SCRIPTURIENT REVIEWS | OPEN

❄ NO FAIRYTALE FOR US︱SARA ❄

Reviewed by: Anusara12
Title: No Fairytale for us 
Author: AlateSchmetterling

Cover: 9/10
The Cover was beautiful! I really love it. It is just so neat and gives us the exact picture of the story. There were only two names mentioned in the cover, Yara and Ava, who happens to be the protagonist. The pictures with each word of the title are the dreams of the main characters of the book. I just loved how you managed to portray them in the cover beautifully.

Title: 10/10
The title couldn't be more accurate. I loved it! The drama, friendship, heartbreaks and people trying to find themselves in that journey definitely doesn't sound like a fairytale.

Blurb/Description: 4/10
It was good but is it enough to pull the readers in? I don't really know. When people read the blurb, they only see a few conversations and a poem. They don't really get the idea what the book is about, other than that they are just a couple of seventeen year old figuring out their life.

So, I would suggest you try to reduce the number of conversations to one or two at the most or just add a single line quoted either by Yara or Ava. It would be neat and attractive for the readers. Try to expand more on what the story revolves around.

Creativity and originality : 6/10
The plot was kinda cliche, especially Oliver and Yara's history. You know, forced marriage and how they fall out just because of misunderstanding. If you take Mel and Ava's story, it is kinda unbelievable, you know, the connection that they just made by looking at each other. Not because I don't believe in the love at first sight thing but because Ava doesn't seem like the person who would fall for a person instantly.

Plot and Flow: 16/20
The plot was great and I liked it very much though it is kinda cliche. I love cliches, so I'm not complaining. The flow could've been better. I kinda got confused at some points because of the point of view changes and timeline, other than I loved it.

Character Development: 6/10
I loved how you developed Yara's character. She was the closed off one and became the bold one towards your last update which is a great thing. The change was gradual and wasn't rushed. Though I got confused because at the very start, Yara was very much open to Ava and welcomed her into her friend circle but was mentioned as the closed off one in one chapter when Yara and Myra (i guess?) interacted.

About Ava, I didn't get to see much difference, maybe because till the latest update, the main focus was about Yara. I felt like all the male characters were somewhat similar. I wasn't able to differentiate between them much. Try to add some unique character for them or at least the way they talk. For instance, Ava has a tendency to make new words like 'backest' but as the story went on I noticed that all the characters make up different words that aren't an actual word.

Writing style, Grammar, spellings, etc.: 7/10
Your writing style is reallyyyyy unique and I kinda enjoyed it. It was really fun to read and I liked the way you expressed the emotions by emphasising a word. There weren't many grammatical or spelling errors that I noticed but I would suggest you proofread the chapters before publishing it.

Genre relevance: 10/10
Your book really had the hint of romance and teen fiction genre.

Reader enjoyment and Communication with the readers: 8/10
I liked your book, but there was something missing in your story that I am not obsessed with or totally in love with. Maybe because there wasn't a strong history for the characters or the history wasn't explained much. For instance, we don't know much about Yara and Effie's past or Ava's past in London.

Overall: 76/100
It is a great and fun read for those who love romance books. It just needs some tweaking here and there, so that the readers will fall in love with your book and not just like it. A little bit work on the character and the blurb will make the book even more interesting, unique and exciting for the readers. I'm sure you will make the needed changes while you're editing. Really sorry for the extremely late review. Keep writing! I will be waiting for an update. All the best!