Band imagines

Disconnected- ben langford-biss

TW// death, loss of a loved one, cancer.

I watched my brother grow up.

I watched him leave for tour, for months, even years at a time and soon he moved out. He was officially gone, his girlfriend turned him against me, she made me out to be a monster and he believed her.

We were never close but he knew when I needed him.

I laid in my bed staring at the same ceiling I have for the last two years, I held the phone to my ear with a weak hold. "Hi you've reached my voicemail-" I ended the call, sighing loudly. It's been the same for too long to remember now, my mum walked into the room with a small bug clearly face smile on her face.

It was the same look that made me feel sick, full of pity.

"I'm not getting better am I?" I ask, the multiple surgeries have failed and it's only a matter of time before it all comes to an end for me.

I had stomached the fact I was going to die a long time ago, they tell you you're supposed to have hope from the beginning but something told me that I would never get better.

The day I got the new it was spreading to my lungs and to my heart was the day I knew that one day I'd take my last breathe, I would take my last breathe of artificial air and I'd finally be at peace and feeling no pain.

"You are y/n! Don't say that!" She yelled. My mother on the other hand still had hope, it was clear it wasn't going to happen.

She stormed out of the room not being able to accept what I had told her, my doctor came in with a sad smile on my face. "How we feeling today, y/n?" I smiled and nodded through the pain I felt.

"I-I'm okay.." He knew I was lying but scribbled on the clipboard. "Can I ask you something?" I asked lowly.

"Of course, anything." He rushed out.

"Don't try to revive me, I'll be okay and I'll find my way. There's a letter under this mattress and if you ever get through to Ben and his band, give it to him." He nods sadly, "I will do.." Him saying that confirmed my thoughts.

Ben's POV

I got a letter delivered to me backstage before we played in Chicago this evening, the Great Depression tour was going great and nothing could ruin this, we felt like we were on cloud nine. Though all day I has this feeling of anxiety sitting in the pit of my stomach, I put it down to the show like I always did but I felt different. I felt disconnected.

I pulled out the paper realising it was a letter.

"Dear Ben,

It's been a while big brother, I tried to call you but I could never get through to you. As much as it is more humane to tell you in person I know I won't get the chance, I didn't want you finding out from mum or dad, I wanted you to hear it from me.

I'm sick Ben.

Well, if you're reading this, I was sick.

It's still early on but the cancer is spreading fast, my hair is falling out and I'm not the same person you would picture when you think of me.

I think I'm kinda glad you will never get to see me this way, you'll never have to picture me looking lifeless, you'll have a nice imagine of me. One that's less scary.

I have watched from afar you grow up into the incredible person you are today. You, Patty, Foley and Ali are grown men now, you're leaving your mark on the world like you have always dreamt to do. I'm so proud of you. I remember the day you asked me to do your makeup and I taught you how to do it.