Castle's partner

That Night

"Ryan there's blood on your sleeve. What happened?" Asks Castle.

He stares at his arm.

"I don't actually know. I'm not hurt. Samantha?"

They all look at me expectantly.

"I think it was my fingers. When I was untying the ropes."

"Oh. You good though?"

"Yep."

"Ok." Beckett nods. "I'll need to take your guys' statements but I'll give you a minute first."

The three of them head into the interrogation room.

I look at Ryan, and I can't read his face. It looks confused with a bit of relief and anger.

"What's wrong?"

He furrows his eyebrows and sets his jaw.

"How do you not hate me?"

I scoff. "Are you serious right now?"

He doesn't answer, and I feel my face soften.

"Why would I hate you?"

"It seems like all I do is put you in more pain."

"What are you talking about?"

"That night at the hangar. I keep thinking about it for some reason."

I think back to that night, and it brings painful memories.

I hear the shots being fired, and Beckett's muffled sobbing next to me as she is held down by Castle, and me by Ryan and Esposito.

Montgomery knew I would follow Beckett, so she sent them with Castle to get me out of there.

The thoughts subside, but it still hurts.

"I'd be dead Ryan. You and Espo saved me."

"Well what about yesterday? I didn't protect you. You could have died."

"So could you! It was my fault in the first place! I should be asking if you hate me."

I walk into his chest and he wraps me in his arms, resting his stubbly chin on my head.

"I love you. Thank you for saving my life. Again."

I smile against his shirt.

"Ryan?" I'm muffled by the cloth.

"Hmmm?"

"You need to shave."

He laughs, and I do too.

"Why? Does it hurt when I kiss you?"

He grabs me and kisses my cheek repeatedly.

I squeal and run away.

He chases me around all the desks. He trips the third time around, and I rush to his side.

My hands fly up to cover my mouth. "Are you ok?"

He groans. "Yeah. But I need first aid."

"What hurts?"

He grins. "My heart."

"Hey! I thought something actually happened! Not cool!"
I cross my arms.

"How about I give you one more and we call it fair?"

"Fine."

He leans in and kisses my nose.

"I love you. I hope you know that."

"I do. Let's go get this over with."

I go into the box with Ryan following right behind.

The other three are in there and I have to repeat what I told them already.

"Do you have any idea as to why he would do this?" Asks Espo.

I shrug. "He wants me to relive the pain I've...already...been through." I trail off. "What's today?"

"The fourteenth of July. Why?"

I fiddle my fingers.

"It's three years since my siblings were killed. That's why it's today. He wanted me to feel it again today."

"Samantha-" Beckett starts, but I cut her off.

"Are we done here?"

They look at each other, and she nods sadly.

I stand up.

"Samantha..."

I push the hair behind my ear.

"Um, I'm just gonna...go."

I walk out of the box and into the break room.

I sit on the couch and lean back.

I close my eyes, thinking about this day three years ago, and it hurts.

I realize how exhausted I am.

And hungry, for once.

I decide I need sleep more than I need food right now, so I lay down and I'm out like a light.