Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man In A Zombie Apocalypse. Entries 757 to 956

Entry 798: Monday 3rd December 2018

Entry 798
Monday 3rd December 2018

Oh my God! Things just keep getting worse.

Blade came around today and he said something that I absolutely didn't expect to hear, and right now I have no idea what's going to happen to me...

Ash and I were in the kitchen having a cup of tea when there was a knock at the door. My heart sank and I looked up with dread on my face. I just knew it would be Blade. I recognised his authoritative knock. A few seconds later Mia came into the kitchen and told me that Blade was here to see me. I took a final swig of my tea, gave a deep sigh and walked into the living room followed by Mia and Ash.

As I entered the living room, I immediately noticed the serious look on Blade's face. He looked angry and tired. I knew I was in for a b*llocking. "Hello Luke," Blade, firmly said, "I think you know why I'm here." Without any thought I just blurted something out. "I didn't kill Katie!" I loudly said. Blade looked confused and then noticed that Mia and Ash were in the doorway. "Luke, maybe we should have this conversation in private?" said Blade. "No, I want witnesses," I firmly said, "I'm not going to be accused of something I haven't done without witnesses." "Luke, are you really sure that you want Ash and Mia to stay?" Blade asked in a serious tone. "I do," I firmly said, "I know you've come to accuse me of Katie's murder. Well I didn't do it. I mean, I know it looks bad what with everything that went on between us but I didn't kill her. You'd better not think of pinning this on me." Luke..." said Blade. "No," I firmly said, interrupting Blade, "I haven't done anything wrong. I reckon you're the one who's got something to hide." "I beg your pardon?" Blade said with an increased seriousness in his tone, "Perhaps you'd like to explain what you mean?" I felt intimidated by Blade's assertive tone but I'd started now, so I had to continue. "He thinks you're involved in all these people going missing," said Mia. "And I think he thinks you killed Katie," said Ash. "Will you two f*cking shut up!?" I snapped, "I can do this on my own." "You think I'm involved with your Mother and the others going missing?" asked a calm yet intimidating sounding Blade, "And you think I killed Katie. Is that what you think?" Blade locked maintained direct eye contact with me and he sustained his intimidating demeanour. I felt scared. "Well," I said, as my voice started to tremble, "You don't seem to have taken all these people disappearing seriously, and I think you turning up at Katie's like you did looks a bit suspicious." Blade didn't move. His inaction and tense stare were really freaking me out. "Luke," he firmly said, as he rolled his eyes, "We discussed this the other day. I don't know how many times I need to keep repeating myself. I am worried about people disappearing and I am taking it seriously. I told you why I was at Katie's and as for me killing her, that's ridiculous. In fact, it's quite embarrassing. Katie was the only journalist we had on the Island and I wanted her help to find the missing people. Apart from her death being a tragedy, it has made my job harder, and as for you being suspicious of me showing up at Katies, I could equally say that I was suspicious seeing you show up at Katie's after all the misunderstandings that have occurred between you." "Yeah but I told you why I was there," I said. "Yes," said Blade, "And I told you why I was there. Luke, I don't think you murdered Katie. I'm not even here right now to talk to you about Katie's murder – although I will need to talk to you about it at some point; I'm here to talk to you about what happened at the primary school the day before yesterday." I turned around to Mia and Ash who looked very intrigued and told them that I wanted them to leave. "We're not going anywhere." Ash firmly said, "I want to know what you've been up to now." "Luke," said Blade, "What happened at the school was very serious and I..." "Yes, OK!" I loudly said, "Fine! Yes, I was naked on all fours on a stage in front of a load of primary school kids! Yes, I was gagged with a cucumber sticking out of my arse! Yes, I sh*t all over the primary school kids when Mike pulled the cucumber out of my arse! Yes, Mike handed the sh*tty end of the cucumber to the traumatised vicar! Yes, the teacher passed out with fright! And yes, I am utterly mortified and completely embarrassed, but it was all one big misunderstanding." Silence lingered. Blade stared at me with a rather confused look on his face as I turned and noticed Mia and Ash frozen to the spot with their faces covered in sheer horror. "Well..." I tentatively said to Blade, "You knew all that anyway, didn't you?" "No..." Blade bluntly said, "Well, I certainly knew about you being naked, but I had no idea you defecated on the pupils of the primary school. I haven't had a chance to see Miss Briggs yet..." "Oh..." I said. I'd just made myself look like a right pr*ck but there was no point in hiding it. Miss Briggs and the moody vicar were bound to tell Blade eventually and everyone was going to find out at some point. A rather awkward silence lingered for a few moments. "You sh*t all over some primary school kids when Mike pulled a cucumber out of your arse?" Ash slowly said in disbelief. "Shut up," I snapped, "You're making it sound weird." "It is f*cking weird!" Ash loudly exclaimed, "For God's sake, what's wrong with you!? How does someone go from getting ready to deliver a presentation to a group of primary school children, to being naked on all fours? And how the HELL do you end up sh*tting all over everyone." "That was Mike's fault," I exclaimed, "He was trying to get the cucumber out of my arse and he yanked it too hard." "Luke, how did you end up with a cucumber up your bum?" asked Mia. "It was bl**dy Catherine," I snapped, "She's the one to blame for all this." "Catherine?" said Ash, "Your boss? The manager of Sainsbury's? What's she got to do with all this?" "We've been shagging each other." I said, rolling my eyes. "What!?" Mia and Ash simultaneously said together with an equal amount of shock. "She was at the school getting all horny and she grabbed me when I was behind the stage and said she wanted some fun," I said, "I didn't think the b*tch would just leave me there." "Luke, that's why I'm here," said Blade. "What do you mean?" I asked. "Actually," Ash said to Blade, "Why are you hear? You don't want to talk to him about Katie's murder and you didn't know about all the sh*t associated drama that went on at the school, so what's going on?" "Yeah," I said, frowning with confusion, "Why are you here?" "Luke, Catherine has accused you of rape." Blade said. At that point I felt like my world had ended. I froze with shock as my entire body was consumed with goose bumps. Silence followed. "Luke," said Blade, "Did you hear me?" "Sorry," I said, taking in the horrific news, "Did you say rape?" "Yes," said Blade, "Catherine said that she came behind the stage curtain and that you forced yourself on her." "She's lying!" Mia screamed, "Luke wouldn't do that." "That's not what happened?" I calmly said, "Why is she saying this? Why is she making these things up?" "Luke, we have to investigate," said Blade. "There's nothing to investigate," snapped Mia, "It's all lies." "Mia, people don't lie about being raped," said Blade. "You mean you believe her?" I said to Blade. "No, I'm not saying that," said Blade. "Well that's what it sounds like," snapped Mia, "Luke is NOT a rapist. I was raped by a bloke called Hillary. It was awful. Luke's not capable of that sort of thing." "Mia, please," said Blade, "I have to look into this." "It sounds like you've already found him guilt!" snapped Mia. "Jon, I haven't done anything," I said. "Tell me in your own words what happened," said Blade. "Well me and Catherine have been having sex for a while now," I said, "And when I saw her at the school she came and found me when I was behind the stage curtain. She said we had time to have a bit of fun and then she made me strip naked. She's a bit of a Dominatrix. I got naked behind the curtain and then she pulled out a bondage gag thing and made me wear it. She blind folded me and put some earplugs in my ears and then started to stick a very big cucumber up my arse. She's into that. The next thing I knew Catherine had gone, the curtain opened and I was left on stage completely humiliated." "I see," said Blade. "What does that mean – I see?" I asked "What do you see?" "Luke, why didn't you tell Catherine that you didn't want to have sex with her?" asked Blade. "Have you met her?" I exclaimed, "She's sh*t scary. She stuck bull dog clips on my nipples and slapped me across the face. Anyway, to be honest, she got me all turned so I thought a quick bit of sex behind the curtains whilst no one was looking would be OK. I didn't think she'd gag me, stick a cucumber up my arse and leg it. I mean come on. You don't really think I raped her, do you?" "Luke, what I think doesn't matter," said Blade. "It does if you're investigating," said Mia. "Luke, Catherine alleges that you've been harassing her ever since you started working at Sainsbury's. She says you've raped her in the office on more than one occasion." "She's f*cking lying" I angrily yelled, "God I knew she was sadistic but I didn't think she was this bad. I have done nothing wrong. I mean come on. Do you think I stripped off, got naked behind the stage curtain, blindfolded myself, gagged myself and stuck a cucumber up my arse all on my own?" "Catherine says that you threatened to rape her if she didn't stick the cucumber up your bum," said Blade, "She's saying that you're the Dominant one and that sticking cucumbers up arses is your thing, not hers." "This is bullsh*t!" I loudly snapped, "Absolute bullsh*t. Mike! Ask Mike! He was there in reception when he figured out me and Catherine were shagging each other." "I've spoken to Mike and I've spoken to Catherine," said Blade, "Their stories match up but Catherine said she walked away because she felt uncomfortable. She said you were trying to disguise rape as friends with benefits." "I don't believe this is happening," I said. "Jon, surely you can't just take someone's word for it," said Ash, "There has to be an investigation." "Yes," said Blade, "And I'm going to investigate. To be honest I could do without all this. What with Katie being murdered." "Well tell that to Catherine not me!" I loudly snapped, "Jesus, this is insane." "Well for now you need to stay away from Catherine," said Blade, "And that includes not going into work until this matter's cleared up." "Well how is this investigation going to work, exactly?" asked Ash, "We don't have a police force, there's no legal system that involves a judge or anything, and you and your men are hardly trained to deal with matters like this." "We're going to do the best we can," said Blade, giving Ash form look, "We may not be experts in matters like this, but I'm pretty sure GRID personnel won't f*ck things up like you ACROBAT lot would have done." "Jon, you can't just believe someone," I said, "I'm not a rapist! If anything, she raped me!" "Women can't legally commit rape, Luke," said Blade, "UK law says rape is committed by a penis." "Really?" said Ash, "I didn't know that." "Look, what needs to happen to make all this go away?" I asked. "It's not going to go away, Like," said Blade, "There's going to be an investigation. You need to cooperate and, in the meantime, stay away from Catherine." "It's OK, Luke," said Mia, "Everyone knows you're not a rapist. It's not like you've gone for this sort of thing before." "Well technically speaking that's not true," said Blade. "What do you mean?" I asked. "Tania has given me a statement that says she saw you molesting Aliyx when you worked at the farm." "I didn't molest anyone!" I yelled, "Aliyx was the one that was molesting and sexually harassing me!" "It also doesn't look good that you exposed yourself in front of a hall full assembly hall filled with ten-year-olds," said Blade. "Oh my God," I said, as I started to get overwhelmed, "I can't believe this is happening." "Look, I've got a lot to do," said Blade, "I'll continue with my investigation and get back to you. Remember, stay out of the way of Catherine. I haven't forgotten about your Mum either." "B*llocks to her," I snapped, "I'm more bothered about being falsely labelled a rapist!" "Luke," said Blade, "I'm looking into the disappearances, I'm looking into Katie's murder and I'm looking into Catherine's allegation. I've got a lot on, so bear with me and I'll get back to you." Blade got up and made his way to the front door. "Wait a minute," I said, "If you think I did rape Catherine what happens then?" "Well, let's just wait and see what happens," said Blade. "No!" I snapped, "I want you to tell me right now. What will happen to me?" "You'll end up in the Isle of Wight Prison," said Blade, "I'm sorry." Blade left and I burst into tears. Mia and Ash tried to calm me and provide me with reassurance but I was in a right state. Tears were streaming down my face; I was pacing up and down the living room and my heart was beating so fast I ended up having a panic attack. Thankfully Ash knew how to deal with me and after a few deep breaths I felt slightly calmer.

I spent the rest of the day in my room with Leo. I just wanted to be on my own. Mia's determined to prove that I've done nothing wrong, but from the look on Ash's face, he thinks I might be guilty. He had the same look on his face that Blade had on his. It's like I'm guilty until proven innocent rather than innocent unproven guilty. What the hell am I going to do if I end up in prison!? I'll be a few doors down from Harold! I won't see Leo or Auntie Meryl and my life will effectively be over. God! When the outbreak happened, I thought it was the worst thing that could possibly happen but this is worse! Everyone's going to think I'm a rapist! Word will get out and all of my friends will stop talking to me. I'm so panicky and anxious but I'm also REALLY angry. If we were on the mainland living in the apocalypse amongst all the infected, I think I'd throw Catherine to a pack of the horrid flesh eaters. How can she lie like this and why would she do it? I'm so angry and to make things worse I can't see her to try and sort this out.

I have no idea what I'm going to do...