LMPYITP: The Random Passages

"C u sn.x"

Author's Note:

            I should probably preface this by saying the idea for this story came long before THE BIG ANNOUNCEMENT! There's another story hopefully on the way. It was meant to come before this one and I hoped to write and post them together but unfortunately that's not going to happen. There's some subtle foreshadowing or aftershadowing in each of them that may or may not be super important but still needs to be included.

            I hope you enjoy this story!

            Thanks again for reading!

            I gazed at myself in the mirror making sure all my hair was tucked up inside my flat cap. I had blow dried and straightened it to make it easier to stuff inside my hat. I had to wear the hat. It wasn't optional.

            When I was finished, I went to exit the bathroom but jumped with a gasp at the sight of Gene stood in front of the door.

            "What's the matter?" I asked him.

            He rolled his eyes as he stepped down the hall cueing me to follow him.

            We stopped in the living room and gazed at the sight.

            "He's gonna make us miss our fuckin' train!" Gene whined.

            "No, he won't!" I declared marching towards the dude in the armchair.

            I cleared my throat then bent down with my mouth right beside his ear. "She's stealin' your pension!" I screamed right into it.

            "Jesus!" He exclaimed jumping in his seat. "What the f-"

            "Get your ass up! Let's go!" I ordered pointing at the door.

            We got the train to Scotland which included seats with a table in between them. Me and Gene on one side, Noel on the other.

            "What's with the hats?" Noel questioned us.

            "Our Gerald told us to wear 'em." I revealed.

            "Right. And if he told yous to jump off a fuckin' bridge would yer do that anall?"

            I rolled my eyes. "You're just jealous 'cuz Liam got him first. It's like takin' the oil riggers up on their first offer when ya shoulda held out and waited for a better one."

            "I have done, haven't I?" He shrugged his eyebrows at me.

            "The fuck's he on about?" Gene looked at me. "Jules?"

            "He ain't on about nothin'!" I snapped glaring at Noel.

            "He don't wear hats does he, Jules?" Noel raised his eyebrows again.

            "He did at one point and met Daniel O'Donnell in the process." I informed him. "So, if that ain't a flex, I don't know what is!"

            Just then, all our phones chimed in the receiving of a text.

            "It's Fiona." Noel announced as if we didn't already know. "She's WhatsApped us. 'Did yous get on alright?'."

            "That's all she ever asks!" I quipped. "Somebody else tex her back 'cuz I ain't talkin' to her!" I waved my hands up dismissively.

            "Well, I don't see why I should have to fuckin' do it!" Noel reasoned. "I'm not the one who fuckin' glassed someone at fuckin' Tesco!"