till where I'VE read honestly, she's rarely been shown as someone inspirational, and I, being a person, always search for inspiration in the characters of the story I'm reading. I get that she has a dark past, which again is common in all the stories, but that doesn't mean she'll let that dark consume her now, right? Every person, with a past especially, is an inspiration on their own because they show that they have overcome it and are now happy. With your protagonist, I really can't understand whether her basic nature is like this, or whether it's because of past happenings. I request you to work on Alexia because that is required. And rest, I told ya already that the character development for others was impressive ;)
Writing style, grammar, etc- 8/10 While I was reading this story, I could feel everything. No literally, the tension in the air when Alexia was in the hospital, the strong ego-clash between both of the 'Queen Bees', everything. That was something that won my heart, because your writing style, my child, made me FEEL, which is the most vital aspect of writing. I'm inspired, really. Now, I DM'd you while I was reading, that there were some phrases, or maybe they were exclamations, which were NOT in English. Although you have translated at many places, you left many places too! Please re-check once. Now (AGAIN), there are very few grammatical mistakes here and there, very few. I'll suggest you re-read your story once! But hun, you won my damn heart by the way you write ^-^
Genre relevance- 9/10 Yoohoo, because this book IS teen fiction! Ok, I'll stop joking around, but really, I love how you've shown many things related to teenage problems, the major one being where Alexia was drugged because there ARE people out there capable of doing that. Also, at the party where Jess (I hope I'm getting the names right) was manipulated and coaxed by that 'cute boy' is also highly realistic. Your story is a good interpretation of the many problems teens should be careful about, and I appreciate it, once again. Now I cut 1 mark because of the few points I mentioned above, but rest all, I extensively admire how well you've brought the story to life.
Reader's enjoyment- 9/10 Boom! Overall I liked the story a lot, and aside from the few points I found a bit...not so good, if it makes sense, I really enjoyed the story! I was completely hooked throughout the chapters I read, and I was never like, 'God, when will this end'. And lemme tell you, even after reading it to my limit, I kept thinking about it, and about how I as a writer could adapt and learn many things from your style. The best part of the story was the vibe it gave off and the feelings it poured, and that literally won me. Yes, I AM gonna say this again and again. Your writing style won me :)
Overall- 82 /100 I'm happy I got to review your book, cause YOU, dear writer, inspire me to write more fully! I enjoyed the book throughout, and although some things cannot be overlooked, they sure can be improved, right?
Keep writing like this, Luv, and I'll pray that you become a great writer one day! But please do see the points I've mentioned, they'll just help you!
And I'll always end with this - The zeal your story portrayed, the zeal of you wanting to write your heart out, will one day become the identity of your words, trust me. And never, I mean NEVER, get disheartened by the criticism you get. Take it as constructive criticism and try to prove me wrong. Yes, dear, you HAVE to prove me wrong where I pointed some things out.
Lots of good wishes! _Yara
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