Ohne Dich (Sequel to Stirb Nicht Vor Mir)

Chapter 94

May 4, 2005

Corey was busy looking for apartments so that when he came back, he would have somewhere to stay. Until then, he was staying with me, but we were sleeping in separate rooms. 

"No," I told Neil over the phone. "I was literally just telling you how he never does that, and then he goes and does it to Amelia."

"It was just a one-time thing."

"I highly fucking doubt that."

"Language!"

"All the kids are school."

"Kids?"

"Corey's kids, too. Well, he took Griffin to go get some clothes or whatever."

"So, it's just you?"

"It's just me, Neil."

"Don't stress out about Ashton."

"Does he run up to you and hug you?"

"What?"

"Does he run up to you and hug you when he sees you?"

"Adette-"

"Just answer the fucking question!"

"Yes, he does, but he-"

"No, no. Stop. It's fine."

"It's fine?"

"It's fine," My voice cracked.

"Adette-"

I hung up the phone and started crying. Why didn't my son hug my anymore? I was a much better mother than Amelia-she didn't even know how it feels to be a mother. She didn't know how it felt to give birth-the pain I went through. She didn't know all the pain that came along with parenting-the pain, the stress, the worries, the heartache-but also the love. At the end of the day, you wouldn't want anything bad to happen to your child. You just love them with all your heart.

I decided to take a bath and shave. 

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After I finished blow drying my hair, I put on my bra and underwear, then my shirt, but didn't have enough time to put on my pants as I heard yelling outside. I ran outside and saw Corey and Neil standing there. 

"SHE'S FINE!" Corey shouted, then his eyes widened as he looked at me. 

"Why are you two yelling?!" I asked. 

Corey turned Griffin away from me, so I raised my eyebrows, but then I remembered-I had no pants on. How had I forgotten so soon? I ran inside, put my leggings on, then ran back outside. 

"She comes clothed!" Neil shouted. 

I slapped him on the shoulder. "What are you doing here?"

"Making sure that you were okay."

"I'm fine, Neil."

"You were crying."

"Everyone cries."

"You were crying because of your son and I know you feel like he loves us more. I was concerned-especially with your history with suicide and-"

"I get it! I get it. Thanks for checking up on me."

"Then I guess I'll be going. Bye."

He got into his car and drove away. 

"What the fuck was that about?" Corey asked as we walked inside.