Band imagines

T is for trauma - justin morrow

Tw// brief mentions of sh and sa:))

"Get out of my house!!" My mother scream as she gives me a forceful shove out of the door.

I stumble onto the cold, wet concrete into the rain. The rain masked my tears for me but I wasn't the type of person to show my emotions at all. It was a rare occurrence that I would show any type of emotion but in the moment I was terrified. I'm being kicked out of my own house, I'm a lonely teenager. Who wouldn't be scared.

I get up and bang on the closed door, begging her to let me in. "Please! I have nowhere to go!!" The rain soaked my clothes which made me shiver where I stood.

I get no response, only silence while I wrapped my arms around myself to get and contain some kind of heat. I sob quietly as I walk down the street with no idea as to where I'm going.

I mean I had one place but I wouldn't dare show my face there; he has his own family now.

He has a baby to care for, he doesn't need me on top of that. It's just extra work for him to deal with.

My dad called me once a month at most.

He told me he was proud of me but what does he have to be proud of? He didn't raise me.

He shouldn't feel proud of his child who's grown up without him.

I mean, what can I do? Yell at him and tell him how much I needed my dad?

Sometimes I wonder why I still crave for his validation. I still crave for the moment I get to hug him like a child would to their parent, I'm only setting myself up to get hurt because I know it will never happen.

It's a dreaded cycle.

The pathetic part is, I will always forgive him. I will always love him and I hate myself for it.

I just need his love.

I mean I wiped off my own tears, I bandages my own self inflicted wounds, I kept my sexual assault story to myself for too years, I got myself clean, I cleaned up my own vomit when I tried to take my own life. I did it all by myself I'll be fine without him..

I snapped out of my thoughts finally, noticing I'm stood in front of a beautiful house.

His house.

I brought up my shaking hand to knock on his door, soon a purple haired guy swings open the door. The smile on his face soon disappearing as he realised who I was.

"Oh my god.. y/n, come inside quickly before you get sick." He pulls me inside and grabs a blanket from his couch. "What are you doing walking in the rain this late?"

I couldn't bring myself to speak to him.

"Babe! Who was it?" His wife I knew very little of stepped into my view, "y/n! Let me get you a change of clothes!" She rushes out of the room and up the stairs.

"What happened?" Justin sighs resting his hands on my shoulders. "I-I don't know why I came here actually." I mumble, not being able to bring myself to look at him.

"You're always welcome here you know that." He smiles softly. Shae returns with clothes in her hand, "there's a bathroom down the hall.." I nod slowly taking the clothes from her hand and walking to the bathroom.

I change into my given clothes staring at myself in the mirror, I feel so selfish.

I step out of the bathroom hearing a crying baby, my heart broke and I don't even know why.. I hear Justin trying his best to shush the upset child but nothing seems to be working.

I walk into the living room and pick up the baby, I hold her close to my chest and hush her softly. I give her small pats on the back and soon enough she stops crying.

"You seem like a natural, y/n." I look up to see both Shae and Justin admiring me. "I-I'm sorry that was so rude-" Shae cuts me off. "Don't be silly, come sit down." I sit beside her on the couch while cradling the small baby.

"Are you going to tell me what happened now?" Justin questions after a moment of silence. "Mom kicked me out of the house and I have nowhere to go. I'm sorry for intruding but I didn't even plan on coming here my feet but brought me here." I rant on and on only to have Justin kiss my forehead.

"You can stay with us.. heck, you're part of the family. I mean our kid seems to love you and you could be a real help around here." I couldn't help but smile at him.

"I feel like I'm intruding though.."

"You might not think you need us but I for sure will always need you."

He could be lying to me but I'll still believe anything he says. How can I not? Like I said, I crave any kind of attention from him.