Confetti it's a Parade Book 2

A Horrible Day Part 2

Sleep was not coming to you that night. No matter how you pleaded for it, needing the break from the thoughts racing through your mind, it refused to come. Laying there, your heart shattered into a million pieces, the pillow underneath you soaked with tears, you didn't think you had ever been so miserable.

You weren't sure how you could even face tomorrow. Face the fact that you had once again failed Jensen and this sham of a marriage. That you had failed yourself, ruining your chance at your dream job. There was nothing to look forward to, and the thought made the ache in your heart even more so.

Seeing the clock strike one o'clock in the morning, you turned to your side. Curling into as tight of a ball as you could. Hoping that you could squeeze the pain out of you. So lost in your heartache and pain, you didn't realize you weren't alone until the bed dipped down, and a pair of familiar arms wrapped around your waist. "Y/N, what's wrong?"

You were still frustrated with Jensen. Frustrated with the fact that he was so wrapped up in his own life that he didn't realize how important yesterday had been for you. Hurt that he didn't realize you had needed him yesterday. Needed his comfort when your world had been turned upside down, and you weren't sure you could ever right it once again. So lost in your depressing thoughts, you didn't even answer him. "Y/N, you're scaring me. Please baby."

"Do you really care?" You finally muttered, your tears making the words hard to understand.

"Of course I do!" He insisted. "I love you, and I want you to be okay. Please, just let me help you."

Sniffling back your tears, you turned so your head was pressed against his chest. You needed the comfort his arms provided, even if you were beyond frustrated with him. "If you love me, you would have been here for me today." You answered, feeling him stiffen against you.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He grumbled. "You knew I would be working at the brewery. And it's not against the law to have a few beers with friends."

"You know what? It doesn't even matter. I'm just going to sleep in the guest room." You sighed. Sure, he said he wanted to help, but his attitude spoke differently.

His voice calming, he grasped your wrist when you tried to move. "I'm sorry, don't go. Let's talk this through. Please."

"It was a horrible day." You admitted. "The tire was flat, and by the time I got to the interview, it was too late. They didn't even want to try."

"Shit, that was today? I'm so sorry I forgot!" He exclaimed, frowning. "Don't worry, you'll find an even better job. They don't know what they missed."

"That's not all." You continued, and he glanced up at you in surprise.

"There's more? That's enough for anyone." He replied, trying to pull you against him, but you resisted. Just seconds ago, you had wanted his touch more than you wanted your job, but now you couldn't stand it. The thought of him touching you wasn't easy when you let him down, when you couldn't do something as simple as get pregnant.

"I'm not...I didn't..." You muttered, making no sense.

"Y/N, no matter what it is, we can work through it." He assured you.

Looking up at him with tears in your eyes, you told him the words that hurt more than anything. "I'm not pregnant. Again."

Pulling you tight to him, he pressed a kiss to your temple, tears in his own eyes. "Why? Why does my body hate me? Anyone else can get pregnant, but I can't. There has to be something wrong with me."

"There is nothing wrong with you." He exclaimed. "Things like this happen, and maybe it just wasn't time. But we'll keep trying..."

"No." You answered emphatically. "It hurt so much today, realizing that I didn't work. I don't think I can take that again."

"I'm so sorry." He told you again. "Why didn't you say something? I would have been here in a heartbeat!"

"I was going to, but you wanted to go out with your friends, and..." You cried, tears slipping down your cheeks once again.

"And I was a complete ass, wasn't I?" He muttered, running his hand along his mouth. "Y/N, I don't expect you to forgive me, but let me make it up to you. Tomorrow we can do whatever you like. It will be all about you."

"I just want to forget." You whispered, as he rocked you in his arms. "I want to forget this day ever happened. Can you do that?"

"No." He answered sadly, a tear slipping down his cheek. "I wish I could. I'd do anything to take this pain from you. But please, let me give you tomorrow."

"You mean today?" You asked tiredly, and he nodded. "Fine, but right now I just want to sleep. Hold me, please?"

"Of course sweetheart." He answered. Standing up for a moment, he shed his clothes, before pulling you back against him. Laying your head on his chest, you listened to the gentle beating of his heart. You felt numb, and even though he had apologized and tried to make things right for you, it would take time before you opened yourself up to him, and the hope of a future.

*Yeah, sorry. I was planning on making it fluffy, but this is the way it turned out.**