REQUESTS CLOSED Formula 1 One Shots III

Cognizance - [Charles Leclerc]

A/N: for godblesstheoceanel

TAGLIST: Garrixer_06 landon0rris jxan_F1 MariPecs10 Chami2207 marxssel McLaren_04 cuteleklerk ferraritastic black_ma23 sxrryforthebadword Judy_Taurus wanderlust_gemini smilethankstothem rosaa- CassieRochester

WORDCOUNT: 1344

SYNOPSIS: Your relationship with Charles isn't what it was, and when you leave him early in the morning without waking him up, you realize you're still each other's one and only.

It was a little past five in the morning, and you weren't able to continue your slumber. You were awake for a couple of minutes already, rolled onto your side and staring at the man next to you in bed. You looked at Charles' handsome features, his long lashes that nearly touched his cheeks while his eyes were closed. His face peaceful as he slept, eyebrows relaxed, his arm under his pillow while he laid on his stomach, the sheets resting just below his shoulders. Charles had returned from his race weekend in Budapest last night, and after watching his race ending in the first lap, you didn't want to confront his disappointed self. You felt awful for pretending you were asleep when he was quiet while coming into the house, your heart had clenched together when he had softly called out your name to see if you were awake. Your eyes had been watery when he laid down next to you with a sigh.

You and Charles were high school sweethearts. You had been with him before the height of his career arrived, before Ferrari was interested in him, before his father and the most important people in his life passed away. Before it became tough to be in a relationship with an F1 driver, you were already together. It was really this season that was tough for the both of you. More attention and pressure than ever was put on Charles' shoulders. Starting the season with a new, talented teammate, he was expected to be the more experienced Ferrari driver. In his eyes, his results had been disappointing, and his mood worked through the bone of your relationship. A couple of weeks ago, you two had an argument, because he felt like you weren't joining him at enough race weekends, while Carlos' girlfriend came by so many times, and so were the girlfriends of the William's drivers. The height of your heated conversation caused you to exclaim that you weren't the kind of woman to give up her life for her racing boyfriend, he had remained quiet, and the conversation was over.

Even though there had been space and time between the last couple races, you felt like you hadn't seen Charles a lot at all. He had been in Maranello a lot, or went karting with his friends and his brother. Your early morning thoughts made you sit up in bed, nearly feeling nauseous, and you swung your legs over the edge of the bed. Without waking him up, you made your way downstairs. You needed fresh air, you needed to get out of here for a while. Slipping your feet into some sneakers you left at the door, you took a sweater and made your way outside. You took the elevator downstairs to get out of the apartment building. The sun just rose above the horizon, the new day in Monte Carlo just started. It was quiet out, apart from some party animals who just hauled taxi's, or drunkenly walked back to their hotels or homes. You walked along the pavement, burying your hands in the pockets of the hoodie. It was Charles', his scent lingering in the collar. What was your deal actually? What was the reason that caused your relationship to be like this?

You weren't like one of the girlfriends of other drivers. You were still studying, dedicated to it, and you weren't up to leave for a weekend, while important essays and exams were coming up. Maybe you were holding on to it too tightly. You could surely miss one weekend, and it's not like that one weekend was vital for the rest of your study. And the summer break had arrived nevertheless. Your heart froze in your chest at the thought that you wouldn't be able to spend the summer break with Charles, because of the icy atmosphere that was between you. The more you thought about it, the crazier you considered yourself. Charles could have easily left you if he didn't think that your support, love, or anything else wasn't enough. Charles had never complained before that you were too busy with your study. You were putting the pressure of your life on the both of you, and it wasn't fair. The fresh air outside nevertheless caused your mind to be cleared, and about an hour later, you walked back to the apartment building.

It was a little after six when you came back, quietly in the hallway, as barely any of the neighbors were awake at this time. You unlocked the door and came inside, met with Charles in the doorway as he was about to swing his jacket over his arms. "I called you ten times!" he exclaimed, immediately shooting it at you. He stepped forward and into the small light that hung on the wall. His eyes were bloodshot and watery. "Charles..." you started, feeling incredibly guilty. "I thought you left me," Charles said, his voice breaking slightly. "I was about to go out and look for you, you weren't there when I woke up," he continued, causing you to shrink in front of him with each word he said. "I-I'm sorry, I just needed to clear my head, I-," you stammered. "Do you still love me?" he asked, and the fact that he found the need to ask you that, broke your heart, and caused your eyes to prickle with tears. "Of course I do," you said, reaching for his face.

"Please, believe when I say that I love you," you added, your thumbs moving over his cheeks, and his hands curled around your waist to pull you close. "I love you so much," you cried softly. "I'm sorry for leaving this morning, I just needed to think," you explained. "About what?" Charles asked, the concern and worry written over his face, fear rising in his heartbeat. "It doesn't matter, it only made me realize that we have to give and take in our relationship, and I haven't been adding to that balance at all. And I'm so sorry for that," you told him. "I want you to be there when I race my heart out. You know how much Ferrari means to me," Charles said, and now it was his turn to wipe your cheeks. "And of course I don't expect you to give up your life for my career," he continued, causing you to let out a soft laugh, as you now heard how dramatic it sounded. "We have to get back to us, just us," Charles continued. "Let's have a break together, figure things out together." You nodded in agreement.

"I love you," he said, making your lips curl upwards when you looked into his crystal eyes. "And don't leave me again without waking me," Charles told you, making you nod again. "I promise," you softly said. He lifted your chin, leaving a sweet kiss on your lips. Your fingers curled into his shirt, pulling him down to kiss him again, and again. "It's so early," Charles said as he parted from you with a yawn. "We should go back to bed," he hummed, to which you agreed. You both went back to the bedroom, and you slipped out of your leggings to get under the sheets with him. You regretted going out without notifying him, however you were relieved that you had this conversation with him, even at an ungodly hour in the morning. Charles pulled you close, and you rested your head on his chest, cuddling like you hadn't done in a while. He sighed, finally feeling relaxed. And you were glad that this morning brought the cognizance to the both of you, that you were meant to remain together.