LMPYITP: The Random Passages

Shop 'Til Yer Drop

They were set up in the living room looking as professional as they could be, the whole lot of them. There was tea on the coffee table and everyone in their seats around it.

            "This bitch!" I muttered rolling my eyes as soon as I noticed her sat there.

            Why we had to go out of our way pretending to be something we weren't just for her, I never understood it. It's not like she gave a shit either way.

            "Sorry, I'm late." I grinned in sarcasm as I entered the room. "I didn't want to come."

            The Wombats had just released a new song recently and boy, was it a banger.

            "Oh, that's alright, Jules." Fiona smiled back at me in just as much sarcasm. "We all knew you couldn't bear to miss it."

            "So, what's so pressin' this couldn't be an email? 'Cuz we all know a meeting without food c-"

            "Just sit the fuck down, Jules!" Noel ordered pointing at the empty space on the couch.

            I flattened my lips as I sat my ass right down. "Y'know, after years of Britain not havin' Mexican food, now they do." I informed everyone. "There's a Taco Bell right here in London and a Mexican place in Birmingham. I think they do food from different South American countries."

            "Right." Fiona nodded. "Well, perhaps you can stop there on your way to...as we all know, the Pretty Green Shop in Manchester's last day of operation is tomorrow-"

            "Damn Amazon!" I quipped. "Although I don't think you can actually buy Pretty Green from there other than some chintzy knockoffs. Them Etsy dropshippers-"

            "Shut the fuck up, Jules!" Noel scolded me.

            I rolled my eyes as Fiona took a deep breath.

            "They've asked that you and Gene come and help them out." She revealed.

            "Why?" I inquired. "We ain't got no ties to that place. Plus, Liam sold out in 2019." I pointed at him. "He's still the face though technically, and what keeps that place relevant."

            "Exactly." Fiona agreed. "But can you honestly see our Liam being anything more than a pretty face? I don't think running the cash desk would be something-"

            "Oi!" Noel shrieked.

            Fiona nodded slightly then turned back to me. "You'll go to Manchester and assist with the shop. You don't have a choice!"

            "Yes, I do!" I countered. "That woman they've got a statue of stood on a chair worked dead hard so women like me can have a choice!"

            Regardless, I chose to do as I was told.

            "I could go with yous if yer wanted." Liam offered as he watched me pack my suitcase.

            "No, you couldn't." I replied shaking my head. "Ya ain't got no experience workin' in retail plus the place'll go nuts even more so than it already will with you there."

            "No worse than when I've visited at Christmas."

            I frowned as I looked up at him. "So, what would you do whilst you're there then? If you come with us?"

            He shrugged. "Whatever anyone wants me to do."

            "Which you'd expect to be standin' around lookin' pretty!"