what's a soulmate? | wolfstar & jily

Chapter Eighty Seven

a few minutes later

"Remus. Moony, darling, we have an hour left. You want to get something to eat or sleep longer?", Sirius whispered, his long hair tickling Remus' face.

"Sleep.", Remus grunted softly, his voice still scratchy. "Take your time. I'll get your clothes.", Sirius smiled, kissing his cheek as he left, closing the door quietly.

"He'd rather sleep. Pete, can you grab those blankets?", Sirius asked, waving his wand at the chocolates, as they flew into the bag.

"Yeah, I got them.", Peter nodded, levitating them into the bag. "I got the food.", James said, nodding as he pushed back his hair.

"Padfoot, you okay?", Peter asked. Sirius stared at book on the bookshelf, breathing heavily.

flashback-- one year before hogwarts

Sirius stared at the book his mother dropped in front of him, the dust making him cough loudly.

"What's this?", he snorted, looking at the title.

"Proper Rules and Etiquette?"

"It's time you learned, Sirius.", Walburga said sternly.

Sirius turned to the first page, looking up at her. "Muggles are unworthy of our attention and time, and are beneath us.", he read aloud.

"Mother, why are they beneath us?"

"Stop asking foolish questions. You know the answer to that.", Walburga yelled.

"But I have a friend who's a Muggle! He's nice!", Sirius protested, and then put his hand over his mouth.

"You what?"

"No, Mother, I was just-", Sirius stuttered. Before he could do anything, Walburga lifted the hem of his shirt with his wand.

"Mother, what are you doing-- Mother, please-", he choked out. "Where is this friend?", she yelled.

"I don't-- I don't know, I just saw him when I was outside and I talked to him, and he went on the bus with his mother.", Sirius cried out, as the hold tightened on his neck.

"You are never to talk to Muggles like they are your friends. Do you hear me?", she asked, lifting him up higher.

"Yes, Mother, please. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.", Sirius pleaded, gasping for air as he clawed at his throat desperately.

"You need to learn your lesson.", Walburga said firmly, opening the door to the cellar. "Not the cellar, please, it's dark down there.", Sirius pleaded.

"Go. Now."

"Please, Mother, I won't do it anymore, I won't be friends with Muggles.", Sirius choked out, shaking and backing away.

"This is my last warning."

"Please, I'm sorry, I promise-", Sirius sobbed, falling to his mothers feet. "Blacks do not beg.", she said sternly, grasping her robes away from his hands.

There was a pause as mother and son stared at each other, ragged breaths coming from Sirius on the ground. "Mother?", Sirius said, his voice cracking as he looked up at her.

Before he knew it, Walburga's hands outstretched towards him, shoving him. Sirius tumbled down the stairs of the cellar, crying out for help as he fell, his head hitting the edge of the last stair.

He rubbed his head, feeling something warm and sticky. His mother closed the door, the last sliver of light disappearing, and Sirius was alone in the dark. He scrambled up the stairs, pounding on the door.

"Mother? Father, Reg-- Anyone, please, it's too dark in here, please?", Sirius choked out, slamming his fist against the door.

"Siri?", Regulus' small voice sounded from outside the door. "Reg- Reg, open the door, it's dark-- I think- I can't breathe.", Sirius yelled.

"I can't-- she put a sort of spell around the door, I'm sorry.", Regulus whispered. "She's coming, I'm sorry. I have to go."

"No-- don't leave.".

But Regulus was gone, and Sirius was all alone.

end of flashback

"Hey, Padfoot, look at me. You want some water?", James whispered, handing him a cup with a green straw in it. Sirius took the cup, staring blankly as he sipped on it.

"What happened?", he croaked, looking at James. "Where's Remus- did I miss the moon?", he asked desperately, standing up.

"Sit down, he's still asleep.", Peter said gently, helping him down.

"You were looking at the book and-- I think you had another panic attack, and you passed out.", James said softly, giving.

"Sorry-- It's nothing. I just saw that book and I just-- I thought of something that happened to me and Regulus a few years ago.", he shook his head.

"I'm fine. It's fine. Let's just go."

"Sirius."

"I said I'm fine.", Sirius muttered, stalking into Remus' room. "Moony, sweetheart, wake up.", he whispered.

"Coming.", Remus grunted, standing up. "My back-", he groaned, clutching it. "I've got you.", Sirius said softly, catching him.

They waled out, James throwing Remus' arm around himself as they hobbled to the shed, Peter following behind them with the bag in his hands.

There was a horrible snapping sound as Remus fell to the ground, letting out a choked sob. "My leg--".

"We got you, Remus, hang on.", Sirius said, forcing a smile as he and James picked him up, walking faster to the shed.

The overwhelming smell of blood and burning flesh from last time overtook them. "Sorry- Forgot to clean up.", Remus cracked.

"Cheeky one, aren't you?", James laughed, as they set him down. Remus looked at the silver shackles on the wall.

"No, Remus.", Peter said sternly. "The shed-- it's not strong enough, it'll be okay.", Remus suggested.

"Stop it, Remus, the burns on your wrists are still healing. You're not doing this to yourself.", James said sternly.

"It's okay, I can take it-- What if I get out?"

"You won't. I promise. Forget about the silver.", Sirius said softly, kissing his lips softly.

Pain overtook Remus' features as he let out a groan of pain, the moonlight hitting his face.

"Step back- just get.. get away.", Remus choked out, falling to the floor.

next morning

Lily opened the door to the shed, to four sleeping boys asleep on the ground. She closed the door softly, not wanting to wake them up.

She laid down on the ground, sighing in relief as she stretched out. "Evans?", James whispered softly, opening his eyes. "Sorry-- I wasn't trying to wake you up.", she whispered, leaning into his chest.

"Mhm.", James muttered, pulling her closer. "How was the mission?", he whispered into her hair. "It was good. How was the moon?", she breathed, snuggling into him.

"Not as bad as last time. I'll let him sleep for now.", James muttered, kissing her head as the two of them went to sleep, the other's heartbeats echoing in their ears.