tom holland ; imagines

pancake angst

summary: tony dying fucked you & peter up but pancakes help (i honestly don't know how to sum this up lol)

warnings: swears, angst & a bit of fluff

"You haven't touched your pancakes yet..."

you looked at your plate, the golden brown fresh cakes were just sitting there underneath the syrup & blueberries. it looked great, but you didn't feel like eating. you just stayed silent as the warmth of your— peter's hoodie was wrapped around your upper body.

your lifeless like gaze moved up to him, who sat across from you in the booth of the small restaurant. it was cozy.

"don't feel like eating" you said looking into his brown eyes that you could tell were laced with concern & care.

reaching his hand across the table, his left hand held your right one comfortingly.

"did you eat anything today?" he asked, noticing how you glanced at the table & his eyes, switching every few seconds.

shaking your head no, peter sighed as he thought of what to say next.

"i know things are hard right now but—"

"don't give me any of that sugar coating shit peter. that isn't gonna do me any good" you cut him off, your tone sounding harsh but vulnerable.

"it's my first christmas without him & i fucking hate it. life is shit okay?" you spat, focusing your eyes on your stupid pancakes.

"don't act like you were the only one who lost him... i-i lost him too" he said softly, letting go of your hand to cross his arms on his chest.

"he was my dad peter! m-my dad! i know that he was a father figure for you & that he cared for like a son but he was my fucking dad!"

"& he's gone & i can't use scott's time realm thing to bring him back. i can't get strange to help me or bruce. he's dead & i'm never gonna get him back" you said with tears filling up your eyes.

that was the most you've talked in months, which surprised peter. but he took all your words in as he played with his left over waffles with his fork.

"i know what it's like to loose a parent, well uh make that two for me— but anyways, it's hard. it's really hard for the first couple years. but as time goes on it hurts less & less" peter said, eyes meeting yours.

"things are always hard around christmas. but you still have me & your mom. you also got ned, mj, betty, bruce, wanda & scott. you're not alone cause we all feel pain & sad about mr. stark... but we just gotta stick together" he said sincerely, giving you a sad smile.

"i miss him peter. t-this isn't fair..." you trembled, wiping your tears.

peter quickly got up & sat on your side of the booth with you, pulling you into his chest so you could cry into him.

"i know babe, i know you miss him" he comforted you, rubbing your back as your arms were secure around his torso.

christmas music played softly through the restaurant as snow fell from outside. you just tried to focus on peter's heartbeat so you'd calm down. you are in a public place, not the sage walls of the compound.

"why don't i feed you? i know it sounds weird but uh... you need to eat something before we head home" he whispered to you once you calmed down, nodding your head in his chest.

peter grabbed your fork with his left hand & cut up your pancakes into medium pieces so he could feed them to you.

"here comes the airplane" he said with a laugh, bringing the fork with pancake on it closer to your mouth.

"shut it" you said with a growl, kissing his cheek quickly as a thank you before eating the food, feeling better already.

his right hand was rubbing circles on the side of your waist until you finished eating your whole plate of food. peter congratulated you by kissing your head & cheeks a few times before giving you a proper kiss before your head found home on his chest.

"dad would be happy your keeping your promise" you said as you played with your hoodie strings with one hand.

peter looked at you confused for a moment as he placed the fork down.

"he told me before he left to get you back that uh, you promised him you'd always take care me. & your taking care of me right now" you said quietly, looking up at him sheepishly.

"i promised him i'd take care of you, i intend to keep it" peter said looking down at you with a soft smile.

even though your heart still hurt & you had a long way to go before you'd be okay again, you knew that as along as you had peter to help you, you'd be alright. peter was the answer to your problems.