Confetti it's a Parade Book 2

Forgotten

Dean Winchester x Reader

Synopsis: Just feeling down and forgotten, you come to find out you aren't as invisible as you think.

It was amazing how fast it could happen. One minute you could feel as if you've had a good day, then your mood would slowly start to fade away, leaving you aching and wanting more. It wasn't easy to describe what that more was, but you felt empty and out of sorts. It seemed to be hitting more and more, but so far you had done a good job of hiding it. 

This time you could feel the warning signs, just as a hunt had ended successfully. A kitsune that the three of you had taken out should have left you feeling happy, celebrating with your boyfriend Dean. But instead, you watched as the two brothers went about the motel room, getting ready for a night on the bar. Sitting on the bed, silently observing, like you did more and more often these days. Your talkative days had turned into silent ones, but no one had seemed to notice, or care. 

"Y/N, you're coming with us, right?" Dean asked you, standing there looking as handsome as ever in his green and gray flannel and slim jeans. His arms were out at his sides, a cocky smile on his face.

"No, I think I'll stay back." You answered quietly, waiting for his reaction. Hoping, in a small way, that he would ask you again, or even beg you a little bit. Anything to let you know that you were wanted. 

"Alright. Want us to bring you back food?" Was all he said, dashing your hopes without even knowing it.

"Sure." Was all you said, as he turned to leave the room, Sam following behind. Giving you a glance, he walked out the door, and soon you were alone in the room. But it was more than that. You even felt alone when they were with you. Like you were just an extra, just there when needed.

Rolling over to your side on the bed, you stared at the wall, feeling tears swell up. It was stupid, you knew it was, but you couldn't help the feelings of being alone, completely alone in this hurtful world. Yeah, you had Dean, who you loved more than everything. But, he was rough around the edges, and didn't realize that sometimes you needed more than the simple pat on the back, or lovemaking in the dark. It would be nice to have someone notice when you weren't exactly you, to know when you were feeling like the whole world was forgetting you. 

Dean's P.O.V.

Sitting down at the booth in the bar, I quickly ordered a beer and a burger as Sam slid into the booth across from me. After he ordered his dinner, I spoke what was on my mind, and had been for quite some time. "Sam, do you think Y/N's okay?"

He tilted his head. "Sure, why not. She likes relaxing in the room alone sometimes."

Shaking my head, I couldn't ignore the fact that something seemed off. "No, it's more than that. She seems, I don't know. Maybe a little sad."

Just then our food arrived, and I took a bite of my burger as I waited to see if Sam would answer. "I don't know Dean. She's  been a little quiet lately, but, she's your girlfriend. Shouldn't you know if somethings up?"

Chewing on my bottom lip, I quickly made the decision. After standing up, I threw some cash down. "Sam, why don't you stay here for a while. Give me some time with her. Make sure everything's okay." 

He nodded, and I left the bar. Stopping at the grocery store, I picked up some of Y/N's favorite items, before heading towards the hotel room.

Your POV

Sam and Dean had only been gone for around an hour, but it seemed much longer than that. During that time, I hadn't moved. Staying on my side, not even having the energy to move, I let my tears fall, not really knowing why. I just knew that my heart hurt, and that I was slowly feeling invisible to everyone I knew and loved. It was not a fun feeling, and I knew the second I said something to Dean, he would try to make things better. But I couldn't say anything. Because that was admitting a weakness, and it just felt wrong. I didn't want people to pity me, or think I was saying these things for attention.

So lost in my thoughts I didn't hear the door open, or Dean step softly into the room. "Oh Y/N." He whispered softly, and you heard the sound of a plastic bag hitting the floor before the bed was dipping down and he was curling his strong, warm body around yours. "Please, tell me. What's wrong?"

His hand brushed the hair back from your face, showing your tear stained face. Without saying a word, knowing if you tried only sobs would come out, you turned and pressed your face to his chest. Wrapping his arms around you, he let you cry. Silently he comforted you, rubbing his hands up and down your back, letting you get it all out.

Minutes passed before you felt calm enough to speak. "Thank you Dean." You whispered, your voice deeper from crying.

"Always. But please, talk to me." He urged you, and you shook your head.

"It's stupid." You hedged, but he wasn't taking no for an answer.

"Nothing you could say or do is stupid. I  can't help you feel better if you don't talk to me." He urged again.

Taking a deep breath, you weren't even sure where to start. "I don't know. I just get this feeling sometimes. Like all the life is sucked from me, and I'm turning invisible. Nobody notices when I turn quiet, or I don't know...its stupid." 

"No, it's not. I hate the fact you think you're invisible. Because you're not. I see you. When you're happy, or sad, or covered in blood. I see you. Like today, I noticed you weren't being you, and it worried me. So I thought you and I could spend a night in, just the two of us?" He told you, holding up the bag, and you looked through it to see all of your favorite junk food. 

"Thank you Dean." You said, pulling out a bag of candy. 

"Anytime sweetheart. Because I do see you, and I want you to always know that." He reiterated before pulling you back in his embrace.