Trent Alexander-Arnold #7

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Day 12 of CountDown to Christmas

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away

You and Trent had met out shopping one day. You had accidentally bumped into him knocking what he was holding all over the floor. Apparently, it was a drink so you had offered to buy him a new one which he had agreed to. Cliche you know but it's what happened. Slowly you gained feelings for Trent and on Christmas, you told him about how you feel and you thought that he felt the same. You put your feelings right there on the table. You gave him your heart something that you rarely do. The following day though you saw Trent kissing someone else and it broke your heart into pieces. You gave him your heart and he gave it away like it was nothing.

This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

You remember the tears falling down your face as you ran away from the room that you saw him in. Because of this, you kept your heart closed off and built up walls letting nobody in. Someone special will come around and only then will you open your heart up again. You cannot go through that pain again especially not exactly a year later.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away (you gave it away)
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special (special)

You and Trent got to know each other slowly. You took everything at a slow pace and you generally believed that he liked you. You knew that he was good looking but his personality was what made him better. That is what made you fall for him anyway. You're not someone to really express your feelings so to tell Trent how you feel was a massive deal and he threw it back in your face.

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance, but you still catch my eye

The first time you saw him he hurt you. Bad. You didn't want to see him again frightened that everything will happen again. You couldn't go near him. Even after a year it still hurt so you had to keep your distance. As much as you could anyway. You can just look up and you see him. It's like he's the only other person in the room considering you constantly find him out of everyone.

Tell me, baby, do you recognise me?
Well, it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me

It's nearly been a year since you had last seen Trent in that room with that girl and since then you haven't seen him. You see him look in your direction and straight at you before turning away and continue to look around the room. Does he even recognise you still? You haven't changed much in the year yet it's still like he doesn't recognise you. He sees so many people because of his job so it's not surprising that he doesn't recognise you. Why would he recognise you, you weren't important to him.

"Merry Christmas" I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love you", I meant it

You had sent him a Christmas card as you do to everyone else but in his, you wrote more and sent it to him. You meant every word that you said to him in that card. You had to write it knowing that you would never be able to get those words out but you were opposite him when he read it. He gave you a smile and kissed you on the cheek when he read those words. You generally thought that the feelings you had were reciprocated but clearly, you were wrong. He didn't feel the same as you. You meant it but he didn't.

Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now, I know you'd fool me again

You were an absolute fool. Why would he fall for you when he can have anybody. He can have anybody in the world and you were foolish enough to believe that he would want you. You, an awkward person who spilt his drink all over him when you first met over a model. Not going to happen. You knew though. You knew if Trent walked over to you right now and kissed you, you would kiss back. You would instantly fall back into his arms and you knew that it was stupid but it would happen. He would just make a fool of you again but you would also let him.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away (you gave it away)
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special (special)
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special (special)
Ohh
Oh, oh, baby

No matter how hard you tried to forget what happened last year you couldn't. It was replaying in your head over and over again. It hurt. It hurt a lot but you had to try to forget and move on. Only if it was that easy.

A crowded room, friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice

It was late into the night so many people around. It was crowded. You didn't even know most of the people in the room as there were too many people. You just stayed around your friends not wanting to leave them at any point. Every time you would look up you saw Trent speaking to people. Sometimes it would be his teammates, sometimes it would be his mates and other times it would be random girls. You were hiding from him though not wanting to see him again and again knowing how much it hurt. Seeing that smile hurt because it wasn't directed at you. Your friends were tired of you hiding but never said anything but you could tell. His soul and heart had to be full of ice after what he did to you. He knew that you liked him yet still went and kissed that girl when he knew you were around and made sure to do it somewhere where he could be seen. He didn't care for anyone but himself.

My God, I thought you were someone to rely on
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on

When you and Trent first met and spoke you thought that you could rely on him. He seemed like someone who could help you and you could rely on him as he could rely on you. The more time went on and the more you two got to know each other the more personal things that you would be shared between you both and you would even see Trent cry a number of times. Trent would come over to you crying and you would always help him. His eyes would fill with water and his bottom lip would start to wobble so you would wrap your arms around him and allow him to cry on your shoulder. You wanted to make him feel better but that's all you were to him. A shoulder to cry on.

A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man under cover but you tore me apart
Ooh, ooh, now I've found a real love
You'll never fool me again

Trent would look at you with love in his eyes. Well, that's what you believed it to be at first but looking back you were completely wrong. You thought it was love and that he wanted to be with you. That wasn't his aim though. His aim was to tear you apart and he succeeded. You watched as Trent kissed another girl right across the room and you could tear your eyes away from it. The only thing that tore you away from the sight was a guy that came over to talk to you. He wasn't that good looking. Well not as good looking as Trent but that was fairly difficult and he didn't make you laugh as hard but it was someone else. You weren't going to open your heart up straight away to the guy but you could speak to him. You weren't allowing Trent to do the same thing to you again. He would never play with your heart again. He will not make a fool out of you again.

What you didn't know was Trent was watching you the whole time and only kissed the girl to see if you got jealous. He felt terrible about last year. Knowing that you liked him yet he still kissed that girl. It was stupid and he knows that and he can't say why he exactly he did it but he did. He knows now that he likes you but he also knows you will never take him back. You don't realise what you have until it's gone. Now Trent understands that saying more than anyone and it's too late to sort it out.

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