Sneaky

Chapter 111

...He killed his best friend...

"You saw what he was like. How he pushed me." I watched Rick moving around, still looking at & facing everyone but he can't seem to keep his feet still. "How he compromised us. How he threatened us."

Someone he's known since he was a kid, and he — he had to kill him. Because of me and the kid.

God, Rick... what is that gonna do to him?

My eyes moved over to Randall and he looks as shell shocked as the rest of us.

Carl burst into tears and I looked over just as his cries were lost in the muffling of his dad's jacket and Lori's chest as his mother wrapped her arms around him.

Call me crazy, but this doesn't look like news to Lori. Did she know? Since when?

"He staged the whole Randall thing." Rick looked at Lori and I can't help but notice how she isn't looking at him. "Lead me out to put a bullet in my back." It's almost like he's saying it for the second time. "He gave me no choice!"

"He was my friend, but he came after me."

"My hands are clean." As a whistle, I'm sure.

Lori shushed Carl, who's full on sobbing into her neck now.

The rest of the group is silent. Everyone looking at Rick but not like he's a monster.

It seems I'm not the only one who isn't gonna shed tears over Shane's grave.

We all knew he was dangerous and explosive. It wasn't exactly a secret.

All of us had our problems with Shane, to different extremes.

I watched Rick carefully as he paced back and forth.

"Maybe you people are better off without me."

What?

"Go ahead" Rick motioned at the entrance way behind him. "I say there's a place for us but maybe — maybe that's just another pipe dream."

"Maybe — maybe I'm foolin' myself again." he spit. "Why — why don't — why don't you go and find out yourself." he all but bared his teeth at us in a snarl.

"Send me a postcard." Sure. Is by carrier pigeon ok?

"Go on, there's the door." he prompted like some asshole gettin' in your face saying, 'hit me'.

"You can do better? Let's see how far you get." he motioned again with his python.

'Why do I feel like I'm in some old western showdown?'

He knows no one's going anywhere. They're too scared. And everyone not too scared, is too smart, too tired, or too noble to go a'wol. Even though I'm positive Daryl & I aren't the only ones who've considered taking off in recent weeks.

What exactly are you trying to accomplish here, Grimes?

"No takers? Fine. But get one thing straight," his voice turned serious, face relaxing down into the set of his jaw, staring the group down like someone he's about to take a swing at them.

"You're stayin', this isn't a democracy anymore." Rick shook his head.

No one said a word.

And Rick walked away, out into the dark. Where to? Who knows.

I don't like the idea of someone else dictating what I do but I'm too exhausted to argue right now.

That's a later me's problem. Or maybe it isn't a problem at all.