Twix

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When he comes back, the Twix is in his hand. He opens the package and breaks it in half, handing me one of the pieces.
"Thanks." I say taking it from his hand.
He takes a bite and chews thoughtfully.
I don't actually want mine, I just said that so he didn't pry.
He looks at me.
I inhale sharply.
"Espo are we going to find them?"
"Yeah we will. I know it."
He puts his arms around me and rests his chin on the top of my head.
"I love you." I whisper.
"I love you too chica."

Ryan's apartment smells wonderful after a day in the office. It smells clean but it smells like home. As soon as he opens the door, I walk to my room and change. I'm not hungry.
I hear a soft knock.
"Come in." Ryan opens the door.
"Hey. Are you hungry?"
I have to decide what I want to say.
"To be honest, no I'm not."
Ryan lets go of the door knob and walks towards me.
I expect him to yell at me for this, but instead he stops in front of me.
Slowly he wraps his arms around me and buries his face in my hair.
"Me neither."
He lets go and grabs my hand.
"Esposito put all of your stuff from the hospital in my car. You wanna go get it?"
"Yeah lets go."
We make several trips to his car and back, each time he takes the elevator and I take the stairs.
Afger his car is empty of my things, I walk to my bedroom to see it filled with stuffed animals, flowers, balloons, and lots of food.
I shake my head, staring at it all.
"Why did people get me all this?"
"Well you were on the news again. They found out about you and decided it would be nice to give you a get well soon present. The problem is, everyone thought that."
I laugh at him, but then become serious.
"I'm going to have a nightmare, I know it. Can you stay with me?"
"Of course."
We untuck the covers and lay down.
We are on opposite sides of the bed, and I face the wall.
As I close my eyes, flashes of pictures come floating back to me.
I go through all the bad moments I have experienced, from seeing death, to being tortured, to almost being blown to bits.
I am having trouble controlling my crying. I grip the pillow as the tears roll down my face.
My body is shaking the bed, and I know Ryan feels it. He slowly moves towards me, and wraps one arm around me, tucking me closer to him.
I turn to face him, and my face is met with his chest. I grip his shirt, as I cry into him.
"I wish I could take your pain away." Ryan whispers. I can hear the hurt in his voice.

And we fall asleep like this, as I cry, and I know even his presence won't keep the nightmares at bay.

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