Johnlock One-shots

301.Smut

HAHA JK YOU THOUGHT I'D WRITE SMUT NO APRIL FOOLS

okay I'm sorry don't hate me
I love you, nooo don't gooooo

Baby come backkkk
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Prank War

“Rosamund Mary Watson!” John yelled, opening his young daughter's room. “What the hell is this?” He pointed to his husband, who had a face full of flour, the powdery white substance was all over him, sticking to his wet hair and falling off his clothes.

Flour in the hair dryer. Classic.

The six year old laughed, “Oh my gosh! Look at him!” She clapped. “Yes, take a picture! Haha!”

“No, Rosie. That's bad! Sherlock has to work today.”

Rosie couldn't stop smiling. “But it's April Fool's!” She laughed more.

“Fine, then. If you want to play it this way, we can.” John crossed his arms.

“Alright. Let's go!” Rosie stood up from where she was sitting. Sherlock walked up to her and set his hands on her shoulders. She looked up at his face. “Hi, Daddy. I like how you did your makeup.” She giggled. Sherlock smiled and kissed her, getting flour over where he kissed.

“Really? Why, thank you.” He stood and picked Rosie up, kissing her again. The flour was falling onto her. She giggled, wiggling around.

“Noo! Daddy! You're going to get it all over me.” She pouted and reached to John, who came over and kissed her forehead, then walked away.

“You know he's gonna get chu,” Sherlock whispered playfully, booping her nose.

“I know,” She whispered back, hugging Sherlock's shoulders. He set her on the ground, and she walked to her closet, going inside to do something.

Sherlock walked downstairs and found John in the kitchen, trying to reach a cabinet that was too high for him. “Hey, Sexy. Whatcha doin’?” Sherlock asked, walking up to his husband and kissing his cheek. John rubbed off the flour that transferred to his cheek and chuckled softly.

“Can you get me those doughnuts, please?” He asked, wrapping his arms around Sherlock and making puppy eyes. Sherlock smiled and kissed his forehead, getting the doughnuts and setting them on the table.

“There you go.”

“Thank you. Now go take another shower, and wash that flour off.” John smiled at his lover, who looked very adorable.

“Yes, captain.” Sherlock ruffled John's hair as he walked off, with his usual grace that almost made John melt all over him, and went to the bathroom to take another shower.

John smiled a little and turned around to the fridge to get something else.

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“Rosamund!” Sherlock called, looking at the stairway to her room. “Dinner time!”

“Coming!” Their little girl came running down the stairs, pillows duct taped to her stomach and back, her bicycle helmet strapped around her face, and rain boots that went to her knees. It also looked like she had gotten into the paint, since there were red lines on her cheeks, and red on her fingers. Sherlock laughed, thinking she was adorable.

She couldn't get up to her seat in that outfit, so John helped her

They started eating. Shrimp chowder, ham, mashed potatoes..

And for dessert, doughnuts. Because Rosamund loved doughnuts.

Rosie finished her dinner quickly, then asked Sherlock to help her reach the doughnuts. He picked her up and held her, she got the box, and he set her back at her seat. She picked a chocolate frosted one with cream inside.

John watched her, and she took a bite. Then she spat it out, “EW!! OH MY GOD!! SHERDADDY, what did Dad do?!!” She threw the doughnut at John's face. He laughed and threw it in the trash, cleaning his face with a napkin.

“He filled it with mayonnaise, Sweetheart.” Sherlock said, just there to observe their war.

“Bad dad!” Rosie hopped out of her seat and went to John, hitting his legs powerlessly. She was just six years old, it didn't hurt.

John picked her up, “It's okay, you can have another doughnut. One that I didn't put mayonnaise in.”

He kissed her cheek and gave her another one, but they were all filled with doughnuts, so she spat it back out and threw it on the floor. “EWW! Dad! Ewww!” She wiggled out of his hands and got her cup of water, chugging it. Then, she grabbed her cup, and ran upstairs, screaming nonsense.

“She's not going to let you out of this war,” Sherlock said, amused.

“Not the first war I've been in.” John smirked and looked at Sherlock, who had a silly smile.

“Go get her.” Sherlock said, chuckling. John kissed him quickly and went upstairs to mess with their daughter more.