Band imagines

You have nothing to prove- chris motionless

Tw// homophobia, sexual assault

"Hey mum, dad! I'll be back later!" I yelled before walking out of the door, I planned on going to a part without my parents knowing.

I wasn't exactly on good terms with them at the moment, well it was mostly my dad.

I brought up a scenario about 'a friend' and how they were gay. My dad immediately shut down the idea, and wouldn't let me explain which gave me the answers I needed. It's not safe for me to come out.

I took a seat waiting for the girl I was supposed to meet to show up, some guy came up to me sitting beside me with two drinks in his hand, he shoved one in my hand.

"drink up pretty girl." I shook my head about to tell him I wasn't drinking but he forced my mouth open and poured it down my throat. I tried to shove him off before I choked but I had no choice but to swallow it

"what the hell man!" I yelled shoving his chest, he just put his hands up in defence. "you needed to loosen up a bit."

i looked around the room for someone I knew so I could leave this guy but i didn't. i saw ivory dancing with some girl and it made me feel sick. Was it with jealously?

i'm not gay
i'm not fucking gay.
i'm straight.

he pulled me into his lap and i protested until something snapped in me and i felt like i couldn't move, did i get spiked?

his hands moved up my thigh in a quick motion, in my head i was screaming at him to get off but no noise came out of my mouth. i should be enjoying this, it's a boy giving me attention.

if you do this then you're straight.
pay attention to the boy y/n. It's what dad wants.

he kissed all down my neck, the hunger probably bursting in his stomach as he worked on my tights under the dress I wore. the alcohol numbed it all. i wanted to push him off, take control and get the hell out of here but i couldn't. i felt like i couldn't even breathe. many people walked or danced past us, not even noticing how close he was to my womanhood, i felt sick.

sick that i left him trail all over me. i didn't feel mentally sick anymore, i threw up a bit in my mouth, i managed to get the upper hand and chucked him off and ran to the upstairs bathroom. i slammed on the door and two drunk girls managed to walk out while still sucking each other's faces off.

you didn't want that
you want a boy
a boy

i pushed past them. while i was closing the door i spotted ivory from across the hall and before she could get to me i forcefully shoved the door closed and locked it. i threw up in the sink, orangey brown slush covered the white marble and i carried on throwing out all the touches through my mouth; the taste remained like his hot breath as i gripped onto the edge of the sink, my knuckles turning white.

i used it to keep me on my feet but at this point i couldn't feel my legs, I attempted to reach for my phone to call for help.

what are you doing?!
you're straight!
you should have let him touch you
you should have let him have you
straight

i let the tears release as i tried to clean out the sink. before i noticed, the bathroom door was loudly opened and closed again, someone must have been trying to open it. i cried as the person took me in their arms and let me soak her their jumper similar to mine. i knew it was ivory no one else has the same style as us, they were all preppy and brightly coloured. i chuckled into her chest and she pulled away; still holding me up by my waist

"i'm sorry i could get to you.. i'm so sorry y/n." she mumbles over and over but i could only just make out what she was saying.

tell her you're straight
tell her you're not comfortable with boys
don't look at her lips
TELL HER Y/N YOU'RE LEADING HER ON
god sake, you're the worst person ever
even if you were gay, everyone will hate you if you came out
dad doesn't want a gay daughter

ivory didn't say anything, she studied my features then her eyes trailed to the sink. she did a double take when she saw the mess and gently but forcefully guided me to the side of the bathtub where i tried so hard to keep my head from falling to the side, it felt like it was made of metal.

she grabbed a random white towel and started cleaning up the ungodly puke i had managed to get everywhere. it even got on the mirror. here i was on an ice cold bathroom floor watching my best friend clean up my puke while having a ferocious war in my own head.

i do love her, the only problem is she doesn't love me back.

"i'm gonna get you home y/n so i can explain what happened.." I quickly shook my head.

"No! I'll call Chris to come get me, I'm not going home." I slurred hopelessly. I pulled out my phone dialling his number, I felt like he's the only person I can go to as of right now.

"Hey y/n! It's been a while."

"Chris.." I cried out, I noticed that ivory has left and I was alone. "Y/n? What's wrong? Where are you?" He asked frantically.

"I-I think I got roofied- I can't feel my legs." I admitted now feeling tired. "Help me please"

"I'm on my way, whats the address?!"

I told him though I was struggling to keep my eyes open at this point. "Okay we're outside, where are you too?"

"Bath-room.." I heard the door swing open and the silhouette of a two tall characters, I immediately recognise them as Chris and Justin. "Oh my sweet girl.." Chris kneels down and picks me up, he carries me out to the car and lays me in his lap while Justin drove.

"What happened in there?" He asks running us fingers through my dyed hair. "I was trying to prove something. He was all over me and I let him do it" tears ran down my face while I explained.

"Prove what?" He asked slowly, sounding like he was dreading the answer. "That I'm straight.. dad said he doesn't agree with being gay but I love her!" I cried out desperately.

"You have nothing to prove.. go to sleep angel" I softly cried myself to sleep in the back of his car. I don't know what I would do without my brother..