Irondad & spiderson One shots {open}

Wanda no!

Omg I've laughing at this for way too long

Requested by: FoxFoxGoose

*PETER'S POV*

Crapcrapcrapcrapcrap!
They're onto me. Tony and the other Avengers are suspicious! They saw me come home with a black eye! They're gonna interrogate me and then literally kill Flash! I can't live with that on my continence!

*FLASHBACK*

It was a pretty normal day. Surprising. I hadn't seen Flash yet. It was good luck. I've learned to know that good luck doesn't last. In this case, it ran out at lunch.

"Hey Penis!" I sighed.

'So much for a good day.'  
I turned around on my seat and looked at the bully, genuinely bored. "What?"  "Don't talk to me like that Parker. Unless you want to be knocked out." He tried intimidating me by putting his hand in a fist.
'I highly doubt he could knock me out.' I thought.

I rolled my eyes and turned back around so I could eat my PB and J. Obviously, he wouldn't allow that. He turned me back around. "What. Do. You. Want. Flash?" I don't think he even knew what he wanted. MJ and Ned looked kind of surprised at my standing up for myself.

"I-Just to tell you how pathetic you are." "I think I would know that considering you told me that yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that- must I go on?" He stood there for a moment, in shock.

I raised an eyebrow. 'Jesus Christ... Tony's really rubbing off on me.'

Flash was obviously pissed. "You're gonna regret that penis." He growled as he stalked away. "Way to go man." "Yeah loser. I didn't have to slap him this time -And to top it off, I've now got a new people in crisis sketch to do." She said with a smirk. I chuckled fondly.

The day went on just as it'd started. Normal. Again, this stops. Of course, it was Flash again. Of fricking course.

"Penis." He spat. "You made me look like an idiot!" He yelled, throwing me onto the locker. "I didn't make you look an idiot. You already were one-!" A punch was thrown. "Since when do you talk back! Your friend Tony Stark teach you?!" He sneered.

'Well...he was half right.'

So yeah. That's how I got beat up. Going home was the problem though.

~~~FLASHBACK OVER :D~~~

When I peeked my head through the entrance, I could see that I wouldn't be very lucky today. All the Avengers were in the living room.

Clint and Sam were playing Mario cart and shouting at each other, trying to get one another out of their concentration. Wanda and Vision were huddled in the corner of the couch, watching amusingly. 

Thor and Loki were fighting near the kitchen. Loki had just turned into a snake for the 3rd time this week and it was also the 3rd time Thor fell for it, thus getting stabbed.

Tony and Bruce were trying to explain an experiment they'd been working on to Rhodey, Steve, and Bucky. It was chaotic as usual but I wouldn't have it any other way.