''What are you waiting for? What are you waiting for? Are you waiting on a lightening strike? Are you waiting for the perfect night? Are you waiting 'til the time is right? What are you waiting for? Don't you wanna learn to deal with fear? Don't you wanna take the wheel and steer? Don't you wait another minute here? What are you waiting for?''
I've never been good at performing infront of a crowd ever since I had my first panic attack my confidence went downhill my Aniexty doesn't help either. I remember when I was in band in Highschool we decided that we wanted to sign up for the talent so we did. This was my first performance and I was excited until I got onto the stage the lights shining down on me and everyone was just staring at me. I didn't know what to do I tried to sing but the words couldn't come out instead I started crying and screaming. I thought that I could do this I was determined to make my family and band proud of me but all that failed. All of my dreams wasn't to be in a band though all I've ever wanted to become was a WWE Diva but how can I become a diva if I can't wrestle infront of big crowds and cameras? I had to atleast try and do this maybe things have changed now.
My name is Jackie I'm trying to chase my dreams and become a wrestler I'm getting help for my panic attacks so that I can debut and get into the ring without too many worries inside my mind. For the next few months I am being forced to be a manager to a wrestler his name is Dean Ambrose. I knew all about his wrestling I knew all about his Jon Moxley days since I used to watch his old wrestling videos. He's a shy guy but how can he speak and perform infront of millions of people and camera's. I wanted to be just like that I want to be able to cut a good promo and to show people what I'm made of show them why I came into the WWE. If I'm going to do all that then I needed all the help that I could get even if I have to be a manager to Dean Ambrose.
''What are you waiting for? You gotta go and reach for the top believe in every dream that you got you're only living once so tell me what are you, what are you waiting for? You know you gotta give it your all and don't you be afraid if you fall you're only living once so tell me what are you, what are you waiting for?''
Tonight I was going to make my debut on national television everyone for all around the world is going to see me and I already feel like I'm going to be sick. This debut isn't for a wrestling match but I wish it was instead Dean is in a match and I'm supposed to stand at ring side cheering him on sounds easy right? I only had this one simple job and if I fail then I will never ever become a WWE Diva I will have to get a job at McDonalds or something.
''Okay, Just pretend that the crowds and the camera's aren't there just imagine yourself inside an empty arena and you'll be fine. You can do this I have believe in you and if you ever feel like you are going to pass out shout me and I will get you some water from the doctor.'' Dean said to me while we were both walking to the entrance I've been told that I also have to wear a Dean Ambrose shirt but I'm not complaining.
''Alright got it, I'll try my best not to pass out I promise'' I smiled at him a little Dean smile back and held onto my hand I squeezed his hand le tting all the nerves out and now it's time to go out there.
The crowd screamed making me go deaf the lights were shining down on us and the cameras were everywhere. I thought I was going to pass out right then but I didn't strangely I kind of like it the fans were giving me this energy that I have never felt before I think I'm going to enjoy being in Dean's corner tonight.
''Are you waiting for the right excuse? Are you waiting for a sign to choose? While you are waiting it's the time to lose what are you waiting for? Don't you wanna spread your wings and fly? Don't you really wanna live your life? Don't you wanna love before you die? What are you waiting for?''
Everyone's eyes were on me instead of the match probably wondering who is this girl? It was uncomfortable at first but when I looked into Dean's eyes all of that went away. How can someone so perfect make all of the nerves go aways I didn't understand these feelings I was feeling towards him. I watched as Dean did the Dirty Deeds on Fandango and went for the piin winning the match. I didn't know what I should do now, do I go into the ring and celebrate Dean's victory with him? Or do I stay out here? Dean put one foot on the bottom rope while looking at me I think he did want me to be in the ring with him so I went inside the ring.
