SCRIPTURIENT REVIEWS | OPEN

❄ HIDER OR SEEKER? | FARAH ❄

Reviewed by: LyricalFlaws

Book title: Hider or Seeker?

Author's name: Snowflower_14

Cover: 10/10

It's everything. I am in love with the cover, it has the badass vibe to it, like a criminal novel or mysterious-thriller type of thing. You really did a great job.

Title: 10/10

This title is interesting, probably because some stories have the title 'Hide and Seek?' but this one is different and I like it.

Blurb: 6/10

This story, looking at the cover and title, is going to be good with a better blurb. The use of 'gonna' and 'which is' ruins the whole thing. Here are some adjustments for you to consider:

'What will happen when the idea of catching the culprit turns into a different story?'

'Three strangers with different goals have one thing in common: catching the culprit. Will they be able to maintain the seeker role or is this story going to affect their personal lives more than anything?'

'Lia, an ordinary girl with a hefty past, goes for a job hunt that results in getting her into more trouble. Trying to help her, the two men come forward and their lives get tangled up in the case.'

This is a much more sophisticated blurb.

Creativity and Originality: 9/10

I like the idea of two men and a girl, rather than mafia gangs or an all girl scout, it's a solid and creative basis of how they are different yet have the same motive. Originality wise, it isn't that original for a girl that has a haunted past, since every story has a guy or a girl with a dark past (it's not a bad thing), but you added your own prints on it and it's good.

Plot Flow: 5/10

It's really mixed up, there is Lia's pov then 3rd person pov, then Y/o pov, it disrupts the whole flow and makes it harder to read what your idea is about. I suggest you edit more to polish it by rearranging the pov in separate chapters or putting two pov instead of three. That way it could be clear for the reader. It shows us that Lia is fired from her job, and the 3rd pov just shows that she is fired, so the plot flow is in slow motion. Then, it shows a chapter where it's 'you yelled' 'on your phone' – so, it's a roleplay? I don't understand why the whole chapter is about what I would do rather than Lia or the other characters.

Writing/Grammar: 3/10

I honestly can't score lower than a three. I can understand that maybe English isn't your first language and that's fine, but you can use Grammarly to correct the sentences. Readers will have a really hard time reading your story because of the dialogues sticking next to each other like: "I guessed it""so Lia as I told you" – they should be separated for the next line and names should be in capitals even in the dialogue.

There is also the word 'putted' which isn't a word, because it's supposed to be put. Grammarly can help you with editing because there are a lot of errors that hurt the eyes and can prevent the readers from enjoying your story.

Character Development: 5/10

I think the development pace is alright with how Lia gets worried after being fired and how Hyejin hires her, then her character developing stronger as she gets into the new job to how she thinks about Jimin and gets a phone call. Overall, it's okay for the characters, it's not too detailed nor too vague.

Genre Relevence: 7/10

The secretive phone call and the coincidences in the story makes it more of a thriller. The genre is relevant and you did a great job in interpreting it into the story.

Reader's Enjoyment: 5/10

I just feel like it's harder to read through it since I don't clearly understand some parts since you don't stick to a single pov or two povs. I expect to enjoy it, but I don't enjoy it from the errors and the wrong alignment of the story. Maybe if you edit it properly, I can give it another chance! you have the idea but you just need to execute it by words the right way.

Overall Score: 55/100