LMPYITP: The Random Passages

I Said, "Stand Up! Don't Sit Back Down!"

            "What yer doin'?" Liam asked watching me curiously.

"Packin'." I replied as I stuffed more clothes into my suitcase.

"For what?"

"To go to the ARIA Awards. Jet's gettin' inducted into 'em-"

"Sound." He nodded. "When d'we leave?"

I sighed knowing that moment was bound to come at some point. "We are not goin' nowhere." I pointed from myself to him. "Matt and I got invited to be-"

"You fuckin' what?!" Noel shouted barging into the bedroom. Clearly, he'd been stood outside the bedroom dropping eaves...not that I expected anything less.

"We got invited to be seat fillers." I informed him and Liam. "Not to mention The NME wants me to write an article about it. Twenty years of Get Born, plus Jet's gettin' inducted before Powderfinger, You Am I, and so many others should be."

"Why can't yer take Our Kid with yer?" Noel questioned me nodding over at Liam. "If it's one thing he knows how to do it's sit his arse down and fill somebody's fuckin' seat!"

"He weren't invited." I replied. "The invite said-"

"That's bollocks and we all fuckin' know it! Don't fuckin' lie to us, Jules!"

"I ain't lyin'!" I shook my head. "Why would either one of yins even wanna go when-"

"I don't wanna fuckin' go!" Noel pointed at himself. "But he deffo wants to fuckin' g-"

"He's not! Invited!" I screamed. I winced when I noticed the pain in Liam's eyes. "You people go plenty of places without me-"

"Only 'cuz yer refuse to fuckin' go with us!" Liam quipped. "Knebworth and that. Even fuckin' Australia-"

"This'd be borin' for you 'cuz we'd be doin' all sorts of stuff you don't like with people you don't like-"

"Like who? I like Jet. It's Our Kid who don't!" He nodded at Noel.

"Who the fuck said I didn't fuckin' like Jet?" Noel inquired. "'Cuz last time I checked I-"

"Who the fuck 'ad fuckin' Nic Chester on their fuckin' t-"

"It's Nic Cest-er!" I corrected him covering my face in exhaustion. "And it don't even fuckin' matter 'cuz-"

"Yes, it fuckin' does!" They exclaimed in unison.

            "You're not fuckin' goin'!" Liam shouted.

"Excuse you?" I shot back.

"No fuckin' excuses! Not unless I fuckin' go with yer 'cuz you'll not be goin' with-"

"'Cuz you're worried I'll fuck him?" I raised my eyebrows suggestively. "Just like I'm sure Nicole worried you fucked-"

"Stop it, Jules!" Noel cut me off.

"Absolutely not!" I shook my head. "'Cuz I ain't gonna bow down to all this bullshit double standard of you two havin' all them women 'lookin' after ya' whilst you're on tour!"

"I don't fuck any of the birds from my management firm!" He defended.

"Sure ya don't! Just like your ex-wife don't fill her face with plastic or frequent all them BDSM clubs! Two divorces each." I looked from him to Liam. "Kids ya want acknowledge unless it's socially beneficial...for you more so than them...shall I keep goin' or should I continue keepin' it all to myself?"