Nirvana (Liu Yuxin x reader)

-149-

Yuxin frowned when she realised that Y/N had seen a hate comment. She held Y/N close to her when she felt her grip loosen. She looked down and realised the poor girl was crying herself to sleep. She swiftly picked her up and carried her back to bed. After laying her down she moved up but felt a slight tug at her shirt and saw Y/N clutching it tightly. 'One second baby. I'll be right back.' She said slowing releasing her shirt and pecking her forehead. 

She pulled out a clean top and quickly changed. She noticed her phone light up and noticed some messages from her friends. She quickly replied that she was with Y/N and that they'd come down when Y/N was feeling a bit better. She put her phone on the bedside table before slipping under the covers and taking Y/N into her arms. Y/N cuddled against Yuxin making her smile. She wiped the tears away from Y/N's eyes and moved her hair so it was away from her face.

She could still see the troubled expression on her face and sighed. She had no idea that Y/N was feeling that insecure and wished she could've turned back time and helped her. But she knew that nothing could be done about the past so she decided that she was going to help Y/N become more confident and comfortable. She pulled herself closer to her and let the smell of her shampoo cloud her mind as she drifted off to sleep. 

Y/N woke up feeling very tired. She moved slightly but found Yuxin's arms around her. She looked at her peaceful face and sighed. There wasn't any signs of discomfort. She started to think that what the comment was saying wasn't true but was still to scared to completely admit it. She tried to get up but ended up waking Yuxin who looked at her with a slight worried expression. 'Is everything okay?' Y/N sighed and nodded. Y/N sat up and rubbed her eyes. Yuxin sat up next to her but kept one arm around her. 'How are you feeling?' She asked as Y/N closed her eyes. 'Tired.' 

'Do you want to sleep more?' Y/N shook her head. 'You want food?' Y/N shook her head again and hugged her knees. 'Can I ask you a question?' Y/N looked up and nodded. 'Am I being annoying?' Y/N smiled slightly and nodded. 'Okay I'll shut up.' Yuxin pouted. 'Keep talking.' Y/N whispered in a small voice. 'But I'm being annoying.' She tilted her head to the side while Y/N just watched. 'I don't mind.' Y/N responded. 'What should I talk about?' Y/N shrugged. 'Okay I'm gonna be really cringey and cheesey and list all the reasons why I love you.' Yuxin said while Y/N blushed and shook her head.

'You said you didn't mind me being annoying and you didn't suggest anything for me to talk about.' Y/N tried to hide behind her hair which made Yuxin laugh. She pulled Y/N up on to her lap and rested her head against her chest. 'Number one on the never ending list of why I love you is that I feel you're one of the only people I feel understands me. Even though I don't always tell you when I'm feeling down, I know you can make me feel better just by being there. I don't feel stressed or pressured when I'm with you. You give me strength and make me feel at ease. I feel comfortable around you.' Y/N bit her lip and looked down at Yuxin.

'Whatever that comment said, you haven't done anything wrong. You aren't selfish. You are enough. You are more than enough. I don't know what I did to deserve you. You are so selfless. You would still help the people who take advantage of you whether you know it or not. The person writing that comment doesn't know you like I know you. They don't know what goes on behind the scenes which means what they say could be and in this case is bullcrap.'

Y/N wanted to believe Yuxin but the insecurities wouldn't let her. 'Yuxin, I can't believe you. I want to but I can't. Her voice, what she said, it's still there. I can't get rid of it. She might not be around me but she won't stop in my head. I want it to stop. Yuxin I just want this pain to stop.' Y/N broke down again. Yuxin moved her around so she was comfortable and tried to help her calm down. 'Shh baby. It's going to be okay. I'm gonna make sure it's going to be okay.' Yuxin thought hard about how she could help Y/N when suddenly she had an idea. 'Baby, I think I know how I can help you.'

'Yuxin, you've already done enough. You've done more enough. I don't wanna be a bigger burden on you.' She said starting to feel more tired. 'You aren't a burden. You never will be. That woman kept on telling you the same things again and again until you started believing it. Maybe the same thing will happen if you're constantly reminded that you are enough. It'll take a while because what she has said has been permanently printed into your mind but we can try and counteract it.' Y/N listened and slowly calmed down. 'What if it doesn't work?' 

'It's worth a shot.' 

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