Nirvana (Liu Yuxin x reader)

-160-

After hearing the knocks on the door, Fan went to open the door, expecting to see Y/N but gasped when she saw Kun holding her. 'What happened?' She asked moving out of the way and pointing at the bed where Yuxin was seated. 'She fainted. My best guess is exhaustion. When did she eat and how much did she eat?' Yuxin jumped to her feet when she saw Kun but was pulled to the side by Keran so he could set her down on the bed. 'She ate earlier with us. She didn't want to eat a lot and we had to persuade her to eat more but she still didn't have loads.' Keran said, letting Yuxin go to see Y/N.

After quickly checking on her, Yuxin sighed before pulling out comfortable clothes for the sleeping girl and placing them on her desk. She locked herself in the bathroom and slid down the door so she was sitting on the floor. She let her tears fall but tried not to make any noise. She was worn out and frustrated. Why couldn't she have gone with Y/N to Kun's office? She would've been there to protect her but she wasn't. What kind of girlfriend was she? She couldn't help but let her insecurities cloud her mind and felt herself spiralling down into an endless abyss.

Meanwhile, Kun was explaining what had happened before Y/N passed out and the fake news about her and Seojoon. He noticed them start to look pissed off and felt a sense of relief that Y/N had friends that she could rely on. He felt at ease knowing that she had people that cared. Even though he hadn't experienced what she had, he was a very empathic person. He could relate to her and understand her pain. When Yuxin had finally came out of the bathroom Fan got up and walked over to her. She pulled the smaller girl in for a hug and held her closely. 

At first Yuxin was very tense but relaxed. She had never got a proper hug from Fan before and it felt nice. She rested her head on the younger girl's shoulder and let out a sigh. 'Don't worry, she's gonna be fine. No one's at fault here so don't blame yourself.' Yuxin was slightly surprised on how Fan knew. 'We've been living together for months now, I know how to read you.' She said, once again reading Yuxin's mind. 'I'll tell you more about my secret powers later.' She smiled causing one to also appear on her face. 

'Tell me all about it.' She said walking over to her bed. Kun was still sat on one of the chairs talking to Keran. He filled Yuxin in about the scandal and saw her tense up. 'We'll get this sorted as soon as possible though. Seojoon just doesn't want to put you two in danger. He doesn't mind throwing himself under the bus for you but Y/N's not having it. But don't worry, it will be sorted.' He reassured. Yuxin's confused expression made him speak up again. 'She would've told you sooner but she felt like she was letting you down somehow. Probably because it's a dating scandal but I can't say for sure.' She let out a sigh and held her head in her hands. 

She felt two pairs of hands pat her back and looked up to see her friends. 'I'm okay. Don't worry.' She said with a small smile. 'It's late so I'm gonna head back now. Get rest all of you. I'll swing by in the morning to see how Y/N is. See ya later girls.' Kun stood up and they exchanged nods before he let himself out. 'I'm gonna wash up. Be right back.' Keran said making the younger two nod. 

Fan yawned and leant on Yuxin's shoulder. 'You tired?' Yuxin asked ruffling Fan's fluffy hair with her other hand. 'A little bit but I wanna tell you about my spidey sense first.' Yuxin laughed quietly and nodded. 'Go on then.' Fan sat up and faced Yuxin. 'Well, I'm not exactly sure how to say it but I'm just very good at reading people and have a good idea of how they feel from the vibe they give off.' Yuxin listened to her explanation and by the end she understood what Fan was trying to say. 

'Like that one time last week. Before the eliminations, you were feeling down. I didn't say anything but I tried to help. When I offered to go with Y/N when she hurt herself, it was because I thought it would be extra hassle for you but you ended up going anyway.' Yuxin remembered the situation and looked over to Y/N. 'She didn't actually hurt herself. She did it as an excuse to get me out of there without people getting suspicious. She got it so the attention was on her and not me so no one would ask me questions. She knows I don't open up. I haven't told her much about myself when I feel like that though. But I trust her and because of that I can show her my vulnerable side. Now realising this though, I feel guilty. I feel like I should tell her more. I just don't wanna burden her. She's already got enough in her hair as it is.'

Yuxin sighed but Fan hugged her from the side. 'You won't burden her. Just how she doesn't burden you, you won't burden her.' Keran came out of the bathroom and Fan stood up to climb into her bed after giving Keran a hug. 'That was sudden.' She said putting her stuff away and climbing in after Fan. 'I just wanted a hug.' She pouted. Keran shook her head and pulled her close, so she could snuggle up. They soon fell asleep, leaving Yuxin sitting up in bed next to Y/N. She ran her fingers through the sleeping girl's silky strands of hair and rested her head back, thinking over what Fan had said.

_________________________________________

Heyy,

How is everyone??

I hope everyone had a lovely Christmas and a Happy new yearrr <3

I'm trying to write more and I'm gonna try and finish this quickly because I have a feeling that I'm making it too long and just boring people with it 😂

~UM 🖤